#trans!headcanons

anyway, as the three of them have appeared working together alone on cases, sonny would just one day drop the invite to the both of them. although rafael and amanda have known each other for awhile now, they aren't close. but fuck it, they like sonny enough and know how much their friendship means to him, and well. they did like the energy and sass the other person gave. eventually, this routine becomes a thing for them, unwinding together, playing card and board games (because i think sonny would also have those). and through all these conversations with each other, i think there's no way the three of them wouldn't have slipped some tidbit of themselves that imply the fact they're not cis (e.g. sonny telling a long story, but in one small unrelated line reveals that he was in his school's basketball team. but he has forgotten that in another occasion, he had mentioned there was ONLY a girls basketball team in his school). these small details are unmissable, considering the nature of their jobs requiring them to pick these small things up, and well, when you're trans you just have this sense ANYWAY.... but they won't mention it to each other. it's just something they think and speculate in their heads alone.

ok so... how do things get spicy? sexual tension build up. come on, the way rafael looked at amanda and sonny when he first met them in their respective first meetings... i'm sure the three find each other attractive. and like tbh, not sure if you do these with your friends, but i know me and my friends love to have active discussions about our sex lives and preferences... LMFAO. so i think they just start yapping about this while being tipsy and learn WAYYY too much info about each other, which then turns them on and feel even more attracted to each other. they artistically talk about it without revealing their transgenderism ofc. idk i just personally feel like these three would be stealth out of safety reasons in their jobs, you know. i think the threesome starts off as a joke. like they have kissed each other for the shits and giggles, because what homies don't kiss.... *eye twitching*

ok so the idea is that they were discussing about what they WANT to try in bed but haven't had the chance to. coincidentally, rafael and sonny mention about wanting to try a threesome IN GENERAL, as a concept. amanda, being the goddess she is, of course had one before. they egg amanda to share more about how it went and this only intrigues rafael and sonny EVEN more.

i like to think that amanda is the one who suggests it, saying something teasing like 'hmm i wonder what it would be like with two hot men instead...' while looking at them suggestively—because her prior threesome experience was with two women. in which rafael and sonny have their each internal panic, because shit.... now what. sure, they had their '🤨🏳️‍⚧️❓' moments towards each other, but unfortunately, you can never be certain on how someone would react to you coming out. so alas, it has to be finally addressed. feel like sonny would be the one who blurts out nervously like FUCKIHAVESOMETHINGTOTELLYOUGUYS .... and then finally drops the bomb and they're like oh.... so..... and then they finally come out to each other and there's an awkward moment of silence. until someone finally chimes: 'so... are we still doing this or nah?' and the subsequent 'fuck yes i'm down if you two are' '....into it even more than previously, i have to admit...'

- tbh my fav timeline for trans!sonny is like in his late teens because then it gets mixed with all the ANGST. like when you have a religious upbringing you tend to start questioning when you're older and especially once you get exposed to the Outside world

- was in HEAVYYYY DENIAL about him being trans. countless of prayers and breakdowns, desperately asking for the feelings to go away because it makes his life and relationships so much more complicated

- he started on low dose testosterone without telling any of his family members because he didn't know how to break the news. he's heard some bad things from people at church about transgender people so he's EXTRA worried how everyone would react to him coming out BUT he literally could not stand looking at himself without feeling insanely dysphoric.

- when his voice starts dropping noticably they ask him questions like "are you sick, kid? you got a cold?" and he's just like... "yeah...? 😀"

- he definitely had like BAD acne from starting testosterone at first but because he had so many sisters, they taught him how to take care of his skin.... so hence he doesn't have too many breakouts or scars

- also he SMELLS!!!!!! literally sooo damn stinky and it doesn't help that he gets stupidly sweaty. doesn't realise how bad it was until his sisters started pointing it out. only THEN does he start taking his hygiene seriously

- he does testosterone shots into his thigh but he's SO anxious about it. has a full proper routine that he follows strictly and keeps his stuff neatly in a case. his pain tolerance is low so he has to ice his thigh and warm up the testosterone vial to make it less painful. also, he buys kids plasters with like superheros, cool hotwheel cars or firefrucks on them as a small reward for being brave!!!!

- historically, he had more girlfriends (even pre-transition, he had always been bisexual). but only as he started to grow into himself and age, he started to date a few men but it never went well for him :-/ (UNTIL he meets rafael ofc xx rafael the best boyfriend ever)

- unfortunately, he dabbled into the pipeline of playing into the horrible cis straight man persona because he wanted to pass off as stealth for safety reasons. he had always wanted to be part of the justice system, but knew it's going to be TOUGH trying to blend in. this phase lasts for a LONG time because he got way too locked in...... but eventually he gets out of this Mindset (or at least... tries his best)

- buys those products CLEARLY just marketed to men's simple brains despite being horrible products.... like 2-in-1 shampoo, MENS facial wash, deodorant etc. and it's such a bad habit. when he gets together with rafael, rafael nearly collapses when he sees the products sonny uses in his bathroom....

- that early season 16 moustache was him trying to see if people would take him more seriously as a man with facial hair (the answer is no, obviously... because many people are not a fan of it. I AM THOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!)

ALSO i had saved this tiktok i LOVEDDDD and usually leave a link to the actual video to give traffic to the original creator but i think they deleted their account because i couldn't find it <//33 but it's so good ugh it hit my feelings that i need you to also see it