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The first time I’ve loaded up BG3 in over 9 months and I just,,,
I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU
SYLDYR!!!!! MY FAVORITE OC EVER!!!!! RRRRAAAAAAGHGHHHHGHGGGHGHHGGG
Also I have such a fucking hard-on for his armor I forgot how beautiful it is - I remember it took me forever to find a dye that would actually change it to green, and coupled with the silver???? God it’s just 🤌🤌🤌🤌 MWAH
Working on Syldyr’s backstory is honestly the funniest thing to me because I’ll sit down to jot some ideas down and then when I get back up I’ve created the history and origin of a powerful folk legend, written the entire life story of a princess that becomes the founder of a village, and begun new idea threads that did not exist until just now that will begin to unfold into their own lengthy stories in time
And nowhere in there have I even mentioned Syldyr - the character that spurred ALL OF THIS into creation - even once
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Astarion - the originally-intended romance partner b/c I heard he had a lot of durge-specific dialogue and I wanted to see that, but then said dialogue had them relating so much that I was like ‘well fuck this DOES work really well’, so I committed and he was Syldyr’s “canonical” end-game romance for the playthrough
Karlach - wanted to romance her from the get but my previous playthrough my friend romanced her so I was curious this time around, ended up thinking a LOT about how sweet Syldyr’s connection with her was and couldn’t shake it after that (she’s the only one that actually kinda listens to durge when you tell her about the murder impulses, and Syldyr was craving someone to believe him and ground him in reality. she saw who he was, what he was, and still believed he could be good, and that cut straight down to Syldyr’s soul (aka right in the backstory))
Gale - appeared in the Act 2 durge scene instead of Astarion as an accident of the relation progression system (game ended up counting Karlach and Gale as my two active romances even though I had already spent the night with Astarion in Act 1, I think just because their approvals were just slightly ahead of Astarion’s, and then when I had to turn down Karlach b/c no poly in base game, Gale was next in the romance & approval line-up), but decided to play through it anyway as feelings Syldyr hadn’t acknowledged yet, and then the following scenes with Gale ended up working so well and sucker-punching me in the heart so hard that I could no longer pretend that Syldyr wasn’t also deeply in love with Gale
this guy has gone through so many character arcs he is 3 different characters in 1, possibly even 4
1) he's a baby bhaalspawn set loose in the streets of Baldur's Gate. he's found by a visiting village leader that says 'i can fix him' with their whole chest. he's taken back to a little forest village hidden deep in the woods to learn the ways of druids and rangers
2) he's a sweet, kind-hearted, well-adjusted teenager who's learned to control his urges. he's been taught by his adopted family to channel said urges into hunting to provide food & materials for the village, and also killing to protect the village from the occasional wayward monster - because it did, in fact, take a village with this one. honestly the village should get major props for doing so, because teaching the importance of life to a demigod of murder and death is one hell of a tall order
3) he's a cruel, merciless, enigmatic leader of a cult after being kidnapped from his village by Sceleritas and brainwashed through years of torture in the temple of Bhaal. he kills and murders and he revels in it, he rallies assassins to his cause, he hatches the idea of an army born to die, and dances a death spiral with his new worstie, Gortash. they love-hate fuck, plot, and scheme until Orin guts his brains to usurp his throne
4) he's a shell of a being, uncertain, impulsive, and aimless after waking up on the nautiloid. he has all this muscle memory of navigating forests and stringing a bow - but also of swinging a blade and carving knives through flesh. he has no idea what to make of any of it. he craves connection with others. he craves power. the war between those desires makes him unstable even without his dark urges running wild. his friends and budding lovers steer him true amidst earth-shattering revelations about his past and his role in their predicament, and he develops a personality in the midst of it all. he's gentle and generous and wry with his humor amongst friends, he's threatening and short-tempered and ruthless in his efficiency against their enemies. he cares most about the people he's connected with over the course of their adventures, and finds a balance in what power he needs to acquire in order to help them without becoming just another enemy himself. he settles into himself, the shell of the past falling away around a confident and grounded hero. a hero not for the Gate, but for the people he loves, determined to defeat the elder brain and see all his friends and lovers safe and happy
Honestly I think the thing that’s getting me about not being able to draw my current favorite oc is that the style I imagine him in isn’t the style I currently draw in - it has a much higher focus on realistic human anatomy rather than the more simplified & kinda cartoony style I’ve been drawing with, and I’m just not practiced enough with that to do it off the cuff 🤔
I guess I gotta go through an art journey to develop a new style just for him then ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
