#trekken81

“Is this seat taken?” 

Hazel eyes glided into your view, framed by a tan face, dark hair, and a gentle smile. 

“Yes, actually, it’s reserved for my feet.” You smirked up at him and stuck your feet up onto the chair. 

“And why aren’t those feet out on the dance floor?  Especially since they are connected to a beautiful young woman such as yourself.” A handsome smile curled at his lips.

You rolled your eyes and huff, but you couldn’t hide a grin, “Are you asking me to dance...”

“Leonard.  Leonard McCoy.”

Another knock, and a soft voice, indecipherable behind the closed door. 

“You’re an asshat, Leonard McCoy.”

Footsteps were following close behind you,“Wait, Y/N, I can explain. Just stop.”

You didn’t. 

“I always meet douchy guys at that bar, I thought I was wrong for once.  Guess the streak continues.”

You fumbled with your keys, frustrated with your shaking hands. 

“Come on, darlin’.  Let me explain.” He appeared at your side, taking your keys and deftly unlocking the door in one controlled movement. 

“No.” You stepped into the room, blocking Leonard from entering, “And don’t call me ‘darlin’’.”

You slammed the door in his face. 

Stepping in, you threw your bag against the wall and pressed your hands to your forehead before dragging your fingers through your hair and letting a few tears fall.  Looking back towards the door, you saw his silhouette just outside the translucent glass, leaning up against the door frame, as if he was pressing his forehead against the door. 

“Hey, Y/N?  I’m sorry.  Listen, I really am.  Y/N?”

Another knock woke you from your memory. 

“Y/N? Are you in there?” An voice just outside the door. 

Your tongue was thick in your mouth, your limbs heavy, and you couldn’t bring yourself to move from your fetal position on the bed. 

I could fall or I could fly Here in your aeroplane I could live, I could die Hanging on the words you say I've been known to give my all And jumping in harder than 10,000 rocks on the lake

“Y/N?” The swishing of the door. 

A splash.  You didn’t realize at the time but every moment after that sound would be the worst moments of your life. 

You twisted in the sheets, your legs getting tangled and you felt like you were trapped. 

You were dragged under again.  No air.  You struggled against the dead weight that you had your arms wrapped around and you barely managed to breach the surface.  Air. 

Your toes finally found purchase on the sheets and you were able to kick them off.  Air. 

Through your kicking and thrashing you somehow managed to move to where your tip toes touches the sand below the freezing water.  You couldn't let go of the weight that dragged you backwards.  You couldn't let go. 

A hand on your shoulder, a face hovering over you.

"Hey, did you hide my socks?" A warm breath tickled your hair and you peeled your eyes open. 

"What?" The words slid out of your sleepy lips. 

"My socks." Leonard's face was inches from yours, his body hovered over yours, "You know, the yellow-striped ones, I can't find them." 

"Ohhhh." You sighed, turning over under the blankets, pulling it up under your chin as you settled back into the bed, your eyes falling shut again, "Havn' seen 'em."

"I need them, darlin', my shift starts in 5 minutes." Leonard carded his hands through your hair and pulled at the blankets. 

"Nooo." You groaned, sliding deeper, away from his caressing hands, "Iz not my fault you need your stupid lucky socks."

"They're not stupid, and I have a really important surgery today so just tell me where they are.  I know you know." He revealed your head from under the blankets and started nuzzling around your face, his voice vibrating off your skin, making you giggle. 

"I don't know, you weirdo." You leaned into the soft kisses he was pressing against your neck, sinking your fingers into his hair. 

"You're lying." A kiss to your lips. 

"And how would you know that?" 

"Because, darlin', I know every inch of you, I can tell when you're lying." His hands slid under the blankets now, dancing his fingers down your arms, and you jumped at the coolness of his fingers against your skin. 

"If-if you know everything inch of me, how could you miss...THIS?!" You teased, tugging down the blankets in one swoop and revealing your body, and your yellow-striped-sock-covered-feet.

"You..." Leonard teased, growling before nearly attacking you with a kiss, setting fire to your skin. 

And before you could stop him he was pulling at the socks on your feet, and you were sent into a fit of giggles.  You screeched as his hands roughly slid up your legs, having freed your feet from the socks, and reached your upper body, pinning your wrists to the bed.  

"You are so going to pay for that, darlin'."

“Lass?  Lass?  Y/N?” A hand smoothing down your spine. 

You struck out, connecting with something soft and hearing a quiet “oof”. 

Springing your eyes open, you saw Scotty, a hand pressed to his arm. 

“Scotty?” Your voice scratched at your throat. 

“Aye.” He rubbed his arm.

“Did I hit you?” You sat up on your elbows a bit. 

“No worries, lassie.”

Moving to the edge of the bed, you touched your toes to the ground, focusing on the feeling of the steady floor beneath your feet.  You weren’t drowning.  You were okay. 

Then, a voice.  You weren’t sure if it was Scotty’s or your own. 

“It’s time.” 

His name was the last thing on your lips before the world went black.

“Leonard.”

You met Scotty’s sad gaze. 

The force it took to tilt your head into a nod was unimaginable. 

So don't call me baby Unless you mean it Don't tell me you need me If you don't believe it So let me know the truth Before I dive right into you

"Don't say that."

"Say what?" 

"That you love me."

"Why not?"

"Because of your face."

"My face?"

"You look so serious."

"So?"

"It means you mean it."

"I do mean it."

"Well that's not good."

"Why not?"

"Because I love you, too."

Every step next to Scotty was excruciating.  His hand on your lower back was basically the only thing keeping you upright. 

Then, the room, too white, always too white, too clean, too familiar.  A figure in the bed, too silent, too peaceful, too still, too familiar.    

A shiver went down your spine, the cool wind rustling the treetops stung your soaked skin.  A gray form was splayed out on the beach.

“Leonard.”

You fell next to him, somehow making it onto a chair, somehow not falling to your knees as you took his hand, as his fingers didn’t close around yours.

You leaned in, resting your head on Leonard’s chest, praying to hear anything, any sign of life.

His breathing was even and steady, his heart was beating, not as strong as the the day before, or the day before that, or the day before that.  

Your heart was beating, not as strong as the day before, or the day before that, or the day before that.  You wondered if it’d stop today.

“You stupid idiot.  Why did you have to make me love you?” You spoke to an empty room, to empty ears. 

“Because this would be a hell of a lot easier if I didn’t love you.” Tears created crevices on your cheeks. 

“But I do.” You smiled. 

“See my face? This is my serious face.”

You leaned in close, touching your nose to his. 

“Tell me what to do!  I need you to tell me what to do!”

A kiss to his unconscious lips. 

“I need you, Leonard.”

A knock.  

A twig snapping.

A sympathetic gaze. 

Dark forms appear deep in the forest. 

Panic.  This was not happening again. 

Fear flashed over your skin and you ran your fingers over his chest, pressing down as hard as you could, trying to get blood moving, is that what you're supposed to do?

"Wake up!  Please wake up!" Hot tears dripping down your cheeks. 

“Wake up, Leonard.  I need you.”

A buzzing made you lift your head and you realized that the doctor was talking to you, explaining what was going to happen.  It was like it was another language.  

Monitors were being shut off, wires disconnected, a curtain pulled back.  You were drowning. 

You curled closer to him as a dark form loomed over you. 

“Please, Leonard, come back to me.”

Then, he wasn’t connected to anything anymore.  He looked like him.  Like he was sleeping  

And then you were alone. 

Beep.  Beep.  A heartbeat. 

I could fall or I could fly Here in your aeroplane

"I don't deserve a second chance, I know."

"That's the problem.  You do."

Beep.  Beep. 

I could live, I could die Hanging on the words you say

"You have bewitched me, body and soul..."

"That's from Pride and Prejudice."

"Doesn't make it any less true."

Beep.  Beep. 

I've been known to give my all And lie awake, every day

"You did all this?  For me?"

"Oh, darlin', have you not been paying attention at all?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Anything."

"What-?"

"I would do anything for you."

Don't know how much I can take

"Come back to me."

Beep. 

-Thanks for reading!  I hope you liked it!-

---

I'm tryna put you in the worst mood, ah

P1 cleaner than your church shoes, ah

Milli point two just to hurt you, ah

All red Lamb’ just to tease you, ah

None of these toys on lease too, ah

Made your whole year in a week too, yah

Main bitch out your league too, ah

Side bitch out of your league too, ah

“Jim, where the hell are you going?” Bones called after his friend as the younger man bounced to the front door of the apartment with a wave.

“I’ve got plans,” Jim flipped around with a broad smile. “I’ll leave her in your capable hands, Bones,” Jim gestured at the room as he opened the door.

“When are you coming back?” Bones followed his friend out the door into the hall.

“I should be back tomorrow sometime,” Jim said with a wink.

“Wouldn’t you rather bring her back here? I can go somewhere else, if you want,” Bones jerked a thumb over his shoulder as he chased Jim down the hall to the turbolift.

“Don’t worry about it,” Jim clapped his friend on the shoulder as they paused to wait for the lift. “Go out, find yourself a girl of your own. Hell, go find two. Have a party.”

The door to the turbolift swished open and Jim backed into the small compartment. Bones stayed on the landing, watching.

“Jim, I swear to God, don’t do anything stupid.”

“Where would you get that idea?” Jim grinned devilishly at the doctor as the door swished shut. “Champagne’s in the fridge!”

Jim leaned back against the cool wall of the lift, letting his bag fall from his shoulder, the strap catching on his wrist leaving the knapsack dangling in midair. The world passed by out the window as he flew closer and closer to the ground before suddenly the world disappeared altogether as the lift came to a stop on the parking level.

Crossing the garage he rounded the corner and stepped up to his new, shining bike. He ran his hand along the crisp leather of the seat before slinging his leg over the vehicle. It nearly killed him to find a bike with wheels these days; the wheelless versions were more highly sought after.

He emerged into the bright light of the morning and took off at twice the speed limit to the exit for the freeway. The wind tore through his hair, a delightful change from the stillness of the air on his ship.

The landing pad unfolded to his left, a series of shuttles parked next to each other ready to ferry anybody anywhere. He peeled off the freeway and sidled up to the front gate before powering the bike off and handing the keys to an attendant.

“Take care of this for me, it’s new,” he smiled at the kid and placed his hand on the registry panel.

“Captain Kirk,” the man on the other side of the terminal looked brightly up at Jim. “Your shuttle is at the end of this row, Gate 8,” he gestured down the row of shuttles. “Do you have any other luggage that you need us to take care of?”

“No, I think I can handle this, thanks,” Jim waved at the man and made his way between the shuttles to the end of the row. The muscles in his thighs still stretched sorely with each step. He consulted a map when he got back to the Enterprise and realized that he and Bones had run the better part of two kilometers before leaping off the cliff. Considering they weren’t planning on running the whole distance, it was a miracle they both made it.

Jim hopped up the steps of the shuttle and stowed his backpack over his seat. Buckling himself in, he tilted his head back against the seat and waited for the shuttle to take off.

Every day a ***** try to test me, ah

Every day a ***** try to end me, ah

Pull off in that Roadster SV, ah

Pockets overweight, gettin' hefty, ah

Coming for the king, that's a far cry, ah

I come alive in the fall time, I

No competition, I don't really listen

I’m in the blue Mulsanne bumping New Edition

His childhood home looked so small in the midst of the vast Iowan countryside. A tiny black car sat out front. The garage no longer stood next to the house. That meant that the last of George’s vehicles were gone.

Jim walked up the driveway with one hand in his pocket and one on the strap of his backpack. As he got closer he saw the curtains move in the living room window.

Taking a deep breath, Jim watched the front door burst open and Frank come barreling out onto the front stoop.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing here?” Frank hollered, shaking with rage on the step.

Jim glanced back to the living room window and saw his mom’s eye appear through the crack in the curtains.

“I’m here to see my mom,” Jim called.

“You’re not welcome here, get the hell off my property,” Frank shouted, lowering himself down a stair.

“This is my mom’s property, too, last I checked,” Jim looked squarely at Frank, trying to keep his posture casual even though the bottom of his stomach tied itself in a knot, remembering the impact he received the last time he and Frank spoke.

“I call the goddamn shots around here,” Frank jumped down the last few stairs and hurtled towards Jim with his fists clenched, “and I said: ‘Get the hell of my property.’”

“I want to talk to my mother,” Jim reiterated, holding himself stiffly as Frank stuck his face inches from Jim’s. Jim could see the spit strings between Frank’s teeth as the man kept yelling.

“You think just because you’re a fancy Captain now you can just waltz right in here? This is trespassing, dumbass, I’m gonna have you arrested if you don’t get off my property right this goddamn second -”

“I’d like to see you try,” Jim made the mistake of saying.

Frank’s fist connected with his gut quicker than he could register it coming. Jim doubled over, lowering his hand from his pack and clutching at his stomach, trying to yank his hand from his pocket to defend himself from the next swing which landed straight on his temple. Jim fell to his knees, his backpack falling from his shoulder onto the dusty ground.

“Stop!” Jim heard his mother’s voice through the rushing of blood in his ears. He looked up through blurred eyes as his mother’s hands appeared around Frank’s body, pulling the large man back from Jim.

“Mom…” Jim croaked.

“Jim, get the hell out of here, for God’s sake!” Winona looked down at him with wide, scared eyes. “Go, just go.”

Jim opened his mouth to say something but thought better of it. He put his palms on the driveway and pushed himself up, collecting his bag as Winona pushed Frank back into the house.

As the door shut, Jim turned his back and walked back down the driveway, slinging his bag over his shoulder and stuffing his hand back in his pocket.

Let a ***** Brad Pitt

Legend of the fall took the year like a bandit

Bought mama a crib and a brand new wagon

Now she hit the grocery shop looking lavish

Star Trek roof in that Wrath of Khan

Girls get loose when they hear this song

100 on the dash get me close to God

We don't pray for love, we just pray for cars

Jim looked down at the phone in his hand. Hell if he was leaving Iowa without letting his mom know why he came in the first place.

He flipped the phone open and selected her private line, the one he knew Frank didn’t know about. It went straight to voicemail, as he expected.

“Mom, it’s me,” he started after the tone. “Look, I know it was a bad idea to come by the house, but I wanted to see you. I didn’t see you at the ceremony, and I wanted to make sure you were alright.

“Anyway, um, I’ve got something for you,” Jim went on, “Dad wasn’t Captain long enough for you to know, but our salary’s pretty good. I’ve got an account open for you. I want you to have what’s in it. It’s not what you deserve, I don’t think even an Admiral could make that much, but it’s enough for you to… well. If you want to get out of there, you can.

“I’ve got a place in San Francisco now. I won’t be there often, but it’s nice. It’s a penthouse, can you imagine that?” he asked with a sad laugh. “If you want it, it’s yours. I have a car, too, and a bike.”

Jim touched his stomach gingerly, checking to keep tabs on the pain.

“I’m flying out of Riverside in three hours. If you want to meet up, call me. I’d love to see you before I go. I love you,” Jim pulled the phone away from his ear and ended the call. He tossed the device into the dust at his hip and curled his knees up to his chest, wrapping his arms around them and letting his head fall back against the brick.

His phone rang next to him and he hastily picked up, brushing dust from the device before putting it to his head.

“Hello?”

“Jim?” it was his mom’s quiet voice, thick with tears.

“Mom, Mom are you okay?” Jim let his knees fall to the ground, sitting up straight and away from the wall.

“Yeah, I’m okay,” she said. “Jim, why did you come back?”

“I wanted to give you -”

“That’s not a good reason, Jim,” Winona’s voice cracked on the other side. “You know how he feels about you, especially after you left.”

“I know it was a bad idea,” Jim said, looking down. “Did he hurt you?”

“Not really.”

“‘Not really’ or ‘No?’”

“Just don’t come back, Jim, please,” she pleaded.

“Mom…” Jim choked up, and he wiped roughly at his eyes. “Did you get my message?”

“I did,” she said. “I can’t just leave. You remember what he’s like.”

“I can have someone come to protect you. Frank’s… he’s just a goon, I can get someone from security, someone trained, to come take care of you, to keep an eye out for him -”

“Jim,” Winona said with a poor approximation of a laugh.

“Mom, please,” Jim pleaded, standing and starting to pace through the alley. “Come meet me.”

“I can’t leave now, Jim, he’s on a warpath,” Winona said softly. “He’s out back right now throwing things around, if he came back in and I was gone -”

“Then grab a few things and come,” Jim said, “I can take you back with me right now. I’ve got a place and everything -”

“I can’t, Jim, I can’t,” she breathed into the phone. “Look, maybe when he’s calmed down some. He’s been really good lately. Maybe when he’s calmed down, I can grab some things and I can come. But not now. Not when he’s so upset.”

“I don’t want him to hurt you again,” Jim whispered into the phone.

“I know, sweetie,” Winona breathed. “I promise you I want to leave. I do, really. I just want to do it quietly.”

Jim looked at the ground, stopping in his tracks. He listened to his mom breathe heavily on the other side of the phone.

“You know where to find the account. Just show them your ID and you’ll have full access to all of it. I put more in every time I get paid. It’s all yours. My place, too. I… I’m hoping that my crew can get this five-year mission they’re talking about. I might be off-planet for a really long time. It’s all yours. Everything I have,” Jim took a deep, rattling breath, “I made a will -”

“Stop,” Winona snapped. “Stop… I don’t want to hear about that.”

“You’re sure you won’t come to see me, anyway?” Jim looked up at the darkening sky. “I’m just down the road by the store.”

“I can’t, Jim,” Winona said. “I’ll let you know when I’m on my way.”

“I really hope it’s soon,” Jim whispered. “I love you, Mom.”

“I love you, too, Jim. So much.”

The line went dead and Jim let his hand fall to his side.

House so empty, need a centerpiece

Twenty racks a table cut from ebony

Cut that ivory into skinny pieces

Then she clean it with her face man I love my baby

You talking money, need a hearing aid

You talking 'bout me, I don't see a shade

Switch up my style, I take any lane

I switch up my cup, I kill any pain

Look what you've done

I'm a motherfuckin' starboy

The San Francisco night oozed possibility. Jim knew his crew would be out having a good time on their first night back, first day of shore leave, and he knew he ought to be having a good one, too.

He took two more shots in quick succession, letting the warmth hit him hard and numb his limbs for a split second before the burn set in.

He growled at the sensation but it brought a small smile to his face.

As he opened his eyes, he looked across the bar at the woman watching him. She shot him a small smile and tipped her head to the side suggestively. Jim watched as her eyes shifted to the side for a moment and an identical woman slid into the chair next to her. They had a soft cascade of gills going down the sides of their necks, terminating at the plunging necks of their dresses.

Jim raised an eyebrow and slid out of his bar stool, sidling carefully around the bar, checking his pace with each step. He was wobbly, but he could manage. After the half bottle of rye he polished off, he needed something to cool him down.

“Ladies, this seat taken?” he gestured at the stool next to them.

“By all means, Captain,” the woman closest to him crooned.

“Oh please, call me Jim,” he grinned, feeling the anxiety in his stomach start to unwind. As long as he could keep himself occupied, his worries could wait another night.

“Jim,” the other woman said with a sultry pursing of her lips as she left her chair and nestled herself in next to him. “You look lonely over there.”

“You have no idea,” he drawled as he let a hand explore around her waist.

“We were wondering,” she exchanged a look with her counterpart, “Our sister’s having a party at our apartment and now we have nowhere to go.”

“I think I might be able to find you some alternate arrangements,” he grinned. “Now tell me, I feel like I’ve seen you before…”

The women giggled.

“First year navigation,” the seated woman said. “We formally met at Cranston’s Halloween party.”

“Right,” Jim said, bouncing a finger off the hip of the woman in his arm.

“We’d be very grateful for some help tonight,” the woman leaned down and murmured in Jim’s ear. “Those kinds of parties don’t really do it for us anymore.”

“I know the feeling,” Jim eased himself out of his chair and looped his arms over the ladies’ shoulders. “Please, right this way.”

--

When Jim flipped the lights on in his apartment he was shocked to find everything exactly where he’d left it, save for a folded slip of paper on the coffee table.

“We’re just going to go freshen up,” one of the women giggled. “Where’s your bathroom?”

“Just down from the kitchen,” he grinned, pointing.

As the women bounced off together down the hall, Jim picked up the note.

Please call me when you get back from wherever the hell it is you went. I’m worried about you. - Bones

Jim pressed his lips together and folded the note tightly. Padding to the kitchen, he opened the fridge and found the untouched champagne bottle in the door. He grabbed it and pulled three flutes from a cabinet overhead. Slowly, he stepped through the quiet apartment turning the lights on and settling in the bedroom.