#tdcdevelopment

Faline had been at the Circus for months now. She was used to it here, and she was comfortable. Every now and again she'd get a phone call from her mother or sister, but never her father. She knew she'd disappointed him when she ran away.

She curled up on her couch with some tea and opened her Diary, ready to write about her most recent date with Ali, when she caught a glimpse of something she'd written months ago - when she'd first arrived

Dear Diary, 

the Circus is amazing. It's so beautiful here. Everyone is nice too, well most of them. But there isn't a single detail that doesn't seemed plucked out of a Fairy Tale. I met Scar today- a ringleader. he helped me when I had a 'black out' and hurt my head. He's really sweet, but kind of scary-

Faline laughed at her own diary, little did she know that she'd be repaying the favor to Scar when he had his own accident and lost his memory. she turned the page and read a bit more

I met this amazing man today. his name is Ali, he's a Fire Dancer in the Performance Sector, where i work - he's really hot, and i will feel no shame if i spend a little more time than i should setting up in his tent for his show-

Faline blushed at her own words and quickly turned the page. She hadn't needed to spend 'extra time' in his tent, he was coming over to apartment and eating dinner with her and kissing her in the lake. this brought a smile to her lips

This evening was the night of the dance and oh boy was it something, i found Ali - even with his mask and we went down to the lake and swam, he kissed me too. There's something special about him. He's the first guy I've been around who i feel hasn't any intention of using me - 

And she was right. But Ali wasn't the only person she'd met, she'd gotten close to a lot of people here. She still couldn't believe how everyone here had supported her when her sister was in hospital. Faline stirred her tea and flipped through a few more pages, it was reading someone else's life, but someone's who she knew. She re-read all the drama that had taken place in the Circus, Everyone getting engaged, ending it, getting pregnant, getting hurt, beaten, lost, Ariel going bazurk and Faline helping her clean up Scar's apartment after bandaging her up. She was still worried about Ariel, she hadn't spoken to her in a while but she knew her state was fragile. 

Then there were her dear friends Sally and Emily, the sewing girls, she'd met them both very early on, and they'd been through so much together. but she still love them and them her. Sally had also found love, Artie, a guy Faline approved of 100% for her, they were perfect together.

Then there was Baron, a person who she'd kill for, someone she feels super protective over and is more than happy to take a chunk out of her scheduled to make sure he's happy. She'd helped him through a lot, but he had also helped her, and now there was a sibling-like relationship between them, but more functional than him and his other siblings

Faline was lost in thought, deep in the memories of what had happened at the Circus. 

She'd helped more people than she could remember, met more, laughed and cried more than she had in years and spent every hour improving herself and the performance of her job. She was truly living for the first time in years

re-reading all of her early entries also showed how much she had changed. She could hardly recognize herself. Now she was independent, making a living on her own, away from her family and helping other people. She was further away from them than she had ever been in her life, but this was the first time she hadn't felt completely alone.

People needed her here, she had a job that got her up every morning and worked her to the bone, but she loved it. She spent hours organizing the prop and costume storage tent for the performers. The tent was in a shocking state when she'd first arrived and that was what she started her job with - making some sense of it. 

She pulled herself back from her thoughts and picked up her pen, she began to write

Dear Diary, 

so much has changed here -  people have come and gone, i've changed for the better, and my life will never be the way it was before the Circus, but i don't ever want to go back. I love it here, i love the people, i love the mess, the noise, the constant workload i have. it's like there's a spell over this place and we're all fairy-tails and fantasy, and for once in my life i feel whole, like i belong, and like i'm not a screw up. 

Tonight i'm going to tell Ali i love him. i'm hoping for the best, but if there's one thing this place has taught me is that if you never take the chance, you'll never fail, but you'll never win.

What do you consider the most important event of your life so far?

”The most important event would be the time when he sent his first three victims into the hospital. The feelings he got from it, the relief he got from it, the joy he got from it and the want to do it over and over again. This story became one of the biggest expects of his life. The story people knew him for.”

Who has had the most influence on you?

"Zachariah wouldn't admit itt but the most influence he had from all the people around him. Whatever they thought and said; whenever they bullied him for his memories. They made him what he is today. They made him ignoring everything, they made him angry, the made him dangerous. The only good thing they did, for Zachariah is the fact that he stopped caring about others and their opinions."

What do you consider your greatest achievement?

"It is hard to say for him. Everytime he finds someone to let his anger out he thinks it is a wonderful achievement, but thinking of it Zachariah exactly knows what in fact is his greatest: Coming to the Circus. A place were people actually accepted him for being what he was; not that he was caring until now. He stopped it."

What is your greatest regret?

”The only thing Zachariah could actually regret is that he didn't stop caring earlier. His life now; without anyone to care about, without caring about people's opinion, without thinking of his probably dying family; was so much more easy and joyful.”

What is the most evil thing you have ever done?

”For Zachariah there is no such thing as evil and good. Whatever her does, if he breaks someone's boned, ruins someone's life or even take their life's he doesn't see it as evil. In his mind they surely did all deserve that for something. He wouldn't call himself a hero for doing what he does, but he doesn't see himself as the worst guy either.”

Do you have a criminal record of any kind?

”Since Zachariah finds his joy in torturing the people and not killing them, he actually has quite a lot criminal records. The first case ever of course the story of The Big Bad Wolf and the Three little pigs. He also has some other for assault. Just his dead victims are never found.”

When was the time you were the most frightened?

”There never was a time when Zachariah actually was frightened. He started to ignore things at a young age and at some point his life seemed to worthless to actually care what happens to it. And until now he getss to the point of saying that he surely would deserve that as well to die. So not even dead can scare him anymore.”

What is the most embarrassing thing ever to happen to you?

”Thinking back there was just one moment he was embarrassed. When in school he opened the door to his locker and all the broken glass and pills fell out; everyone started to laugh as if it was the funniest thing to prank the kid who has a broken, drug addicted family and bullied in school.”

If you could change one thing from your past, what would it be, and why?

”Sometimes it gety to the point that Zachariah wonders how his life would've been if I had a normal family with clothers everyone was wearing, so that he wouldn't get bullied. At this point he sometimes deep in his heart wants to change exactly that, but just a second later he remembers how satisfied he is with his life now and that there is no reason to change something.”

What is your best memory?

”Leaving his hometown, because he knew that no one would accept him there. It actually sound like a bad memory to get basically bullied and kicked out of the own hometown but for Zachariah it was one of the best choices he ever made and he doesn't see it as leaving his home, he sees it as finding a home.”

What is your worst memory?

What do you consider the most important event of your life so far?

"The most important event is probably; even though that the fact that her father left her hits her everyday straight in the face; the time when her brothers showed her how to fight for yourself and how to be noticed. It is what made her to what she is now."

Who has had the most influence on you?

"The biggest influence was always Vivian's family. Mother, father and her two beloved brothers. They taught her a lot; things she still remembers and always will."

What do you consider your greatest achievement?

"For Vivian her greatest achievement is becoming how she is right now. She loves it. She loves to live the life she has and she loves herself for making all the right decisions, so that she got to the place where she is right now."

What is your greatest regret?

"It is the fact that she wasn't leaving home earlier. That she didn't leave as soon as Kevin and Charlie left. And she still doesn't know why she stayed in the first place. She loved her brothers more than anything and her mother always wanting to be around her after their leaving annoyed her to death. Vivian always comes to the end that she should've left earlier."

What is the most evil thing you have ever done?

"Vivian doesn't do seriously evil things. Surely some people would call her behavior as evil and arrogant, since she's always says whatever she thinks and wants straight away, thinking that she'll get everything she desires immediately. So it isn't seriously evil."

Do you have a criminal record of any kind?

"There is no criminal record and the only thing Vivian could probably get a record for was starting to drink and to smoke with a too young age, but since this time is over even that won't be seen anymore. She looks forward to not get any criminal records."

When was the time you were the most frightened?

"It was when Vivian had been out; searching for some attention she wasn't given at home. As usual it wasn't the hardest thing for her to do; immediately her body in the tight dress and her beauty caught some of the men's attention. Too much attention. In the moment she was leaving she didn't notice some men were following her and when she did it was too late and she was scared to death; until someone was helping her."

What is the most embarrassing thing ever to happen to you?

"Vivian keeps care that nothing embarrassing happens to her. Each move she makes, each word she says is deliberated. She likes attention but not the one she would get from doung something embarrassing."

If you could change one thing from your past, what would it be, and why?

"It is always a fun thought to say that if she could actually change something Vivian would drag her brothers back to their home; just as her father. She would stay with the happy family she got. But then she pauses, knowing that their family was never as happy as it seemed. They all had left for a reason and to make everything up there must be more than one thing to change."

What is your best memory?

"Sometimes Vivian gets to the point that she thinks that there actually are no good memories anymore; and especially no best one. A best memory of her would include her brothers and her father, but since they all left her at one point she can just look back in sadness at this memory; knowing that whatever happened there won't ever happen again."

What is your worst memory?

What is your first memory?

"Vivian can't really remember anymore what happened in her first memory. It was too early to keep remembering it until now, but what she can remember are the smiling faces of her family and she was in the middle of it."

What was your favorite toy?

"A doll. Her father gave it to her when she was a little girl and didn't want to stop crying after her brothers left to get to school."

What was your favorite game?

"It isn't actually a game she played when she was younger and found some joy in. She used to make fun over her brothers, loving them as much as possible, but making fun about every little mistake they did. That's what they get for making everything into a battle."

Any non-family member adults stick out in your mind? Who were they, and how did you know them? Why do they stick out?

"It was actually no one really specific or someone Vivian knew for years. She had seen the woman only for a month, when a aerol performance group was in the city. Each week for two days they showed their performance in a hall not far away from the Xavier's home. Being amazed by the elegance of the men and women while they were flying through the air she found something she wanted to do as well. During the month she talked to one woman whenever she got a free minute, learning about this art. Until at some point Vivian started to practice, becoming better and better until beig perfect in it."

Who was your best friend when you were growing up?

"Her best friend for years was a two years older boy she met in the kindergarten. It was a weird kid, who might have seemed stupid once in a while, but that was what Vivian liked about him. She could laugh with him and, since he seriously admired the girl, she could send him around; let him do everything she wanted. Whatever it was he had heard and jumped immediately. It was a weird friendship, where everyone thought she was just using the poor boy, but even though it might have seemed like this, she liked him just as much as he liked her."

What is your fondest childhood memory?

"Since her father left the family there's this dark shadow that goes through every of her actually fond memories, because he has usually been a part of it. And after he left something missed and she had always the feeling of being abandoned; being alone. Until the one point, where she noticed the looks the men gave her again. The looks which showed that she was admired, that she was wanted and love. The looks which showed that there was no way that she would end up alone."

What is your worst childhood memory?

What is your character’s name? Does the character have a nickname?

"Felicity Faline, but everyone calls me Faline"

yeah, and some people call her 'Sweetie' 'Doe' and a few other things

  2.     What is your character’s hair color? Eye color?

“Uh, brown-blonde hair and blue eyes”

That about sums it up

3.     What kind of distinguishing facial features does your character have?

“Gosh, I don’t know?”

Super-pretty-uber-blue-glowing-in-the-freaking-sunlight-eyes!

4.     Does your character have a birthmark? Where is it? What about scars? How did they get them?

“Well, I have a small birthmark on my lower back, it looks a bit like a doe-mark. And a few small scars where I’ve cut my legs from running in the woods”

She’s not really too careful about herself

5.     Who are your character’s friends and family? Who do they surround themselves with? Who are the people your character is closest to? Who do they wish they were closest to?

“My family, well, it’s my mom, dad and sister. I spend a lot of time with different people because of my job, moving about. Who do I wish I was closest to?! Well I’m not saying that!”

She loves her family but doesn’t spend that much time with them, even though she’s closer to her sister. She also spends a lot of her time with people who are contrary to her character. And she wants to be uber close to Ali at the moment

6.     Where was your character born? Where have they lived since then? Where do they call home?

“I was born in the same neighbourhood I grew up in, in San Diego, but then I needed to live, so I moved to San Francisco to live with my sister, but now ‘home’ for me is here”

Home for her is also with her sister, but she doesn’t like thinking too much about her, she misses her and feels bad about how she needed to leave her.

7.     Where does your character go when they’re angry?

“Angry? Why would I get angry?”

She does get angry, she goes to the Prop Room to hide

8.     What is their biggest fear? Who have they told this to? Who would they never tell this to? Why?

“Now, if it’s my biggest secret why would I tell anyone?”

She doesn’t want to die alone, or unloved. She’s never told anyone this, even though it’s obvious

9.     Does they have a secret?

“Again with the ‘not telling’, really why are you so curious?”

She’s not going to tell you, heck I don’t even know!

10.  What makes your character laugh out loud?

“Well, I guess people being funny?”

She laughs easily but really laughs when they’re flirting with her or giving her a run for her money

11.  When has your character been in love? Had a broken heart?

“In love? No, I wish I have been though, but that might change soon”

What is in your character’s refrigerator right now? On the bedroom floor? On the nightstand? In the garbage can?

"The refrigerator of Vivian usually is quite empty. It sometimes seems as if she isn't even living in the apartment. Her bedroom floor is almost fully occupied with clothes. She can leave a complete chaos in her room and surprisingly still have clothes in her wardrobe. On her nightstand there isn't much besides a lamp and a jewel case. The garbage can is empty."

Look at your character’s feet. Describe what you see there. Do they wear dress shoes, gym shoes, or none at all? Are they in socks that are ratty and full of holes? Or are they wearing a pair of blue and gold slippers knitted by their grandmother?

"Vivian wears a pair of black high heels with a blood red sole, she only owns high heels and only wears them unless she has to perform. Her toe nails are painted red or black."

When your character thinks of their childhood kitchen, what smell do they associate with it? Sauerkraut? Oatmeal cookies? Paint? Why is that smell so resonant for them?

"Loving to be alone Vivian missed the family dinners most of the time and came in the kitchen, deep in the night, to make herself some food. Because of that she associates a good smell with it. With the time she learned how to cook."

Your character is doing intense spring cleaning. What is easy for them to throw out? What is difficult? Why?

"It's quite easy to her to throw personal stuff away. She doesn't know why, but it just isn't as personal and as important to her as for others. At least not as long as it isn't something which belonged her family. Also she can't throw away her clothers. She keeps them all always."

It’s Saturday at noon. What is your character doing? Give details. If they’re eating breakfast, what exactly are they eating? If they’re stretching out in the backyard to sun, what kind of blanket or towel do are they on?

"Vivian always does something different. She can't do every day the same thing. So one day she maybe will be just standing in front of her wardrobes, looking through her clothes, while she on the other day will be sitting outside enjoying the sun on her skin or making some sport to stay fit."

What is one strong memory that has stuck with your character from childhood? Why is it so powerful and lasting?

"A strong memory definitely is the moment when Vivian lost her father. She surely had reasons to hate him, but she also had reasons to love him. And she did. She had always been the father's child and everything he did affected her in a way. Bad things killed her inside and there were bad things, and in the end he left her; ripping something out of her heart."

Your character is getting ready for a night out. Where are they going? What do they wear? Who would they go with?