thebluetempest asked you: Â mourn me... ;v;
 When the funeral had happened Jake had convinced himself this was alright, that John would be back in a flash obviously, that this was all some dumb prank he had concocted. John would soon be laughing and Jake would laugh as well, punching his shoulder and it would have all been a prank. A prank!
Even during the funeral he'd stared at the open casket, and couldn't find his tears.
John was alive. He was alive. He was...he was here. Still-
It had all come crashing down on him one fine spring afternoon, he'd just been walking down to the nearby park. It had become a habit to go swinging, it felt almost as if he could touch the sky with his fingertips. He'd made it halfway there, the park was in sight down the road when a huge gust of wind had nearly knocked him off his feet. He had been visiting Jane in Washington and turning behind him a chuckle was already bubbling to his lips.
"Thought you could get the best of me, eh John??" But John wasn't there.
 Really, truly in that moment Jake found his tears, and felt so stupid for sobbing in the middle of the sidewalk. His hands frantically rubbed at his face, which was pure red at this point as it all just flooded back, open casket and all. Jake stood and cried for god knows how long.
"John, john....john come back, please," the words were mumbled into his hands, and he managed to walk himself to the park bench where he sat down, placing his arms in his lap and hid his face. Anyone who walked by he tried to quiet down, but if you got close enough you could still hear his quiet, pained voice just repeating John's name over and over again. The grieving hit hard and Jake didn't know how long he stayed out there, the wind tugging at his clothes every now and again.
 Eventually Jane had come out to find him, and slowly the two walked back to her and Roxy's home. Silent sobs the only movement he made the whole way back.
