#toosadtocare

During hard times I rely on music... So many great choices... keeps my mind busy... #pedalboard #nomorehashtags #toosadtocare #westpalm #westpalmbeach #westpalmbeachfl #mimosaville (at Mimosaville)

idk how long i was in there for... its been a while since i last took a very long shower and idk if ive shampooed and conditioned my hair twice or something. i always end up shampooing my hair twice without realising it. im not myself today. i realised if im going to cry, might as well do it in the shower so no one would see nor hear. i feel so fucking depressed. kept telling my tears not to come out and be strong.  i jus wanna fucking go home and hug my father and tell him everything will be okay. my heart is aching so bad. it feels so damn heavy. i cant even eat ffs. i havent felt this way since god knows when.. i wish i know how to ease the pain. i wish i can comfort my cousins and my aunt. i wish i can hug my father and take his pain away. i wish i can wipe away his tears. i wish i talked to my uncle before his last dying breathe. i wish many things but it wont get me anywhere.  i jus wish to be there for them. i wanna come home so bad. i do.