#thisgoestoyou

Its taken me over a week to reply to your message or in fact even have a proper look at it without being upset or disappointed or both or confused or shocked or I don't even know

This is one of the hardest things I've had to face recently, the reality of never sharing a moment at school, seeing you each morning, the awkward moment when we would make eye contact, all this never occuring again.

Honestly I wish things were different, I wish I had the guts to speak to you, now that I know how you feel I wish I had the chance to say something when I did.  But I thought you couldnt stand my presence or the fact I existed. 

I hate the way things have changed and I hate the way you hate yourself. I wish we could go back being how we were, I wish I could be that person I use to be and most of all I wish I could make you love yourself and see how amazing you truly are. 

You were not only a best friend, but you were my rock, you were my life. I've never had a friend like you, you were my thoughts when I couldn't think, you were someone I wish I was. You made me into someone I so gladly miss, a person I wish I could still be. I miss our friendship. I miss us three. Year 9 had its ups and downs but I would never ever in my whole life ever regret that year. Ever regret meeting you both, you both were my life and sadly still are as I care for you both so much, and if i ever knew you were terribly in pain or hurting I'd make sure if I couldnt do anything that someone else could. I love you both so much, you were my bestfriends and the memories will never fade.