God Bless Them 20 Somethings | Ctrl | SZA
This monumental debut album by SZA has thoroughly secured my relationship with music. I now know how my mom felt in â98 when The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill graced the airwaves. There is no other album to date, by a young artist made in the 21st century that I have connected with as much as CTRL. There are moments on the album where SZAâs mother and grandmother are giving advice on the various topics the album presents. The first voice heard on CTRL is Mommy, as her daughter refers to her, saying the following kicking off the album :Â
â That is my greatest fear That if, if I lost control Or did not have control, things would just, you know I would be⌠fatal â
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 This track was produced and written in part by Pharrell Williams who also lends his voice for the whispers in the outro of the song. Solans reveals in the song that, as a result of her boyfriend not being with her on Valentineâs Day (and a host of other reasons), she has been sleeping with one of his friends behind his back. There is a line in âSupermodelâ where she says, âYou know I need too much attention for shit likeâ. I appreciated this lyric and other lyrics throughout the album for its raw emotion and plain language. As a young woman, daying in the digital can quite frankly trash. Everyoneâs worried about a fantasy world made up of algorithms online instead of the physical bleeding breathing person in front of them let alone the people they are in a relationship with.Â
 Another line I resonated with on this particular track is as follows: âWish I was comfortable just with myselfâ. I agree with her on this one. Why is it so hard for people to be alone? In the past I struggled to come to terms with being single, feeling like I was less than for not having someone to claim me as theirs. It is perfectly normal to just be getting to know yourself without the added pressure of palming someone else's happiness. You should know yourself wholeheartedly before entering a connection with another as to not lose yourself in the other person when things don't work out.Â
 Lastly, the lyric,â I get so lonely I forget what I'm worth, We get so lonely we pretend that its worstâŚ...lonely enough to let you treat me like thisâ, is basically saying that sheâll get so lonely that she temporarily forget how she is supposed to be treated by a significant other. Then, she says that the loneliness gets to the point where she convinces herself it feels like the toxic relationship would be better.Â
The electric guitar strums compliment the dark quality of the song. In the last 30 seconds of the song, SZA repeats the same line but it is met with drums in front of the guitar making the audience feel her words even more than the times previously saying the same thing.Â
 | Garden (Say it Like Dat) | Â
Solanaâs love language is her man telling her that her butt is getting bigger even it doesnât appear to be so. She expressed her insecurity of not being shapely like other women. Granny comes in the outro with a warning to her granddaughter telling her to âstand her groundâ. The inspiration for âGardens (Say it Like Dat)â was her desire to write a song for â[her] new self, writing to [her] old self to the someone [her] old self neededâ. Â
| Wavy(Interlude) featuring James Fauntleroy |
Interludes always seem to make it into my top picks on album reviews. I think its the aspect of leaving me yearning for more makes me appreciate the song that much more. The opening line is as follows: âI think Iâm bad as hell, I got issues out of lineâ. Solana is playing off the term âbad as hellâ, meaning a hot woman, to throw off the listener from the coming lyrics âI got issues out of lineâ.Â
The following is an excerpt from Genius.com, annotating the lyrics,
 âI was wavy I've been waitin' for you, boy And I was drownin'âÂ
: An allusion to the 1953 poem, âNot Waving but Drowningâ by Stevie Smith. The poem is about a man that from the shore appears to be waving at the people on the beach, but in reality, he is drowning. The first stanza goes: Nobody heard him, the dead man, But still he lay moaning: I was much further out than you thought And not waving but drowning SZA and James Fauntleroy may appear to be having a good time in their relationships, but in reality, they are crying out for help. (Genius.com)
This is my ultimate favorite song on Ctrl. When I first heard â20 Somethingâ I cried like a baby because I felt such a deep connection to the lyrics. I can remember driving up I10 in Houston, at night and blasting the album but when this song would come on I'd be so distraught that I needed to pull over. It was 2017 and the album had just dropped and I was dumbfounded at how well she could compute emotions I didn't know I had.âHow could it be 20 something, all alone still not a thing in my nameâ. Your twenties are a time where you have fun, they say. You're supposed to be exploring different types of people and be traveling, they say. But in reality, you end up being treated like a child but expected to take care of responsibilities. You're broke and so disassociated that we can't even do whats so say expected of us.
âBut God bless these 20 somethings
 (God bless, oh God bless, oh God bless, oh God bless, oh)Â
Hopin' my 20 somethings won't end Hopin' to keep the rest of my friendsÂ
Prayin' the 20 somethings don't kill me, kill meâ
Happy 2nd Birthday Ctrl !
 |tiffanytorree| be sure to follow me on all social platforms @tiffanytorreeÂ