text 💬 turdo
Turtle: Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I’m not pregnant.
Turtle: I think they just haven't figured out how to unlock male pregnancy symbols yet, though.
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text 💬 turdo
Turtle: Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I’m not pregnant.
Turtle: I think they just haven't figured out how to unlock male pregnancy symbols yet, though.

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text 💬# waldani
Leilani: Sorry, I know I'm probably like... the last person in the world that you want to talk to right now. And maybe I shouldn't be talking to you because I'm probably just making things worse for myself, and this is all so confusing and hard and things always seem less hard when I talk to you and I just... wanted to see how you're doing, I guess. Is Scarlett as mad at you as she is at me? This is all my fault, I'm so sorry you're stuck going through all of this because of me :(
text 💬! emdo
Emmett: Who the fuck wears as many snapbacks as you do without at least being a fraternity first? Like, what ARE you, dude?
TEXT ✉️💀 BERDO
Bernie: I DID A SPLIT WHILE I WAS HIGH BUT NOW I'M NOT HIGH ANYMORE AND I'M STUCK, WHAT DO I DO?
TEXT ✉️✘ SELDO
Selena: I tried engaging in the illegal substance that you're so fond of and it made me MORE ANXIOUS instead of less! Isn't that the opposite of how it's supposed to work? Why does your green friend HATE ME?

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TEXT 😩 WALTANI
Waldo: ur all good, girl! honestly thats a little weird since its usually smoking too much smoke or too hard that messes with ear canals but its defo not permanent! whered u get ur edible from? sounds like u could use some better stuff.
Vitani: idk some stoner prince from camelot or prydain or something!!! WHAT IF I GOT TOO MUCH WATER IN MY EAR FROM SWIMMING ALL SUMMER AND FUCKED UP MY EAR CANAL OR SOMETHING?
📱 + Waldo
17. A comforting text
✉️ → waldo: God, don’t like, cry about it or anything. There are a million other hats just like it on Amazon. Seriously, there are 17 more of that exact same hat in stock right now.
@whereswaldohatter
SEND “ 📱 + A NAME” FOR A RANDOM TEXT FROM MY MUSE.
📱 + Waldo
2. A sad text
✉️ → waldo: Dude, falling down a rabbit hole really doesn’t seem like the best way to get places. Do you think anything’s ever died on the way down? Like, have you ever just caught a dead puppy or something that fell in the hole by mistake?
@whereswaldohatter
SEND “ 📱 + A NAME” FOR A RANDOM TEXT FROM MY MUSE.