Because they're not truly shy. They're teasing and they're affectionate and they're gentle and they're sarcastic and they're awkward and they're loving...

But they're shy in their own ways.

Phupha has trouble putting softness into direct words. Yes, he's blunt and he's straightforward about almost everything else. But he's not used to being soft, he's not used to expressing his emotions. He's used to his friends who understand him without that, who know what he's doing without him having to say it.

Tian has more trouble being direct and straightforward. He has so many secrets that he's keeping, whether directly or because of the other secrets he feels he has to keep. He knows he wants to make a move but he wants more from Phupha before he opens up. He wants that confirmation, he wants to know he isn't imagining things.

They're both worried about rejection. They're both worried about misreading the situation. And that makes them shy about this one thing. And it's such an honest showing of their characters.

Phupha doesn't want to make Tian uncomfortable. He doesn't want to pressure him to stay out of obligation. His job is to take care of the teacher and he needs Tian to rely on him. If he expresses his love and Tian doesn't return those feelings... what happens next?

Tian worries about where the love is coming from, he worries that he's never felt like this before. He wonders if Phupha's attention is from his obligations or if it's from the love he wants to see. And he worries if he expresses his love and Phupha doesn't return those feelings... what happens next?

honestly, kit? i’m feeling terrible aksjakjssk like. i got soooo used to having a reason to wake up every monday lmao it’s been almost thirteen weeks like this. thirteen weeks!!! it feels like the trailer came out just yesterday! how is it ending tomorrow? time isn’t real!

and god i love our chaotic fandom. every monday is a whole circus here and we’re the little clowns going around make each other laugh to cope with the horrors of the plot 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

being here week by week with these people has been one of the best fandom experiences i’ve ever had and i’ll never forget it. not one moment of it.

plus saying goodbye to maxtul, maybe a permanent goodbye, isn’t easy. they’re my emotional support parents and having them around did make everything better. but we’re so incredibly lucky to have manner of death, so incredibly lucky they gave us this amazing gift.

i wish maxtul all the best, whatever they decide to do from now on, i wholeheartedly support them. even though i’m going to miss them every single day forever aksjaksj

it won’t be easy but i’ll keep this whole experience inside my heart so i can always go back and reminisce when i miss it.