#thisisntabreakup

Maybe this is what I need to clear my head. I'm sorry, I don't know, am I being over dramatic?  Let me tell you...

Hi, I put myself out there for once. "What do you have to lose?"  I don't know, I didn't expect to lose anything.  But I didn't expect to gain anything either.

For the first time in a long time, you made me feel important. Wanted. Like I actually meant something to someone.  I came into this whole thing expecting to just have fun.  Sorry Marina and the Diamonds for breaking rule number two.  I didn't mean to get attached, I wasn't looking for anything out of this.

Maybe I was blinded by your looks, but I thought we had something.  In that short time together, I found out a lot about myself - thank you.  Everyday I started trusting you more and more.  One morning, I woke up, happy. With you.  I felt that this could potentially be something real.  I let down my guard.

You quietly walked away.  Because I cared too much, I asked what was wrong.  You responded "nothing" with a smile.  When you let me down in some way, you responded with a smile.  Like you wanted to try to save something but you couldn't.  

Now here I am.  Stone cold, tired of this.  All of this.  You left without a word.  I'm sorry I felt like I could trust you.  Thank you for adding to my reasons to keep that wall of mine thick.

Thank you for showing me now before I gave you more trust how shady you were.  Thank you for walking away when you did.