The kind of fucked up part about me is that I compare my trauma with everyone else's and I call i "little" in that comparison. Like I haven't suffered enough. Hell, most of the time, I don't like calling it trauma. Because I feel that it's "relaxing" compared to all the experiences I see shared by many.
Fuck even while writing this post, I still feel extremely guilty for calling it trauma. I don't know what to say other than, I hate how it's basically been turned into a ranking process for me instead of a healing process.
The patterns and anxiety that my trauma left me with are there. They're proof that I can't deny the trauma any longer.
I now have to quickly post this post meanwhile I still am brave enough and while I'm not afraid to callout my trauma for being my trauma.
