#sueng

    “I’m t’red of h’ding us.” Berwald tilts his head down so he’s looking into the beautiful green eyes of the one he holds closest to his heart. Arthur smiles sadly, and pulls away from him. His warmth and scent linger long enough to make Berwald ache with want. He watches him shuffle over to the bed, and sit at the foot of it.

    “Berry, you know we can’t-”

    “I don’t care wh’t they s’y! Or th’nk! Jag älskar dig! And I w’nt everyone t’ know! I w’nt-”

    “Berwald.” He falls silent. “I know. Believe me, I know. But we can’t. You know we can’t. We aren’t allowed to love each other. It’s dangerous. Homosexuality may have been decriminlized, but it’s still classified as… as…!” He shakes his head.

    “A d’sease. A m’ntal illn’ss.” Berwald’s words come out bitterly.

    “Hey.” Arthur stands, and makes his way over to him again. He takes both of his hands and squeezes. “It’s not. But we have a limited say on that. You know that. I believe in our people though.” Berwald gives him a pained look.

    “And wh’t if th’y don’t ch’nge anyth’ng?” Arthur sighs heavily.

    “We can’t think of that, Berry.” He presses their foreheads together lovingly. “We have to think of positive things. We have to. Otherwise we-” Berwald kisses him gently. He doesn’t want to hear any more. After a moment, he pulls away with a sorrowful smile.

    “Let’s n’t w’rry about th’t. We’re at a h’tel f’r a reason.” Arthur chuckles quietly.

    “You’re right. After all, if it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t have even come here tonight. I love you. And I know our people will do the right thing.” Berwald grunts in reply, and leads him over to the bed. That’s enough talking until after they’re done with their main activity.

~ Late October, 1979

    “Berwald?” Arthur stares at him in confusion. “What are you doing here?” He opens the door a bit wider. “Please, come in.” He steps aside, watching his lover come inside. “To what do I owe the pleasure?” Berwald’s bottom lip trembles, and he pulls Arthur in for a tight, loving hug.

    “Th’y decl’ssified homos’xual’ty as a d’sease in m’ c’ntry.” He feels tears pricking at his eyes. “Th-th’y d’d it…” Arthur kisses his jaw.

    “That’s wonderful news!” He lifts up Berwald and spins him around happily, eyes shining.

    “I f’rg’t you c’ld do th’t.” Arthur grins at him as he sets him down. “A-anyw’y,” he looks away, cheeks flushed. “I w’s w’ndering… W’ld you l’ke t’ m’ve in? We m’y st’ll get h’te, but… It’s n’t a disease th’re anym’re.”

    “Of course. I would love that. Thank you.” He tangles his fingers in Berwald’s hair. “I’ll have to visit here often, but I want to officially be living with you. And we can be open about our relationship, at least there. I know how much you want that.”

    “J-ja. Please.” Arthur laughs, and leans into him.

    “I love you.” He kisses him, but not without leaving enough time for him to pull away if he doesn’t want it.

    He shakes it off as best he can, and focuses on listening to the people around him, in an attempt to figure out where he is. They’re all speaking English, with an accent he can’t quite pinpoint. Each person’s accent is slightly different, and some are difficult to interpret. Then, a flood of people descends from a ship that docks faster than any he’s ever seen. Someone yells out, “Pirates!” and the people around him start to scatter. That’s enough for him to figure out he’s in England. And Arthur isn’t going to be happy with him, if he learns of him being there. But he’s too close to the crew to run. They’re already upon him, trying to force him back to their ship. He fights as best he can to get free, and manages to knock a few off of himself, but with each one he pushes away, two more join. Eventually, they manage to drag him onto the ship, much to his displeasure.

    “We’ve got a fighter, captain.” One of them drawls out. “We thought you might want to deal with him.” Berwald is thrown to the ground harshly. He doesn’t manage to catch himself, and his glasses slip off his face. He reaches for them quickly, but a gloved hand has hold of them before he can even touch them.

    “Of course I’ll deal with him.” The voice starts in front of him, and by the time he’s done with the sentence, he’s behind him. The man ties his hands behind his back, making sure to be rough on him. He is yanked up, and shoved into a room. The chatter of the crew falls away, and he can tell they’re alone now, even though he can’t see well. “What are you doing in my country, Berwald?” His tone is condescending, but there’s a strange softness behind it. He doesn’t question it. He learned long ago not to.

    “M’ deep’st ap’logies, Arth’r.” He bows his head. “T’no and I br’ke up. I h’d a m’ntal lapse and j’st ran. I c’me to h’re.” He hears a soft tongue click.

    “I’m sorry to hear about your breakup.” Maybe Arthur can use this to his advantage? “But you are on my ship now. I won’t make you work as hard as the others, but you still need to work. I can’t have my crew thinking I’ve gone soft. Especially for someone so attractive.”

    “You th’nk I’m attr’ctive?” Arthur scoffs lightly.

    “That’s not what you were supposed to take out of that.” He unties Berwald, and hands him his glasses. “You will be my assistant. Anything I want, you have to do. We are docking somewhere in a week, but after that I will navigate us to Sweden so we can drop you off. I’m sure your family will miss you terribly by then.” The taller man grimaces.

    “B’cause I w’nt M’thias t’ sm’ther me.” Arthur chuckles.

    “It’ll be good for you! It will remind you that they love you, no matter what. That can be hard to remember.” His heart pangs with the thought of his own family. He shakes his head slightly, and sharpens his voice to a demanding tone. “I want you to make me some tea. Now!” Berwald hurries off to do as he’s told. Arthur decides having him to tease is going to be fun.

~

    It started out small; a wink here and there, a compliment when Berwald seemed extra stuck in his head, jokingly offering to sleep in the same bed. But now Arthur finds himself thinking about kissing and cuddling and overall loving the Swede. He can tell he’s still completely crushed from the breakup with Tino, so he’s not about to reveal the feelings he may or may not have, but it hurts to think about holding it in forever. He’s never seen Berwald so clearly upset, and it makes him yearn to do something special for him. Something that can get his mind off the pain, if only for a moment. But time is running out. They’re due to dock in Sweden in the morning, and Arthur is locked in his room, thinking about how Berwald’s eyes shame the sky and the sea combined. And how soft his hair looks, even though they’ve been sailing without proper hygienic care for three months. And how warm he must be to cuddle, judging by the heat he radiates onto Arthur when they’re close to each other. He really needs to speak with Francis about how to express himself better.

    “Captain?” There’s a knock at his door, and he’s startled out of his thoughts. “We should be docking in an hour. We got ahead of schedule. Why do you want to drop him off here, anyway?” Sorrow floods into the pit of his stomach. An hour. In an hour, Berwald will leave, and he has no idea when they’ll see each other again. He opens the door, sending a glare to the man that interrupted his thoughts.

    “He is someone very important to the country of Sweden. We have to return him, or we risk being hunted. We cannot afford that. I am just thankful he was able to send a letter when we first docked, after forcing him aboard. Be glad he is forgiving, or we would all be drowned by now.” He narrows his eyes at him. “Understood?” A frantic nod. “Tell him to come here with my dinner as soon as he can. And inform the cook he will be eating with me, so there should be enough for two.”

    “Yes Captain!” He disappears into the throng of his fellow crew members. Maybe fifteen minutes later, Berwald makes his way to him, face more expressionless than ever.

    “H’ngry t’night?” Arthur shakes his head, and smiles at him. He opens the door so he can place the tray on the table inside.

    “I thought we should eat together before you go. I hope it will take your mind off of what awaits, at least until you leave.” Berwald’s eyes fill with gratitude. So he is anxious about leaving. “Come, sit. We do not have much longer together.” He pulls out a chair for Berwald, hoping he’s not being too obvious about his feelings for him. Maybe he’ll just see it as being considerate.

    “Tack,” he practically whispers, refusing to look at Arthur.

    “Is something wrong?”

    “Nej. I’m j’st… N’t ready t’ go b’ck y’t.” He sighs heavily. “I’ve n’t h’d to th’nk ab’t it s’nce I’ve been h’re.” Arthur furrows his brows slightly. He knows exactly what he’s talking about.

    “I’m sure Tino has moved out by now. And, if not, here.” He slides a coin purse across the table to him. “This should buy you a month’s worth of board. Maybe a bit more, depending on where you go. No, don’t try to give it back. It’s yours now. It’s really not much. Think of it as a thank you for entertaining me for the time you’ve been here. Life was boring and repetitive before you came. I’m not looking forward to it returning to that. But you have to go home. You won’t heal until you face the problem head on.” Berwald gives him a tiny, incredibly rare, smile. It lights his face up in a blush, and he looks away quickly.

    “Tack. Really. I w’n’t f’rget th’s. Or our t’me t’gether.” He bows his head and continues eating. Arthur notices the small bit of red on his cheeks, but doesn’t say anything. He’s too cute to risk it. He could hide it, after all. That would be a tragedy.

    “Captain! We have docked!” Arthur groans internally. He doesn’t want Berwald to go. And, judging by how rigid he looks, he doesn’t want to go either. He reaches out and squeezes his arm.

    “Face your fears head on. You’re a pirate now. And you used to be a Viking. You can do it. I believe in you.” He pauses for a response. When none comes, he stands slowly. “I’ll walk you out.” The chair scratches against the wooden floor as he pushes it back. At least he’s willing to come now. He opens the door, and shudders a bit when a cold gust of wind hits him. Berwald doesn’t seem affected by it. He walks out, and looks back at Arthur pleadingly. “I’m coming,” he mumbles, closing the door behind them. They walk to the side of the boat in silence. Just before Berwald places his foot on the boarding and unboarding area, Arthur clears his throat. “Here.” He shrugs off his coat and wraps it around the Swede’s shoulders. “It’s cold out here. You’ll need something to keep warm. I’ve got a cabin. You have to walk. J-just don’t get it dirty! I expect it to be returned to me the next time we see each other.”

    Berwald smiles at him, and wraps his arms around him in a tight hug. He melts into the embrace, and takes in his scent. Somehow, he smells like coffee and cinnamon. He brings his arms up to hug him back, clinging on tightly. He has to mentally tell himself now is not the time to confess. They separate too soon, but he hides his discontent with a sad smile. “Tack. F’r ev’ryth’ng. I w’sh you w’ll tr’veling.” Berwald presses a warm kiss to his forehead, and hurries off the ship.

    “Who was that?” His friend doesn’t even look up from the book in his lap as he replies.

    “That’s Sweden. Berwald. We’re practically brothers.” He waves his hand dismissively. “He’s painfully shy, which would explain why he didn’t stay very long when he saw you. He probably wants to ask me a question that can wait. If it were important, he would have asked me to leave the room. But since he didn’t we don’t have to worry about it. Let’s continue with the spell.” Lukas reaches across him and picks up a sage incense. “Disgusting. But it’s better than using actual sage, and it works nearly as well. I’m upset we couldn’t find any Thyme, that would have been the best option.” He rolls his eyes heavily. Arthur can’t help but think that looks like a health hazard.

    “I wish we could do a normal cleansing and be done with it.”

    “Don’t we both! But the necklace has a lot of strong energy attached to it. I wouldn’t feel safe without a protective circle.” He nods slowly, not really focusing on what he’s saying. He’s distracted by an image in his mind’s eye.

    “Berwald has pretty eyes,” he watches Lukas’ head snap up, and realizes too late he said that out loud. “My deepest apologies! I wasn’t meant to actually say that. Only think it.” His friend stares at him for a long moment, expression carefully neutral. He shifts uncomfortably, thinking he made him upset. Then, he grins.

    “You think he’s cute, don’t you?” Arthur feels himself flush, and he turns his head away.

    “What!? Don’t be ridiculous! Of course he’s not cute!” He shakes his head vigorously, trying to convince himself just as much as he’s trying to convince Lukas.

    “You’re blushing! You do think he’s cute!” He gets a vicious glare sent at him, and laughs. “Fine, fine. We don’t have to talk about it right now. But I am introducing you two. He could use a friend. He recently went through a breakup that’s been rough on him.” He feels bad for thinking it, but he can’t help but focus on the fact that Berwald is single.

~

    Arthur has come to the conclusion that Berwald is absolutely adorable. It’s been seven months since they first met, and he’s only fallen harder for the man. But he’s not dared to say anything about it; he’s still hurting from his breakup. Which is probably what led him to what he’s doing at the moment. He takes a deep breath, and tosses a single strand of Berwald’s hair into the spell jar. He seals it, and places it in the hole he’s already dug. It’s all biodegradable material, including the container, so he doesn’t have to worry about digging it up later. It’s a healing spell jar, but only using good wishes and nothing forced. Forcing Berwald into getting better before he’s ready isn’t something he wants to do, but he sees no harm in something that’s going to help him, if he's willing to let it. He hopes it works.

~

    Five months later, Berwald stumbles into Arthur’s living room at three in the morning. He had been writing a letter to confess his feelings when it happened. The universe must royally hate him. “Berwald,” he says cautiously, afraid he might startle him. He closes the door behind him quietly, staring at him the whole time. He’s obviously drunk.

    “C’ll me B’rry.” Arthur furrows his brows in confusion. The Swede suddenly advances on him, wrapping his arms around his waist and burying his face into his chest with a near-silent sob. He brings his arms up, and carefully hugs him.

    “Alright, love. To what do I owe the pleasure of your visit? At three in the morning.” He watches Berwald look up at him, eyes filled with… He’s not too sure what the emotion is, actually. His stomach fills with dread. He’s been able to tell what he’s feeling through his eyes for nearly a year. The fact it’s so unintelligible now concerns him to no end. “Berry?” He practically whispers.

    “Jag älskar dig, min vackra häxa.” Arthur blinks a few times, confused. He’s unsure what was just said, but there’s so much sincerity behind it. It makes his heart ache. Then, he feels lips on his. It takes him a moment to register the touch, and by the time he does he’s backed against the wall. The kiss is desperate and needy, almost feral. As much as he wants it to continue, he forces himself to pull away and place his hands on Berwald's shoulders, keeping him from going back.

    “Even though I would love to make out, I have to know what you said.” He flinches heavily when he realizes what he’s said.

    “Nej, don’t d’ th’t.” He brings his hands up and cups Arthur’s cheeks with them. “I w’nt t’ m’ke out too.” The corner of his mouth twitches up, into an awkward smile. “I l’ve you, m’ beaut’f’l w’tch. C’n I k’ss you n’w?” The Brit stares at him in shock. After a moment, he nods. He can’t find it in himself to speak just yet. He’s too surprised.

    Berwald shrugs the hands on his shoulders off, and steps close once again. He presses their lips together, but it's gentle this time. Almost fearful. Arthur wraps his arms around his neck to reassure him, and it works. He deepens the kiss, and it quickly gets heated. He pulls away with a gasp when he feels a hand in his hair. “B-Berwald,” he murmurs breathlessly. “I’ve loved you for-”

    “Eight and a h’lf m’nths, b’t been int’rested ‘n me s’nce you f’rst s’w me.” His eyes widen.

    “Lukas told you! I asked him not to.” Berwald chuckles, and kisses his nose.

    “You are c’te wh’n you g’t ups’t. He t’ld me b’cause I w’nt t’ h’m hyp’rvent’lating. I… real’zed I h’ve feel’ngs f’r you. I w’s afr’d you d’dn’t th’nk of me l’ke th’t. S’ he h’d t’ reass’re me. I c’me str’ght h’re.”

    “Ah. So you were drinking because you thought I didn’t love you back.” A nod. “Well, you couldn’t have been more wrong. I love you so very much. I’m so happy you love me back.” He pecks his lips, smiling brightly. “Now let’s get you to sleep. We can discuss this further in the morning.”

    “Mm m’ybe you’re r’ght. I l’ve you, m’ l’vely m’gic w’rker.” He kisses him once more, then walks toward the bedroom, knowing Arthur won’t be opposed to sleeping together.