#trigun angst

“Nai, stop it! Please!” Vash begged, as he tugged helplessly against the only chain keeping him bolted to the wall. 

“This pathetic human tried to set you free, but I’ll take care of this soon enough.” Knives sneered, forcing Y/N to a standing position she couldn’t fully maintain from her injury. 

The metallic coils came out from his back, slowly inching closer and closer to her body. She gulped hard, giving one last look to Vash before spouting out the only thing that came to mind.

“I’m pregnant.”

Knives smirked, expression almost amused by her desperate ploy. “Did you really think that would matter to me?” 

She gulped as a cold sweat dripped down the back of her neck. “It would if it was Vash’s baby.”

If she had been paying attention, Y/N would’ve heard the slightest of gasps leave Vash’s mouth but she was too busy maintaining eye contact with the man that held her hostage in his grip; a grip that grew tighter once she uttered those words. 

“That’s not possible.” He growled back to her. 

This time she smirked as the urge to taunt him pushed her rationale to the back of her mind, “How are you so sure? You and Vash are the only independents in the world, and I don’t think that you’ve tested the theory yourself.”

His grip tightened around her leg, causing her smirk to die on her lips while the heat of her own blood dripped into a puddle on the floor. “It’s not possible; plants are perfect in every way, bringing life to this broken world and humans are disgustingly flawed, spreading like the pathetic parasites you all are!”

“It is possible!” Y/N shouted back to him, surprised to hear the desperation cause her voice to waver. “A plant and human hybrid; the only one of its kind. A new species, a new life. Would you really destroy one of your own?”

In a blink, Knives whipped the pointed edge of one of his blades a mere inch from her eye threatening to gouge it out; the anger within him reaching its boiling point. “You are not one of my own!” 

Y/N took the smallest of breaths, fearing that any sudden movement would cause her to lose an eye. “But Vash is.”

Knives’ eyes narrowed but otherwise made no other movements as he took in her words. 

“And if you care about your brother, you wouldn’t murder the one thing he loves.” 

Suddenly, the fluorescent lights blacked out causing an immediate red night to replace it as a loud whirring sound crashed somewhere in the building. 

“What is this?” Knives muttered out loud as he became distracted by the sound and lights. 

Before he could do anything the sound of bullets whizzing toward causing him to duck away, loosening his grip on Y/N completely. He made quick movements backward, using his bladed coils as a shield from the spray of bullets being fired at him. 

Then while bullets still rained from beyond the darkness of the hallway facing him, a cacophony of multiple metallic objects clinking against the floor echoed throughout the gigantic room. Knives could make out several cynical objects hit the floor before they doused the room in smoke, a large plume of fog blocking his view of anything. 

Vash stared in shock for a moment then snapped back to reality when he saw the familiar figure approaching him, “Meryl? What are you doing here?” 

“Hush now! We’re here to save you!” Meryl quickly retorted while still a lockpick into the only cuff keeping Vash chained up. Once she unlocked it, she grabbed his hand and b-lined for the exit. 

“Wait! What about Y/N? I have to go get her!” Vash pleaded, pulling back from Meryl a bit as they ran. 

“Don’t worry, Wolfwood and Roberto got her! Now let’s go!” She shouted over the gunfire. 

Vash, though scared, trusted her word and followed her without resistance. 

It took a while because as it turned out, Wolfwood had thrown a few more smoke bombs as they ran into the hallway to cover their tracks but eventually Vash and Meryl managed to meet up with Wolfwood and Roberto further down. 

When Vash saw Y/N, bleeding and being held up by Roberto he ran to her. “Y/N, are you okay? You’re bleeding so much.”

Y/N shook her head in a whimper, in too much pain to offer any kind of reply. 

“Of course, she’s not okay. She’s got cuts all over her leg and she’s bleeding all over the place.” Roberto quipped with Y/N’s arm still over his shoulder while he kept her standing. 

“Hate to break up the reunion, but if we don’t get out of here soon a bleeding leg is gonna be the least of our worries.” Wolfwood cut in, keeping a sharp eye on the hallway they just escaped from. 

“But Y/N can’t run, how are we gonna get outta here before Knives finds us?” Meryl asked with urgency, her own panic rising to the surface. 

“Give her to me.” Vash said, walking over in front of Y/N and crouching down. “Get on my back and I’ll carry you.” 

Without a word, Y/N slipped her arm from around Roberto’s shoulder and precariously leaned down to wrap her arms around Vash’s neck and legs around his waist. He reached back to grip the underside of her thighs and propped her up as he stood. 

She made a muffled hiss as the pressure of moving her leg at all caused pain to shoot up through her body. 

“Ready?” Vash asked her, glancing over his shoulder at her. She gave a pained nod before tucking her face into the back of his neck.

“Okay, let’s blow this joint.” Wolfwood huffed, turning to face them. 

Everyone began running as fast as they could out of the building and just when they’d turned their backs to the hall, several bladed whips propelled out from the smoke screen towards their direction. 

“Watch out!” Wolfwood shouted, stopping briefly to point his cross shaped gun towards the blades and fired. He aimed with precision, each bullet bouncing off the whips as it made each one change trajectories.

“Wolfwood!” Vash exclaimed and too, stopped briefly to wait. 

“Keep running, Needle-noggin! I got this!” 

Vash hesitantly kept running, and glanced over his shoulder again in time to see Wolfwood making a quick getaway with them after shooting a couple more times. 

Luckily, the team managed to escape the maze-like building and to the outside. They ran and ran and ran until they were outside the city; their truck waiting for them not too far from the main entrance. In a flash, they hurried inside and Meryl punched the gas without even bothering with her seatbelt; leaving puffs of sand in their wake. 

She floored it a good fifteen minutes before Vash told her to stop. Once stopped Vash administered some first aid to Y/N’s leg, giving them a moment to talk. 

Vash had finished cleaning all the cuts in her once bloodied limb when he spoke. “Is it true? That you’re pregnant?”

He knew that while Y/N had said such a thing in the heat of the moment so Knives would spare her, he couldn’t deny the sincerity of her words. She sounded so scared, so afraid for not just her own life but possibly her baby’s as well. 

Y/N took a moment to prepare her words and she timidly nodded. “I think so.”

“How long have you suspected?” Vash spoke softly, keeping his voice low as if speaking at normal volume would cause her to shatter. 

“A couple of we-EKS!” She hissed when Vash began applying the bandages to the open wounds which made him utter out a quick apology, though continued to wrap her leg. 

Vash said nothing, his brain thinking a million miles a minute. He honestly didn’t know what to think; he was a plant and Y/N was a human, could plants and humans even procreate? Or was it something else, something life threatening? He did notice in the last few weeks that Y/N hadn’t been acting like herself but he thought perhaps it was the heat getting to her, or maybe they had been stuck inside the car for too long or even that time of the month but the idea of her carrying his child never crossed his mind. He assumed that because he and Y/N were two different species, there was no way. 

“Vash?” Y/N called to him, bringing him out of his thoughts and back to reality.

He looked up at her, worry and fear etched in her face. “Sorry, love.” 

“It’s okay. I understand that it’s probably a lot to take in.”

Vash shook his head, “I was just lost in thought.” 

“Are you upset?” Y/N nervously asked, making Vash raise his hand to gently cup her cheek as a tender smile graced his lips.  

“Of course I’m not upset, I’m only worried about you since I’m not completely sure if it’s possible for plants and humans to have children together.” He carefully explained watching Y/N tilt her cheek to rest fully into his palm. 

Y/N sighed, “I’m not sure either but all the symptoms are there. And even though I don’t know much about plants, I can’t imagine what else it could be.” 

Vash sat up on his knees, retracting his hand from her face but soon leaned forward to hug her from her spot from the truck. She happily reciprocated when she wrapped her arms around his midsection, face buried in his shoulder. 

“We should go see Luida.” He suggested kissing her temple and stroking her back comfortingly. 

He felt her nod against him. “She can fix up your leg and she probably knows more about plants than I do or something along those lines that might help figure this whole thing out.” 

“Okay.” Y/N simply said, going silent and enjoying the presence of Vash holding her. 

Vash didn’t say anything else either and like Y/N, opted to enjoy the warmth of her against him. 

He thought back to only minutes earlier, when Y/N had attempted to save him and Knives quickly finding her, hurting her and the screams she let out. 

Never in his life did he ever want to hear those sounds again. 

Vash "self esteem? what's that" "The Stampede" Saverem has... reservations about his own body and how it looks, but those do not exist towards you even a little bit. I can see him either being loudly supportive (think bragging about how pretty his girlfriend looks in her new dress to anyone who'll listen) to a lot more personal and private (holding you around your waist whenever there's a chance to and keeping you close, just so you know he likes having you near.)

He's very encouraging but not pushy when you talk about things you don't think you can do. Like if you're hesitant to start wearing make-up or letting your hair get longer he very gently, but in plain English (or whatever language it is they speak on Gunsmoke,) says that no one is stopping you from doing whatever you want with your body. "And either way, you know I'll love you to the moon and back!" He always adds, giving your hand a little squeeze. He wants you to feel more comfortable with yourself, but he knows that just shoving you out into the spotlight won't do you any good.

If you flip that back on him though, he gets all shy and clammy. He says things like you don't have to be polite and call him handsome. He knows that his scars are pretty gnarly, and that they probably wouldn't look any better even if he did have the resources to treat them properly. It can turn into a spiral pretty fast until you swoop in with a kiss to the crown of his head to snap him out of it.

Because you two didn't start dating for each other's bodies. That's just not how it works for Vash. He might be a bit flirty and forward but you know, he doesn't actually cross the threshold all that often, so it means a hell of a lot first of all, to be alright with you seeing him without his shirt on, and even to just. Be around him for this long. He's flighty, he's nervous, he doesn't want to drag you down into the sand with him, but you don't want him down there either!!

Sometimes it feels like you two are treading metaphorical water, either from the stress of being on the run or from not being all that comfortable in your own skin, but don't you ever think for a second that you're alone. Vash'll always be there to love you and tell you you're pretty and that there's nobody else he'd rather call his Mayfly and you're there to return the favor, kiss the marks that glow on his cheeks or the feathers that sprout from his neck or even just give his flesh and blood hand a squeeze when he gets that distant look in his eyes.

The sun was setting, casting a warm glow over the room. You laid in bed with your eyes closed, breathing softly. Vash sat next to you, holding your hand.

You had taken a turn for the worst. He asked you why you still fight so hard, even now?

“I want to be with you as long as I can”, you told him with a smile. 

He had done everything to try and make you feel comfortable, safe, and loved.

“Do you remember when we first met?” he asked, his voice soft.

You smiled, your eyes still closed. “Of course I do. You were so nervous.”

He chuckled. “I was, wasn’t I? But I knew from the moment I saw you that you were the one for me.”

You squeezed his hand. “I knew it too.”

You both sat in silence for a moment, the only sound the gentle hum of the wind outside.

“I’m so grateful for the life we’ve had together”, he said, his voice thick with emotion, “All the adventures we’ve been on, all the memories we’ve made. I wouldn’t trade it for anything”.

“Me neither,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper.

He leaned over and kissed your forehead. “I love you“.

I love you too,” you told him.

He sat there for a while longer, holding your hands, watching the sun set.

The room was silent except for the sound of the machines beeping. Vash sat by your side, holding your hand tighter now. He knew that you were leaving him soon, and he didn’t want to let you go.

“Please don’t leave me”, he whispered, tears streaming down his face. 

He couldn’t help it. A part of him felt that if he begged you, you would stay. You would stay, like how you’ve always stayed. But a part of him knew that wouldn’t happen. He knew you just couldn’t stay this time.

You opened your eyes and looked at him, a faint smile on your lips.

“I think I need to go, my love. But I will always be with you…I promise..”, you whispered while softly twirling his wedding ring on his finger. He leaned in and kissed you softly on the forehead again.

“I will wait for you in our forest....I love...you...”, you whispered.

You closed your eyes and took your last breath. Vash sat there for a long time, holding your hand and crying. But he knew that you were at peace now, and that you would always be with him.

As he stood up to leave, he felt a cold breeze brush against his cheek. He smiled to himself, knowing that it was you, telling him that you were still with him.

*****

Seven years later, Vash sat at his desk, surrounded by papers and documents. He had been working on his final arrangements for hours, making sure everything was in order. He had to make sure something went to SEEDS, but most of everything he and his wife had to offer was going to their son and his family.  

As he wrote, his mind wandered to the forest he worked so hard to give you. He remembered the tall trees, the sound of the leaves rustling in the wind, and the smell of the sand after a rainstorm. It was a peaceful place, and he had always felt at home there. With you. 

You had brought the forest to life with your care and patience for floral maintenance. You made a small corner a food forest for the small town. People from town would help with the fruits and vegetables in exchange they got to take some home. The forest had started thriving so well, that new life wildlife had made it their home. It was so lively and beautiful…..and perfect. Absolutely perfect.

Vash finished the paperwork. He made his way to his son’s house. He spent dinner with his family, making sure to bring his granddaughter some red geraniums. After dinner, he handed his son the envelope. Gave him a hug, hanging on for a few moments longer than he normally would. His son squeezed him back for just a moment, he knew what this meant. He thanked his dad for everything and Vash headed back towards his home. 

Vash made his way back to the house he shared with you, where you both raised your son, where so many memories were made. Very soon, his son’s family would be moving in. They were needing a bigger home. He goes inside and sighs. Nothing has changed in seven years since he lost you. 

The ‘World’s Best Dad’ mug still sat in the same spot on the counter. The same homemade patchwork blanket laid across the back of the couch. He slowly walked around the house, looking at all the pictures you had put on the wall. How after Meryl gave you a camera, you filled so many photo albums and put so many pictures on the walls. Vash never minded it, he thought it was beautiful. 

He made his way to the backyard and couldn’t help but smile to himself at what he saw. The forest. Their forest. The project they took on together to help bridge the gap between humans and plants. The place that helped so many people and wildlife alike.

 He walked to the main entrance when something out of the corner of his eye caught his attention. A small Mayfly, buzzing around the secret entrance he made for you when he first surprised you with this place. He bent down and slowly made his way through the almost hidden entry way.

Vash walked through the dense forest, the leaves and small sticks crunching beneath his feet. He had been coming to this spot for years, ever since his wife had passed away. It was their special place, where they had spent countless hours together, talking, laughing, and enjoying each other’s company.

As he walked, he remembered all the times you both had there together. He remembered the way you had laughed at his jokes, the way you had looked at him with love in your eyes. He remembered the way you had held his hand, the way you had kissed him.

Suddenly, he felt something behind him. He turned, but there was no one there. He shrugged it off and continued walking.

But the presence persisted. He felt it all around him, like a warm embrace. He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply, feeling what he came to understand as his wife’s spirit all around him.

He smiled, a few tears streaming down his face. He knew that you were with him, just like you promised. He laid down and looked at the forest all around him.

He sighed.

“Don’t worry Mayfly, I’ll be with you soon. Thank you for waiting for me.”, he closed his eyes and smiled to himself, relaxing and enjoying the feel of the wind around him.