#threepwillow

hunk: is a great zarya. is a GREAT zarya, holy shit. you don’t know how he figures out who the prime barrier target is, but he’s always at max charge and pins people to the goddamn wall with that laser pointer.  not super great at communicating his ult; “hey guys I’m just gonna--I’m just gonna, like, toss it in there okay?  rrrRRIGHT NOW OKAY GET IN THERE.  guys??”  “we’re all dead, dude”. also loves playing lucio to bits and pieces, shouts SPEED BOOST or HEALING BOOST when he changes tunes. hunk always gets 8 likes on his post-game card. he’s trying to improve his winston game.

lance: mains tracer and s76. you might think that because lance is the team sharpshooter, he’s effective with sniper class heroes. nope. the team doesn’t let him play widowmaker anymore because he just emotes so he can look at her butt. he’s a terrible hanzo and always fires the dragons 20 degrees in the wrong direction. ana doesn’t headshots so what’s the point. lance is the tracer the other team SCREAMS about because they can never find him to exact their revenge for that sticky grenade on their mercy. he will absolutely, 100% fucking eviscerate you as s76. lance is MADE of headshots. lays down a spray after every good play just in case he gets potg. spams “cheers mate” at any given opportunity.

keith:  plays genji. “what a cop out,” you may be thinking, “that keith plays genji.” listen.  keith is a fantastic genji, partially because he’s a very bad anything else. and he isn’t the annoying piece of shit genji that spams for healing every 3 hp he loses, because he knows where every single health pack is and capitalizes on pidge’s hack packs. absolutely merciless when it comes to hunting down and eliminating enemy healers. supernaturally lucky when it comes to loot boxes. that screenshot of the box that had all four legendary halloween skins? that was keith, and lance didn’t speak to him for three days after.

shiro: has a great eye for team comp, so he’ll switch into whatever role needs to be filled or to counter the other team. most comfortable with s76, reinhardt, pharah. incredibly, shiro is straight vicious as ana?? you did not know that ana potgs existed until you played with shiro. makes perfect calls and is always around to defend his healers or squishier dps, yet still manages to maintain gold medals for objective time. seriously, he’s always around to back up his teammates, except for that one time keith was dead with the flu so they let slav sub in on a few competitive matches.  towards the end, slav was somehow the only one who didn’t make it behind shiro’s shield all four times the enemy pharah ulted.

allura: a very very very very good symmetra, and places turrets in bits of environmental camouflage so enemies are long past melted by the time they figure out where the beams are coming from, and prefers the teleporter over the shield generator. plays a competent mercy, but does not particularly enjoy playing mercy unless she can go full-on pHARMacist. can fling d.va’s mech from three galaxies away and still get a team kill.