HE'S TRYING, REALLY he is. that much becka is aware of, something she takes into account more & more each day. it must be difficult, to receive a girl like her within his care. the way all adults outside of gilead seemed to look at her was evident. that sense of pity, of something else she couldn't quite place. especially those at the refugee center. what had they told @thefallgvy right before bringing him to her? was he debriefed as she was? were they merely two individuals stumbling blindly through this whole thing? trying to understand each other & the worlds they came from. part of her is certain her dear uncle was not fit for parenthood. that this is a position he never saw himself within. how much of that was the truth?
“ this one is too big. ” the words come from the other side of the dressing room door, becka gazing upon her own reflection within the mirror. she felt ridiculous. things were so easy within gilead. her mother acquired all her new clothes, measurements taken by the aunts when she began to blossom. she never had to learn such tedious things or take into account what her shoe size must be. she never had to develop her own sense of fashion. perhaps that's why she now feels so out of place, picking at the dress that enveloped her form. since when had she cared this much about her appearance?
( "prideful girls lead to sinful women, rebecka. would god want you to be prideful?" no, aunt vidala, he would not. ) “ i look like i'm wearing a blanket. ” door handle turns, the teen stepping out into fluorescent changing room lights. the fabric was like a tent across petite frame, daring to swallow her whole. in this moment, she misses her purple adornments most of all. the freedom to choose was dizzying, in the worst way possible. “ could we find another dress? ”
