So I tweeted at Patrick Warburton about an hour ago “I wonder how Tharl is doing? 🐘" but I accidentally typed ‘who’ instead ‘how’ so it read “I wonder who Tharl is doing?” and I just noticed it and deleted it but wouldn’t it be wild if he tweeted back with some crazy ship for Tharl?
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I admit, I’m actually really fascinated by the mechanics of Tharl’s external esophagus. Does he bend over when he eats simply to get around the tube, or is that how the food gets up into that esophagus while other food goes down? And since it’s located where we’d expect a nose to be, does their species have theirs elsewhere or even have a sense of smell at all? I’d like to know more about the biology behind this evolution.
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This story takes place far in the future, the year is 2626 or as most people call it double 26, before we can dive into this tale, we need to explain some things, so sit back, relax and stay open-minded. In this universe humans have explored most of the galaxy and has found many different species or aliens whichever you like to call them, there are many, each with its own quirks and language but for simplicity we will mention three excluding humans.
The Placades, ruled by a single queen of which history has forgotten their name. The Placades lived on a planet called Sol, the planet was a waste land with no water and no real life except for the abominations that roamed its surface, this is why the Placades cities, were high in the sky, far away from the planets surface but close enough not to fall out of orbit. They had a docking station acting as a second moon, because it was very hard to land on the planets surface with a spacecraft, the cities technology interfered with the ships causing them to crash. The Placades were a very friendly species to say the least, they all followed the same religion called the Peacebearers by strangers, it followed a very simple principle to never raise a hand against another, even in self-defence, the rest of the teachings were about controlling ones emotions and in all of written history, there has never been a Placade that has killed or harmed any living creature.
That is all you need to know about the Placades so we'll move on to the Tharl, they had certain sectors that was in charge with one leading that sector and with a long line of succession. The Tharl live on a swamp planet called Horax, this planet is riddled with monsters and beasts, forcing the Tharl to live underwater most of their lives, only the bravest venturing up to the surface, with very few returning. They had some of the highest technology next to the Placades, the difference being that they, unlike the Placades, were fine building and making weapons, and so became the top weapon suppliers around. Even with their intelligence, they weren't very good fighters and could only fight in groups, none could survive alone, getting them to hire help over the years. They aren't very trusting in others, it took a lot of time for that trust to come, they are also very twitchy, jumping at most noises. This brings us to the Zorg.
The Zorg are very aggressive, they are a hive species, meaning one female, a queen, that they all work for and worship. There are two classes of Zorg, the workers of which no one has ever seen, that work primarily for the queen as builders, hunters ect... and then the attackers, these are the guys everyone sees, hears and fears, except the Placade. The attackers are the most violent, their soul purpose to protect the queen, to fight. Because of their violent nature, they will not stay in the hive for long, they tend to venture out joining or making clans, to pit against each other, their planet an asteroid of what it once was, caused by the war and blood thirst of the attackers. The queen does not concern herself with the politics of the aliens nor does she truly care, because of this it is the attackers that take care of it, they were also hired to help the Tharl with their troubles leading to a good deal between them, the Zorg gets weapons, the Tharl gets protection, a win-win for both side right? Sadly it didn't last long.
There is one more thing you should know before we get this story going, so please be a bit more patient, I will try to be as brief as possible. There was a war, a couple of years before this story, it was called the galaxy war, and it was between the Zorg and the Tharl. This terrible war started by a demand of the Zorg, they demanded the Tharl to design a weapon that could potentially blow up a planet if activated, the Tharl, thinking the Zorg had gone insane, polity declined, the Zorg was not happy, they pulled back the protection on Horax and in turn the Tharl stopped the supply of weapons for the Zorg. Each species knew something was going down and so ran to their respective sides, some out of fear of the Zorg, others wanting to put an end to them before they were all enslaved, tension was high between the Zorg and the Tharl, growing as each day went by. Until finally, someone fired, no one knows exactly who was the first to fire, it depends on which side you ask but it was clear that it was fired, and so the galaxy was plunged into war, a bloody war, the only ones enjoying themselves being the Zorg.
One day the war got close to Sol, that was when the queen declared the planet neutral, to no ones surprise, and used repulsers to keep the warships far away from the home world, surprisingly the Zorg seemed enraged by this action, no one really understood why and no one suspected that the Zorg would go that far...... many years were spent in the war, standing at an impasse. That was until the humans arrived, finding this battlefield and who was the first species they encountered, the Zorg of course. It was only after the war that the humans knew what they had done and the Zorg's real plan from the start. the Zorg tricked the humans into blowing up the Placades home world with their primitive weapons. Because you see the humans weapons were so primitive at that point and unlike the technology of the aliens, that it could past through the repulsers with ease and the planet nearest Sol without being in length of the repulser, held the largest of the Tharl army. they were crushed by the debris of Sol.
The Zorg got their “revenge” and they won the war a few weeks later. The Tharl and their allies fell and became what they feared would happen, they are now enslaved to the Zorg and can no longer mutter a word in defiance, unless they want to be severely punished, they work many hours making technology and weapons for just enough money to live off of and work in different factories, including some that are found on Earth, Zorg industries. Now you have all you need to know and if you are wondering the Placades have been classed as extinct by human hands even if everyone knows it was really the Zorg. Now we may begin our story.