#tosikowrites

Koito

Making Koito blush is as easy as shelling pears. He is expressive, infantile, ready to respond to praise and criticism with a thick blush accompanied by high-pitched monkey screeching at any time of the day. It's funny that it doesn't really matter how many times you compliment Koito, he will still break into a smug smile, his cheeks turned crimson, with no sign of getting used to such pleasant and yet truthful words! Rating him 12 out of 10 for carrying his heart on his sleeve, he deserves a big smooch on the forehead.

Canonically blushes at cute things so put him in name plays with puppies while answering questions for better visualization. Keeps a happy face after the kitty cat gives him scars all over his adorable face and leaves Koito without his luxurious eyebrows. Would blush at the sight of not only domesticated animals but also owls, raccoons, foxes, flying squirrels… all of them except wild cats.

Obviously, Koito blushes at any semi-romantic and romantic affection especially from people who he values. I mean if he doesn't pass out the same moment when you stealthy take him by the little finger, you’ll have to wait until Koito calms down and turns his face back to you. At the same time, you’ll need to wait even longer until the ability to form sentences from the words returns to him all together. Get used to Satsuma dialect, honey. Also, did you know that the Satsuma dialect was used as a method of cryptographic communication in World War II?

Sugimoto

Somewhere in the middle between uwu good boy Koito and absolute impassive catastrophe named Ogata. Too cool to be constantly flustered but has his beautiful moments of weakness Sugimoto tries to hide them under the shade of his cap or in the fabric of a checkered scarf. There are not many people who are allowed to see his soft side but it exists.

Mostly blushes in clearly stupid embarrassing situations because he can’t stand being not god-like Sugimoto the Immortal but a young man facing his dum-dum personality. Red as a lobster after falling on the street, losing a bet he was sure he was right in, etc.

Could a couple of glasses of alcohol also cause his red cheeks? Yeah, probably. Certain genetic traits in alcohol metabolism cause Asians to get drunk faster (and face worse hangover after a night out) therefore it doesn’t take much for Sugimoto to booze up to funny twinkles lightening up in his eyes.

Blushing mess in the crash phase of the relationship. This is the obvious one but has to be mentioned for integrity.

Ogata

The only person on the list who’s incapable of blushing because of positive emotions. I wouldn’t be surprised if the otter meat situation was the very first time he got red-faced, honestly. Does he even blush in everyday life? Again, I feel like he would only during sex times and only when he is submissive/bottoming/not controlling the situation since it’s the most vulnerable position

Red when he publicly fails in mastery Ogata is a recognized professional – sharp-shooting. It is difficult to imagine how humiliating it is for such a sniper to miss the target. Holy shit, in case of a really stupid mistake, he may think about eliminating unfortunate witnesses.

◖ KOITO OTONOSHIN ◗

Let’s start with Koito. First of all, he got no dating experience whatsoever. In high school, he managed to alienate a potential girlfriend with one tasteless phrase (OR he invited her to a ridiculously expensive restaurant and made her pay for herself <3) and never learned from his mistakes. There’s also an entrenched idea in his head that relationship is obliged to be exceptionally passionate and beautiful like a frame from Christophe Honoré’s films. Is he willing to make it that way? Well…

Falling head over heels, Koito decides to approach his crush unceremoniously playing a romantic blitzkrieg on them. Yes, love-bombing while treating them as they are already his girlfriend/boyfriend. Since he a priori does not care about the number of ones and zeros after the minus sign in a popup from the bank so Koito buys them the world. World of exhibitions of underground artists, candlelight and vintage Champaign nights, sparkly bracelets and gold cufflinks, leatherbound classics, and silk sheets. His love sounds like That’s what I like by Bruno Mars and while he likes you your life turns into a sugar baby life trial. I don’t mean it in a gentlemanly way, don’t get me wrong: Koito is still apathetic to their wishes and does his deeds because he’s confident this approach works for everyone. Yall, he’s blindfolded by his own imagination and wide green banknote yet his emotional maturity is poor.

As soon as his partner shows any willfulness, Koito is taken aback and offended. No worries, even if he tries to be independent, cold, or passive-aggressive, his façade breaks into pieces due to his desire to be loved and cared for. He doesn't have enough anger inside him to throw tantrum and his heart is too big to be a jerk. Reluctantly, Koito dives into videos on healthy relationships, short pop-science articles on psychology, annoys more-than-done Tsukishima quoting them later in their face. No, he is not directly admitting his fault. But the fact that Koito is trying to change is a huge gesture.

One word. C l i n g y. If he can’t get a stupid couple of t-shirts for the White day, WHAT IS THE POINT? They can’t escape having matching userpics on Twitter either. Sweet too. Always considers calling a taxi when nasty weather catches them outside and if not, he will meet them with a strict black umbrella and a blinding smile on his face. Ah, nobody is immune to puppy eyes. Koito will use it at any opportunity, especially when he feels all cuddly and needs an extra kiss on his big stupid forehead. I can see him acting over the top flamboyant right until they take the initiative making him stutter in Satsuma.

For their free time, Koito chooses a setting where his hand can accidentally brush against theirs multiple times… If he is in the mood to learn, he chooses something like a joint pottery lesson. In a minute Koito gets sticky clay all over his shirt and cheeks but them wiping it for him counteracts the urge to roll his eyes and drop everything. Another one would be going out to the contact zoo where you can pet pinky-snout mini-pigs and shelter a meerkat on your shoulder. Koito might even not be interested in playing with animals but watching them feeding mischievous raccoon of the hand and giving him happy smile makes Otonoshin’s heart waver in excitement.

◖ TSUKISHIMA HAJIME ◗

On god, you are the one that has to pursue Tsukishima, not the other way around. In this sense, he resembles a slimy eel that will be avoiding catching feelings at all costs until there will be no choice but to give in. His silence is the first obstacle. When his future partner wants to initiate small talk, they’ll have to fight constant calls from his superiors and at the same time Tsukishima’s taciturn nature. He is… observing. Maybe, it’s a prank? Waste of time? Scam? No matter how much Koito spins in a shiny cheerleader’s form (figuratively, of course) yelling words of encouragement, this man takes things painfully slow. Tsukishima doesn’t surrender until the very last minute when their lips meet and the relationship officially moves from being just friends to being a couple.

Dry texter. However! He texts his partner every day. When the day comes to an end and he finally changes into his favorite grey sweatpants and two-thousand-year-old t-shirt (it probably witnessed a murder and whatever Tsukishima did back in the days…), he sits down and texts them few words. Hey. How are you? How was your day? Mine was ok. Twenty minutes of silence. Meme. Probably, not the best one. Probably, from Ogata or Usami. Whatever. He is the man who sees a paragraph with ten questions and answers only the last one, okay? Good thing Tsukishima compensates for it by being a good listener and guiding a conversation in real life. Will send you unsolicited photos of cute animals and copy your style of texting.

He grew out of a thrilling period of wet palms and flushed cheeks a long time ago. Tsukishima seems comfortable with all types of physical affection if they keep it private. In a relationship with him, a clear line is drawn between sexual and non-sexual nudity, which makes intimacy so natural. For example, with a tube big enough, Tsukishima playfully dares them to take a bath with him. While the water is overflowing, small rainbow bubbles rise and burst, he gets on his knees to wash their hair with a soft, barely noticeable smile on chapped lips. Since any water procedures in Tsukishima's life turn into a multilayer ritual, sharing this experience with another person means to let them dangerously close.

Conflicts most often occur on the basis of oh my lord how can you live like this (read - household habits) and sudden emotional closeness. If we speak about the first one, Tsukishima has been single for at least five years so he had plenty of time to live how he wants. Eating nothing but instant noodles for three days while sink remains undetectable even with new military radar under the mountains of dirty plates is okay. Just like wearing the same pair of pants for a week or leaving bottles of shampoo opened. He has a famous one, 13 in 1, that you can wash your head, coat, and car with. Needless to say, changing him is a bit of a pipe dream.

◖ KOITO OTONOSHIN ◗

Yes, we can’t leave out the fact Koito is a sweet boy born with a silver spoon in his mouth. His daddy made sure that worldly problems didn't bother his son at all and if Otonoshin wants anything, he’ll get it in a blink of an eye. Half of the year Koito spends in Sapporo, enjoying a two-story light-filled apartment in Chuo district (yes, modern one, with a king-size bed, huge bathroom, and great city-view) and the second half he is basking on the sandy shores of Kagoshima. Well, sometimes he has to work from his father's luxury cottage. His credit card opens all the doors of life for him. Although Koito has studied in Japan (like Keio or Waseda Business School), he has also received a master's degree at some American university (would Stern Business School in NY match Keio? Idk). Travels when the chance comes, especially loves South East Asia, had a fun time in Madagascar and Iceland. If he had friends, he would have joined the frat boy society, but so far, Koito only has overwhelming anxiety that the people he admires hate him. Daddy fixed him a good job in Tsurumi’s company to save him from the temptation to spend all his fortune in five years.

Due to westernization Koito most likely doesn’t fit into the Japanese code of conduct, no wonder that people think he is an upstart. While he has no problem being looked upon with a mockery in the eyes it still leaves an imprint on his relationships with people (it is unlikely that he ever had a close friend). The magic of the Internet gave him many acquaintances around the globe and a load of postcards from every corner of the planet that Otonoshin puts on the wide corkboard in his room. Thanks to this, he is quite informed in terms of foreign cultures, which does not prevent him from behaving like an uneducated idiot now and then.

As Tsurumi's protégé, Koito strives to match his reputed grandeur: salarymen exchange expressive looks when theirs superior takes off black leather gloves just like Tokushirou does. It's in his look, in his speech, in the food he chooses, and in the clothes he wears. Most are annoyed by his copycat behavior. Not Tsukishima tho, he simply doesn’t care and is not out of condescension to the youth. After detecting the lowest level of judgment in the office, Koito promoted him to his assistant and a friend, God knows which position is more challenging. Once Koito stated that they are friends, Tsukishima had no other choice but to sigh and introduce Otonoshin to the world of pants with three stripes, cheap beer, and regular visits to the Super-Tamade. The cultural shock shakes Koito like an earthquake.

In addition to his busy life as an errand boy - he is constantly thrown from one department to another in order to gain experience - Koito is one of Tsurumi's confidants at meetings with the yakuza. He is one of the people stalked by Usami. The latter even tried to befriend Koito but they ... how to say ... didn't get along. Speaking of others, Koito had a chance to work with Ogata (family photoshoot), Tanigaki (private wrestling lessons), Sugimoto (interviewed him for the company). Some of the above-mentioned personalities slashed the tires in Koito's car and he still does not know who has done it.

Has a low alcohol tolerance. One shot and Koito is spilling his guts like his drinking buddy got a psychotherapist’s license. You’re about to enter a Dr. Phil episode. He also becomes incredibly tactile and tries to paw over everyone within a radius of 20 meters. Almost broke his spine trying to lift Tsukishima up. After a couple of shots, Koito himself unbuttoned two upper buttons on Tanigaki's shirt. Told Sugimoto that he is not as big of a dipshit as he previously thought, got hit in the eye, laughed, and paid for everybody’s drinks afterward. Any big binge ends with a recreation of The Hangover, where Koito wakes up with an empty credit card and hickeys in the most unusual places.

◖ KIKUTA MOKUTAROU ◗

Kikuta has a reputation of a nobleman, kind and generous, who is famous in small circles of people just like him. He looks… normal, you wouldn’t give him a second thought if you met him on the street. Works as a private detective so he can be a boss of his own but in fact, Kikuta is another one of Tsurumi's bloodhounds. Your typical patient at high risk of developing obstructive chronic pulmonary disease because of excessive smoking. Seeing him with a cigarette between the teeth is as natural as a cold winter in Hokkaido. In the comfort of his own home, Kikuta allows himself to smoke a fine cigar that smells like dark chocolate. Expensive shit. Sugimoto gave Kikuta a silver lighter for the birthday with his initials engraved on the edges. By the way, they are in an uncle–nephew type of relationship and when money’s tight Sugimoto can rely on the old man.

Some people play the guitar as a hobby, some choose to wake up at 3 a.m. to fish in still water but Kikuta has chosen to purchase antics and resell them to more discerning collectors. He has a separate room (personal office) where the best monuments are kept. It’s Asirpa’s favorite room too! She never misses the chance to poke some old vases when Sugimoto brings her over for a cup of tea. Their visits give Kikuta a chance to shower Sugimoto with homemade food and Asirpa with candies and animal plushies.  Sugimoto, Asirpa, and Ariko are his family, not by blood, but by spirit. Of course, he has a very harmonious relationship with Ariko (he often has to communicate with this particular pathologist): they are both quite introverted, so they are used to staying away from the crowd together, enjoying deep conversations, and sharing thoughts without the need to hold back a single word. They can often be seen in some secluded corner, smoking and watching the moon drifting in the cloudy night sky

Once upon a time, he got tired of drinking plain cognac and Kikuta decided to learn how to mix cocktails. Anyone over the age of 21 who crosses the porch of his house after 6 pm is met with an offer to get them something delicious to drink. Despite the lack of specialized training or high-quality equipment and/or alcohol, Kikuta mixes excellent highball cocktails that hit the brains with the power of a gong-striking monk. He can handle alcohol well so he gets the honor of taking his inebriated friends home.

Again, he is not the most social person around, Kikuta prefers to spend evenings within the walls of his own home. He has a tensely friendly relationship with Tsurumi and his minions. Few times he had to work with Usami, running various risky scams for the yakuza: for a very long time Kikuta tried to convince Usami to return to a normal life, enroll in uni, and live as everyone else does, but the attempts were unsuccessful (Usami was extremely hostile to the idea, to Kikuta, almost threw a tantrum like I'm already an adult, I can decide what I want to do in life do blah blah blah). It seems to me that Kikuta might be the only person who slowly but surely draws Ogata into a conversation about this erroneous vicious nonsense in his head. Over a cup of coffee, on a bench in the park, anywhere and in any way through long-winded conversations (Hannibal-style dialogues, you feel me?). Maybe he dreamed of becoming a psychotherapist in the past, who knows.

It is in Ogata's nature to keep any of his relationships a secret, be it work, friendship, or romantic relationship. Most of his fellow photographers keep wondering what is between him and Tanaka, does he hang out with the Rin who is just as big asshole as Ogata is, with whom he is at enmity and whom he kisses in the evenings. Good girls like bad guys so everybody just assumes Hyakunosuke enjoys numerous affairs and seduces girls left and right. Since his behavior does not change a bit even after his significant other enters his life and Ogata keeps his mouth shut about personal stuff, they have to be ready to stay low. He won’t take them out to meet the guys in the ramen shop and he won’t brag about them online. No photos posted online, no cryptic messages and gentle hints. If they try to resist forced anonymity, Ogata will hush them down: do you want to be in a secret relationship or no relationship at all?

Oh, also, it is his favorite phrase when it comes to openness of any kind. Conversations about feelings, experiences, expectations are so rare that they were added to IUCN Red List under the critically endangered category. As long as they allow this phrase to stop them from straight talk Ogata will use it and hiding deeper and deeper in his shell. The moment they say no thanks <3 to the apparent manipulation and allow themself to step on the tail of this mischievous cat his brain stops fucking working. Because. Wow. It didn’t work. Somebody dares to go against his word and it feels like be the biggest asshole challenge.

Doesn’t like to be bothered during his work (he is soooo busy as a photographer, you know), however, his loved one quickly becomes his favorite model. As if under a microscope, he examines their perfect imperfections through the camera lens focusing on parted lips, color gradient on the iris, tiny moles barely visible on the skin, soft outlines of the back muscles… In their naturalness lies raw beauty that needs no vulgar retouch. Ogata most definitely revels in being allowed to enjoy it in fullness.

Ogata always sighs softly as he walks past the liquor department. Why, you ask? One day he and his significant other kind of went overboard with beer and wine that they had to face their drunken personas. And to everyone's surprise, Ogata is way more pleasant to be around when he gets a little screwed up! Barely turning his tongue, he confidently calls his beloved all types of pet names and places their hand on his bristled cheek for a gentle caressing. You can do practically anything with him meeting no resistance. He is so mushy and giddy you’d want to put him out the door and ask to return the usual grumbler.

Kikuta

Watching Kikuta falling for someone is a comedy in three acts in a sense he can’t afford to put someone in jeopardy only because his poor heart craves warmth and affection. The urge to slap himself grows stronger the clearer his inopportune crush becomes: as if laughing at him, fate brings a man and his love together time after time. So there is no way for Kikuta to ignore his sweaty palms and flushed cheeks the moment they enter the sight.

This man has a full-blown conversation going on in his head while trying to keep his composure and, well, that’s the secret of how he keeps the poker face on. Calm, collected, courteous. However, this feigned modesty can be easily dispelled by a good compliment. In response to it, Kikuta screws his eyes like a cat that was scratched behind the ear and lets out a short chuckle. Their attention removes the burden of the image of a hardened warrior from his shoulder and kind of throws him back to the days when he met Sugimoto and fed a young vagrant boy a bowl of rice. Maybe, there is still hope for him.

At first, he tries to take them over with classic (albeit sophisticated) bragging, talking about the past war, victories and defeats, his personal views on the matter of life and death, and other things that can immerse themself in thought. Taking them arm-in-arm in a European manner Kikuta can spend hours talking with enthusiasm about whatever has to impress them. If it doesn’t happen, he gets embarrassed but quickly comes to his senses and tries to understand what interests them instead.

Lives for cheesy relationship stuff like warm their hands in his own or romantic awful puns. Every such moment is the result of a struggle between do I want to be a gentleman or do I want to be a clown but a clown with a date. If you get carried away with a serious conversation, you’ll awaken a grumpy old man in Kikuta and get a free lecture on the topic of his choice.

Best at smoothing things over and finding compromises. You could be the most lost person in the world and Kikuta could help you out of the dark place. He is soothing like a balm and sounds of the sounds of ocean waves crashing against the shore. First of all, he tries to be a good friend and companion and even if his crush never finds its way to become an actual relationship, they will have a person to rely on in the future.

 Ariko

But if we talk about Ariko? He does not know how to hide his feelings at all and his crush is obvious to everyone. The whole kotan knows whom he had fallen in love with and how strongly he feels about them. Even if he tried to keep the facade, this venture would completely fail in the first hour since his whole being starts vibrating differently as soon as they ask him the most common question. What time is it? The best one, the right one. At least that’s what you’d say looking at Ariko perked up and ready to impress them in every conceivable way.

Oh, he will be proud to present Ainu culture to them through narrating ancient legends and patiently explaining sacred meaning for particular items. Of course, this is a rather intimate topic but since their presence multiplied his enthusiasm tenfold, Ariko decides to go all-in. During walks in the fresh air, he unconsciously comes so close to them just to rush a couple of steps ahead once their hands brush against each other. But if they, by the chance, do take his hand, then Ipopte will not let it go until the end of their meeting.

The feeling of their closeness cannot be compared to anything so he tries to almost get drunk on it. If the situation allows Ariko will put his head on theirs or place his hand on their cheek or simply lay next to them legs tangled and fingers interlaced. The first time initiating cuddling Ariko was surprised how his heart didn’t explode. Looking closer, you could see how the carotid artery on his neck rhythmically twitched and if you listen carefully you could hear him breathing slowly and deeply to calm the hell down.

Gives a lot of small gifts. Not traditional gifts but baubles that made him think about his crush. It can be beautiful water-hewn stone from the deserted seashore or fine colored ribbon for tying your hair. He sincerely expects nothing in return for these gifts but would be flattered if his crush showed the same attention in return.

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Before the unfortunate incident with Ogata and the bear happened, Nikaidou was such a braggart both about himself and his amazing s/o. They are the best around. He is one lucky guy to have them as a partner.

His main love language was going overboard with praise and physical touch. Not a day went by without Nikaidou paying at least one sweet compliment to the subject of his adoration. In addition, his face lighted up when they praised him for anything, be it his soldier's courage or deep dark eyes. Sometimes their dialogue turned into a verbal duel over who will overcompliment whom and it could last for half of the hour until one of them just started spilling the dumbest figures of speech imaginable.

But after the incident, things changed. Now he is all distant and quiet and then in a blink of an eye manic one running around in a stupefying delirium. When the painful realization of the horrors he and his poor brother endured becomes too clear, too close, Nikaidou’s whole world shrinks to the neck of a morphine bottle.

Physical contact? Well... After another maim, it is better to refrain from touching his bare skin altogether. But when Nikaido calms down (with the help of morphine or on his own), you can try to hug him and pat him on the head. Nikaidou himself refrains from initiating anything physical since the absence of his hand leaves him feeling less of a man and makes full-fledged embrace impossible. It truly saddens him.

In general, without his wonderhat and prostheses, Nikaidou feels extremely vulnerable and any touch of the skin near the supposed location of the ear, a stump of an arm or leg burns him like a red-hot iron. It is enormously aching, but for their sake, he can ignore it for a while. Their care is a medicine that is always in abundance but he is not the most compliant patient.

Once in a blue moon, he decides to give them a gift. The last one was made by Edogai. His fancy gloves of dubious origin have no frills, but are very pleasant to the touch, solid and hard. He has a hat, they have gloves, they match perfectly!

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Quite literally friendship-emotional-rollercoaster. Becoming friends with Nikaidou is easy but maintaining this friendship requires effort. It most likely originated in cold soldiers' barracks from occasional small talk about the harshness of military life. As expected, Kouhei’s friend is Yuhei’s friend too, - find trouble, make it double, - making them a famous trio of rascals that brings nothing but distress to other soldiers.

Prior to the loss of the ear, scalp, arms, legs, brother, a good chunk of sanity Nikaidou would like to hang out almost every day, drinking, visiting geishas, sitting on the war department porch, and enjoying heated debate about the future attack. Picking on others is also one of their favorite activities. A little bit of gossiping? Yes, please. Do I need to mention they usually get to serve detention together as well.

After numerous injuries, he gets an unpleasant pulling sensation in the abdomen when the thought of losing them pops In his head. Nikaidou can afford one more limb being cut off thanks to confidence in Arisaka’s natural ingenuity but losing them? Not like they can be replaced by anyone. Moreover, they are dear to his heart because they are a living reminder of the deceased brother.

Lets them talk into the ear and translates whatever comes from it as a form of… conversation. Nikaidou looks like he is about to throw a tantrum when he once again has to work with Usami or Kikita instead of his dear friend. They are also the one Tsukishima can turn to when Lieutenant Tsurumi isn’t around and Nikaidou refuses to give up a bottle of morphine.

Friendship with him is like talking to a different person every time. He is an irrepressible optimist, a child in a crippled body, that shares frightening thoughts about capturing the Immortal Sugimoto. He is also an anxious tangle of nerves hiding from the daylight like it will burn him alive. He is also a serious veteran that will shot the enemy on the spot if they get too close to him or them.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Pick a wrong time and you’ll get to cuddle a wood log instead of a breathing human being. It is a matter of luck and good timing instead of a cute date idea with a loved one. Nikaidou, if in a playful mood, would tease his s/o pretending he has no idea what they want from him. Maybe, they want to shake his hand? Real one or a wood one? As soon as they make a move, he will crawl away with a wide snide smile on his pale face. Eventually, Nikaidou will surrender to their mercy and tight overwhelming embrace but before that happens, he will have some fun playing naïve dummy. Any other time when Nikaidou is obsessing over random idee fixe he will ignore any attempts to cuddle him and even may jump away from them like from the flame. His perception of the touch varies depending on the mood it seems.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

To keep it short, no. Nothing and no one can convince Nikaidou that he has even the slightest chance of becoming a family man. The very thought of something like this makes him burst into hysterical laughter. He is not suitable for this, it is not worth trying so broken man Nikaidou has already joined Ogata’s little I’d Rather Kick A Bucket Than Settle Down club. Mediocre in both cleaning and cooking, doesn’t need constant persuasion to do either.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Endured torment reduced the potential emotional pain to almost non-existing so it won't be difficult for Nikaidou to just leave, to cut them off for their own good. The assumption that they need to end the relationship indicates a major shifting in Nikaidou’s life (maybe, he already knows that his life will end this evening) but at this point, the break-up doesn’t seem like a significant event anymore. Heavily sedated he mutters something unintelligible and then with Arisaka’s bayonet precision cuts the rubbish and announces that they are no longer a couple, they won’t see each other, they should not look for each other under any circumstances, and walks away. No hesitation, no doubts, only humility and disconnection.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Would love to get married someday, spend the rest of his life with a loved one far away from the horrors of war and the gold hunt. However, its possibility seems so elusive and unattainable that Nikaidou decided to put this thought on the back-burner. Now his mind is preoccupied with the desire to slit Sugimoto the Immortal open so even if there is a loved one by his side Nikaidou is highly unlikely to propose. Any hints and mentions of the wedding fly into one ear and fly out of the other.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Nikaidou began to appreciate moments of vulnerability and gentleness after life dumped the pile of shit on him. The tides of tenderness are always unexpected but most often they happen in the middle of the night when he jumps up drenched in a cold sweat from a nightmare. That’s when he snuggles closer to them like a child scared by dreadful thunderclaps and branched lightning. There are not so many things he needs to be happy: a gentle kiss on the top of the head would do just fine. Nikaidou also shows his soft side when the silly childish nature overcomes the bereaved byproduct of the war he has become. Then life seems a little more fun for him, and even more pleasant with their fingers squeezed in his hand. Otherwise, he is completely closed off both physically and emotionally and if confronted can’t even figure out what a person wants from him.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Each of their meetings awakens an irresistible desire in Nikaidou to embrace them in his arms and spin them around to the sound of their ringing laughter. However, as soon as he leans forward, slightly bends the knees so they can jump up for a hug, invisible threads pull him back. You can pinpoint an exact moment when it hits him that Nikaidou awkwardly straightens up and looks bewildered for where to put his hands.  In addition, he feels guilty either for the fact that he cannot give what they are asking for or for that he is so self-critical. If they still decide to take the initiative and hug him Nikaidou will not protest. So to say he never hugs them first but will return a hug half of the time.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

It doesn’t take him long to confess, I’d say, time ranges from three to six months. Since Nikaidou quickly becomes comfortable with patient people who return his love, he will not miss the moment to mention how he feels. Each of his declarations of love is unique. Sometimes Nikaidou grabs them by the hand and runs away into the sunset to recite a verse in a secluded corner. Sometimes he spins around with puppy delight and chatters nonsense, mixing it with I love you. I really do. Did I tell you that I love you? Wait, did I? It’s impossible to get a serious confession from him even when Nikaidou gives the impression of a collected person. Absolutely ecstatic when his s/o whispers sweet nonsense and words of love into his ear. You can see it by the changes on his hat.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Nikaidou is one of those people who can go batshit crazy in the blink of an eye because of one wrong word. Even silence in combination with an appraising gaze flares him up like a red rag does so on a bull and there is no going back from this point. He is laconic. No empty threats, no long prelude. Once Nikaidou draws out a knife it’s between his rival and God. This man doesn’t mind getting messy since every outrageous deed of his will be blamed either on painkillers or someone else. Tsurumi probably won’t want him to end up behind bars or on the scaffold.

Won’t ever accuse his s/o of being unfaithful and will turn blind eye to red flags because… Perhaps he is simply not ready to lose another loved one. Without realizing it, Nikaidou ignores veiled disparaging phrases and undisguised interest in someone else for the sake of peace of mind.

That doesn’t mean he won’t kick man’s ass to prevent subsequent misunderstandings.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Messy, greedy, and ingratiating. He was pretty popular among girls way back in time so you can call him an experienced one and it shows. When Nikaidou is struck by unexpected amorousness in public, he will occasionally plant a kiss on his s/o’s cheek or shoulder. No, social unacceptability does not matter at all in a face of his feelings. In private he is just uncontrollable: Nikaidou goes from kisses to bites back to nibbling exploring them from head to toes. Prefers to kiss his s/o behind the ears, on clavicles, grooves between the ribs, etc. Any place where there is almost nothing between the bone and the covering skin makes his neurons fire additional dopamine. At the same time, he can be wayward about being kissed so the safest options are kisses on the cheek or nose.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

I have reasonable doubts that any mother would want their kids to hand out around such a seasoned soldier as Nikaidou is but if it ever happened, they would have a fun time together. He turns into an absolute sweetheart when a little child grabs him by the hand and drag him along to show some sloppy hand-made craft. Even if Nikaidou tried to be harsh and unapproachable, his mask would fly off as soon as a high-pitched voice asked to play tag. Nevertheless, he prefers to stay away from kids to avoid scaring them with whatever frightening that could break through in his behavior. No need to give little one a recurring nightmare about limbs occasionally falling off to rumbling mirthless laughter. Never thought about having kids of his own but would definitely ponder if his s/o brought up this question. So, maybe, they and one or two cute little girls could make a perfect family?

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

They are erratic. To begin with, Nikaidou rarely spends nights with his loved one so catching him in the early hours is a tall tale. Much more often he visits them at lunchtime or even later in the afternoon having already fulfilled the plan to vex the top of the division. His mood has already dropped from a mania mark to ecstasy or normal level of excited agility making Nikaidou a skilled handyman, a voluble interlocutor, and an ardent lover three in one. While there is a free minute, he wants to mend creaking boards in the hallway right after describing the latest adventures in the smallest detail. May kiss them now and there between looking for the right tools and starring outside for a few sec. Overall Nikaidou endeavors to get the best of hours spent together.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Just like with mornings, staying over in his loved one’s place is a gemlike rarity. By the end of the day Nikaidou still in full swing and keeps the same attitude as earlier. When his battery finally dies, he turns into sluggish sessile mollusca Nikaidou homebodius that refuses to leave the secure shellhouse even if they beg him tearfully. Since outdoor activities are no longer an option, his s/o can try reading out loud, playing different board games, or chatting. Sleep quickly overpowers Nikaidou and he drags his loved one to bed or, if they don’t really want to sleep, tricks them into sitting next to him while he is peacefully dozing off.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Before the accident, he doesn’t feel the need to talk through every little event that happened to him during the conscious years of his life. If they ask specific questions, Nikaidou will still describe the past in general. The childhood did not differ from theirs, filled with small problems and big discoveries (as for a child). Teenage years? Well, nothing special, been there, done this… Neither he asks too much about his partner's past.

After all of the shit he endured, suspicion forces Nikaidou to always be alert and keep the banalest things to himself. You have to be a trusted person with a big T for him to open up at his own will.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

In a relatively safe environment and next to a loved one Nikaidou lowers his guard and allows himself to be amiable despite all irritants. He is too tired to worry, too tired to resort to passive aggression leave alone yell at them or show his anger in any other way so expect small sighs as a reaction to most stupid mistakes. Sometimes he just bursts out laughing instead of commenting on another misunderstanding. They may raise their voice in exasperation and Nikaidou would rather meekly look down than do the same in response. In a relationship, making him angry is not an easy task.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Nikaidou has a very selective memory which requires a strong emotional outburst to remember a thing. No matter how important it is in the eyes of his loved one or even in his own without proper reinforcement he won’t memorize it. For example, hypothetically and forgetting how he feels about the idea of family and marriage, on his wedding day he is overflowing with real solid happiness so naturally, this significant date will be engraved in his memory for life. Yet an important statement thrown in the boring conversation is unlikely to catch his attention. He pays little attention to anniversaries, remembers their birthday 5 times out of 10, and honestly is ok if they are just as thoughtful.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

The first moment of non-sexual intimacy like bathing together. It left Nikaidou speechless in unsuspected awkwardness of being perceived as he is, without the chance to hide or leave. For the first time in a while, he finds himself wondering what another person thinks of him, what sees in from of them, what feels toward him. Thanks to their love Nikaidou finds himself comfortable in his skin and a little more grounded. In a good way.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Congratulations on acquiring the iron man of the century with a wide range of body modifications to make this life safer for you and your loved ones. He won’t think twice to use Arisaka’s creations, both mechanisms hidden in the limbs and simply rifles created by his design, to disintegrate the slightest threat to his dearest. Not everybody around is seen as an enemy even though Nikaidou is terrified of losing them especially taking into account the unfolding carnage. Won’t ever ask them to protect him, won’t let them do it under any circumstances and if they show willfulness, he will surely scold them after a scrape.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Thinking ahead is the fate of weaklings. He has thought out one or two dates before realizing how tedious they appear so after that Nikaidou decided to invest only in the form of spur-of-the-moment ideas. Remembers about the anniversary if his loved one hints at it coming but diligently picks up a classic gift for them under the supervision of Tsukishima or Tsurumi himself. Likes to do chores? Hell yeah. When in a good mood Nikaidou can replace a whole group of handymen.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Not particularly that ugly? This is a problem that seeps into everyday life slowly and imperceptibly but sooner or later his small misdemeanors in everyday social interactions start to show. He misses one social cue, makes the situation kind of uncomfortable but doesn’t notice it until someone cautiously points it out. He tends to interrupt mid-sentence, often gets lost in thoughts and it puzzles him if a person finds it rude. Nikaidou navigates in society more or less successfully but can inadvertently bring a little awkwardness to the group.

Well, he is prone to all sorts of addiction. Not only painkillers. Any stupefying substance is at risk of transitioning from I’ll try it once just to know what’s like to I’ll go commit multiple atrocities if I don’t find a bottle or two.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

You probably don't expect to hear it, but outside the usual rush, Nikaidou prefers to keep himself neat and clean despite his style being on the weirder end of the style. He takes good care of his wooden limbs and repairs minor injuries himself. If the damage is done is beyond the limits of his capabilities, Nikaidou has no problem with asking Arisaka for a replacement. Definitely gets attached to clothes from his meager wardrobe easily.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

One of those people who won’t have energy left to go on without them. It’s misery. The devastation. The finish line right before the steep cliff that you don't have a spare second to stop from flying out into the abyss. Thirst for revenge helped him get back on his feet after losing his twin brother, who knows if it works twice. Overpowering sorrow sends Nikaidou into a frenzied episode of weeping and sobbing, he screams and wails like a wounded animal. If their killer is still around, he’ll try to cut them open in a fit of blind rage.

May fall in short psychosis and spend days sitting by their lifeless body, caressing heavy cold hands and peering in their lifeless eyes. Irreversibility of what is done hits him hard leading to gradual burnout.

And if they decide to leave him Nikaidou will hold a grudge. Everything is far from being as bad as in the previous scenario though, he just wants some space and everybody to shut the hell up as he stabs random objects. Secretly hopes for them to change their mind and come back. Somehow feels guilty about not being good enough.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

After 15 minutes of thinking, I came to the conclusion that I have none. Sorry!

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

It goes without saying changing Nikaidou is a waste of time like he is far from being a malleable clay and even further from mulling about adapt to someone's tastes. The thought is so bizarre that it fails to reach his subcortical structures and even if it did Nikaidou would rather flip a table and jump out of the window than agree to that idea.

The cold aloof type doesn’t get a pass either since without some effort on the part of the other person, they won’t pass the greeting milestone. Good luck in staring from afar as he evanesces with someone else's riffle running away from jaded Tsukishima.

People accustomed to planning every second of their lives with the scrupulousness of a busy businessman will have a hard time dealing with spontaneous shifts in Nikaidou’s mood and schedule. Half of the time he has a problem drawing a clock if you know what I mean.

Sugimoto’s relatives lmao, Nikaidou would definitely doesn’t like that in a partner.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

Turns into an unmovable stone by ten and passes out with clenching on their hand using it as a pledge of good sleep. If he did not manage to fall asleep, it means that Nikaidou could not spend all his energy during the day and will have to do this in the middle of the night. Don’t be surprised if you wake up to a newly planted garden or Nikaidou stuck in the roof. No, I don’t know how.

Dreams mostly about his brother. Surprisingly, nightmares rarely bother him and Youhei appears in bright scenes, basically, in an alternative universe where they never have joined the army and stayed forever in the fondest hometown. After such dreams, Nikaidou wakes up with an unpleasant feeling of a lump in his throat but at the same time, even such an illusory meeting with his brother gives him the strength to keep going.

So, Toni Anji. I won’t bend canon too much, so, let’s say, he still worked in the now-abandoned Matsuo sulfur mine up until its closure in 1979. This event forced him to look for new ways to make money and with a little hesitation, he decided to try out being a massage therapist, soon enough becoming famous for specializing in seitai and aromatherapy. The place where he works is far from popular, it’s a comparably small family business that cannot compete with the top spa in the area but it is nice nevertheless.  Due to the light workload, Toni always has a moment to flop on the bench and run his fingers through the lines of raised dots. Nothing bothers him there apart from one single warbler and rustle of foliage. His fingertips carry the smell of peach kernel oil throughout the day.

Being discreet, skilled at his job, and, most importantly, judicious made Toni popular among people who have things to hide. Yes, yes, you could already guess what I'm talking about the yakuza and their associates. Not once, nor twice, Toni was an unwitting listener to Usami’s boasting even though he knows nothing about the young man but his honeyed voice. Nikaidou is another of his regular customers. Conversations with him are much more restrained and mysterious leaving Toni wondering about mister x, y, z, how they are connected, and if he will ever hear about them again. Thankfully, he is almost one hundred percent sure nobody is going to put a bullet in his head for scanty crumbs of information low ranks have been feeding him.

There is so much more to his life outside the massage room too. Leaving the spa, he looks like a local hard worker living from shift to shift in a cardboard box on the outskirts, it’s just a vibe coming from his shabby jacket and unironed shirt underneath. However, Toni heads to the golf practice as a part of the Japanese Blind Golf Association (yes, he does it for the sake of irony, no, he attends games just to remind everybody he is still here) and later on a couple of oldies wait for him to grab a beer with spicy yakitori. Among others, there are both Hijikata and Nagakura who order sake instead of beer because who in the world needs knee joints that do not creek like an old attic board? Exactly. Toni always has a spare pack of allopurinol tucked away at home.

Speaking of which, his apartment is tiny. When I say tiny, I mean it. One room where if you get up from the bed you automatically enter the kitchen or bump your forehead on the bathroom door. From the outside, it seems that those few things that Toni owns are just scattered around the room but he actually remembers where each speck of dust lies. Corners where the dust is wiped off or its layer is thinner are meant for the book collection: he is keen on Japanese classics like Dazai Osamu, Yokomizo Seishi, Abe Kobo, etc.

Without any long preface, this would be brutal on him. Post-traumatic stress disorder developed after witnessing the many horrors of war and the loss of a brother combined with a substance addiction change the whole biochemistry of one’s brain: catecholamines, like epinephrine and norepinephrine, responsible for stress reactions, rise significantly and dopamine fluctuates greatly. Its low levels contribute to apathy and impaired attention and its high levels lead to restlessness, agitation, and psychosis.

Given the frenzied changes in his central nervous system (and in a whole organism, really) it is expected that Nikaidou will be even more nervous than usual. Literally the same day he gets a stalker, he finds himself even more uncomfortable.

Nikaidou turns around eagerly scanning the crowd with his eyes to find… something. Someone. Feeling a stranger’s gaze on his back makes his skin crawl but it also spurs on a soldier's instinct to quickly get rid of enemy surveillance.

The realization that someone is watching him, perhaps even now, at this second, deprives him of the remnants of sleep. But he feels just fine, starring in his own reflection in the window. If Nikaidou is lucky, his stalker will climb through the window and meet their fate sealed in a 6.5 caliber bullet.

If not, he’ll just steal another bottle of morphine in the infirmary and prepare to wait. It’s both uneasy excitement and gnawing fear that keeps him up at night.

But if they decide to leave Nikaidou a short message in the barracks, he will go bats: such impudence and fearlessness look like a damn mockery. To be so close to him, leaving a meaningless message under his nose just to escape… what a tease.

However, the more messages he receives, the more agitated he becomes, which leads to an inevitable breakdown. Mouth stretched out in a frog smile, huge eyes wandering without focusing on a thing, nervous laugh, self-mutilation… It can go many ways.

Considering that Nikaidou's entourage doesn’t consist of the most reliable people, it’s fair to say he wouldn’t know that someone is snooping around, asking about him. Usami would not miss the chance to see another circus show, Kikuta would turn a deaf ear since, Jesus Christ, no wonder someone asks about the main lunatic of the 7th division. It is clear that other soldiers care even less about it.

The theft of his belongings will also remain without a reaction. His attention span leaves much to be desired so unless the stalker tries to steal his stuff right in front of Nikaidou, he will ignore it. Stealing his ear necklace or, how to say it, his wooden parts results in an attempt to dismantle the house brick by brick in a frantic search. Also, gives him one more reason to add them to the hit list.