#the accessory

imagine you desperately want to build your ruined reputation as an employee back up and the guy who hires you to Good-Angel his ailing brotherwife back to health A) doesn’t respect the precarity of your work status, and B) is incapable of grasping the degree of Shattered Husk he is demanding you fix overnight so he can terminate your contract ASAP

sure dean Halfway apologizes to sam (not really - it isn’t an actual apology; he makes it about himself) for the deceit and manipulation that enabled sam’s noncon possession to continue for as long as it did. for creating the circumstances that ended with kevin dead at sam’s hands, though dean is unable to own this failure beyond vague notions of I Should Have Protected The Kid (what does dean’s concept of “protection” entail in the first place?)

so the reason dean reacts so negatively to sam’s anger post “road trip” isn’t because he doesn’t understand why sam is angry. if he didn’t understand he wouldn’t be stewing in guilt and leaning on his usual coping methods of drinking and killing without asking questions and drinking some more. he doesn’t understand the sheer depths of the hurt/betrayal that he inflicted on sam, sure, because he is clearly incapable of processing that. but the reason sam’s anger angers him despite his self-centered non-apology apology in the immediate aftermath is because he feels entitled to sam’s forgiveness. because the decision weighed on him and because he’s guilty about the consequences and because he was “stupid for the right reasons” (cas’s irresponsible words lmfao). he’s merely doing his job of Protecting Sam and sam doesn’t see it that way (“you’re certainly willing to do the sacrificing as long as you’re not the one getting hurt”) which is an insult to dean’s pride. “I saved your hide back there […] I’d do it again,” says dean. “you can’t stand the thought of being alone,” says sam.