“When you’re someone who has become used to romanticising your suffering, being kind to yourself feels unfamiliar and unhelpful. You use your self-hatred as motivation to do better, be better, look better. Without your constant stream of “I’m not good enough” you have nothing to work towards and no ideal self that will make all the bad things in life go away.
Self-compassion feels like giving up. It’s like saying to yourself you’re going to stop trying and let yourself fail, like admitting that nothing you do matters anyway. It’s easier to just believe that you can hate yourself into making progress. Being hard on yourself feels morally correct because you think it’s in a bid to improve your life, like it’s a marker of self-discipline.”
— the liminal space, “your hair is falling out because you hate yourself”
