#thatnunu

The reality hit after walking into the lab to get my STAT blood test. I was in the 3rd hour of my urgent care visit for lower right abdominal pain. Unlike during the day when I have my routine visits, the lab was a ghost town. The white numbers flashing on the blue TV screens letting patients know it’s their turn to either check in or get drawn, were at a standstill. I pulled my ticket and the overhead voice screamed at me to check in. The lab clerk took my hospital card and told me it was $10, I think I rolled my eyes and thought, “Another co-pay?!” I sat down with the boy and my sister, for some reason I still had to wait almost 10 minutes to get my blood drawn. I was the ONLY one there!!

I was instructed to go to radiology, the urgent care doctor wanted to confirm (or deny) that all my symptoms, i.e. the lower right abdominal pain, tenderness, diarrhea, nausea and vomiting, were in fact appendicitis. We followed the arrows through the empty hallway into the very empty radiology room. If you don’t know or have never had a CT Scan, you have to clean out your bowls. Usually, your doctor sets up an appointment, you take home some kind of laxative, take it the morning of and just refrain from eating until your appointment. Since this was STAT, I had the choice of drinking Go Lytely or an enema. After looking at the face of my tired companions, who had spent the majority of the night with me, I opted for the enema, since it would be faster. I’m a nurse, I’ve given an enema before, no big deal. I undressed, gowned up and was ready for this x-ray to be over. I walked into the room and noticed the overhead painting of a tree with beautiful purple and pink flowers with the blue calming sky in the background. I also noticed two IV bags, I knew I was going to have contrast injected, but what was the other bag for? It had a clear liquid which looked like water, but it was connected to tubing that was bigger than IV tubing, my eyes followed the tubing to the end and I felt my eyes get just a little bit bigger when I saw what it was attached to. For all my nursing friends, it looked like a penis shaped younker, in English: I would compare it to a slightly thicker boba straw. I (wo)manned up, got the IV inserted and the enema. I felt discomfort, nauseous and light headed. The rad tech kept telling me to hold it in or else we would have to do the enema all over again. I laid in the machine with a stomach full of water, nauseous, and a warm and tingly feeling from the contrast being injected at me. The calming blue sky above did help a bit.

After releasing my bowels and getting dressed, the rad tech told me he had to leave the IV because depending on the outcome of the x-ray, I may have to be admitted into the emergency room and have surgery done for the “appendicitis”. By this time it was almost 1030pm and I found where ALL the people were. I wasn’t alone! When I went to check-in, I wondered, “Why do they have bulletproof glass covering the desk? Is the ER that dangerous? I only see sick old people and kids. Maybe it’s for the 5150’s (crazy patients).” I waited another 15 minutes until the nurse called me in. He checked my vitals and asked, “What brings you into the emergency room today?” The question annoyed me, because I came from urgent care more than 3 hours ago, the doctor had me get my blood drawn, a CT Scan and come to the ER to have the doctor here read my x-ray results … do you NOT have that information in the computer? After explaining, he brought me to one of the ER exam rooms. It was cold, uninviting and plain. I wondered if anyone coded on one of these ER beds.

I waited another 10 minutes and the doctor, who was young, Asian and was wearing cowboy boots, came in and told me had reviewed my labs and CT Scan of my abdomen. After almost 4½ hours I was NEGATIVE for appendicitis. I was relieved to hear that I wasn’t going to be admitted and have emergency surgery, no one knows the primary function of the appendix, but I’ve grown to like it. I was still having major abdominal pain, so he diagnosed me with colitis (which I still think I don’t have) and told me that I probably ate something bad. And since I already had IV access, he ordered ibuprofen IV push. The ER nurse came in and administered the medication, but it barely relieved any pain. She was really sweet and kind. She told me that she’s worked as an ER nurse for 10 years and she loves it.

Back to my point, the reality hit me after paying $200 in co-pays and meeting the ER nurse that I have to 1.) Get healthy and 2.) Go back to school. I realized that it’s EXPEN$IVE and inconvenient to be unhealthy. I really couldn’t believe how much I paid to find out that I had colitis and most likely just had a bad case of food poisoning. That was money I could have spent on gas, groceries or clothes! And most importantly, I need to get healthy. I need to take care of myself, because no one else can motivate me more than myself. Seeing my patients in the conditions there are in is sad, because they get depressed and sometimes just want to give up. I don’t want to be like that. I want to be my patients’ friends, who are rockin’ their gold chains, stockings with sandals, and driving up to the facility in their Cadillac’s knowing that they can walk up out of this place whenever they want. PLUS, I need to go back to school. Nursing is a very rewarding job and after all I went through that night, I was very appreciative of the staff that helped me. People who work in the medical field don’t always get recognized or thanked for the work they do, but believe me, I was very thankful. I already feel good helping my patients and I felt more grateful knowing there are other people out there that care just as much for others.

So, this is the start of my new journey. This time I want to stick to it. I’m not looking to get followers, but it would be a great help if anyone would support and encourage this journey I plan to take. And even if no one reads this, THIS IS ALL FOR ME. NO ONE ELSE CAN DO THIS BUT ME.