A better me is coming
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A better me is coming

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Today I’m turning a new leaf! Today I promise to myself that I will be the best me I could be. I will not except judgment, I will simply live my life. I won’t let any one hurt me. I’ll be stronger. I’ll love myself the way I deserve. I’ll live life to its fullest! I can’t take one day for granted! I’ll be thankful & appreciate. I won’t hide. I won’t hold back. I won’t stop or give up. There are no excuses, I need to work harder! I need to get my shit together! Be responsible! Get closer to god! & my family, I only get one I have to cherish them. But most importantly I’ll be me.
I kept myself away from people for about 24hours. Now that I'm back in public, it's like every person is a possible threat. I know that all of this is just in my mind, but what if someone does make an attempt on my life, or someone else's? What if I secretly want them to?
It's my bday 🎁
My best friend had her bf pause my movie at 12 pm, she came out of her room holding a present wrapped in Xmas paper with a candle on top, singing to me. I awkwardly open the gift and inside was a red robe, which automatically reminded me of Xmas. I then get overwhelmed wit excitement for the up coming festivities and all the things I wanted to do to celebrate. I look around the room at my best friends and my new cozy gift & feel the love. I remember that there is always something to look forward to, people who will always genuinely love you, and things to accomplish. I then feel better. The past few weeks start to seem like an unnecessary waste of time and pain. I need to remember what it's like to feel loved and to love. I need to let go of the pain which others have caused me, because at this point it's not relevant. They're not relevant. I can not, will not, let them take away this amazing experience away from me, which I have damn well worked for. I deserve to be happy and the people I love deserve to see my happy.