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- @lesssicotic "

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Meh this is such a weird little thing, I think you should be safe just saying “no thanks, you’re too young” and blocking them. 

Oh compulsory heterosexuality, you annoying thing! But anyway I come to the conclusion that I am in fact a lesbian. I also come to the conclusion that I have to come out all over again. I got nervous because what if my family dislikes the fact I’ll never be with a guy.

I need not have worried because my dad didn’t even react. None of my friends were in the least bit surprised either (to quote my best friend “all you ever talk about is girls” and another said I just gave off that vibe, to which I say hell yeah!).

When I told my mom, she just looked at me and said, “Didn’t you already tell me this? This is not news.” So bottom line I am was the last to know and am really lucky.

lol been there, went through pretty much the same path of self discovery. 

Congrats on figuring yourself out, I’m happy for you that everyone was fine with it. I hope you’ll be happy and stay free of comp het from now on... <3

This is THE GREATEST coming out story you will EVER hear y'all it’s a classic and I will never live it down but I love it

So I do theatre tournaments for my school and we go out of town for them, and theatre kids are like 10% gay so you’ve got a good enough chance that, like, everyone hits on everyone at these things and we’re all in suits and it’s just awesome cuz you’ll never see these people outside of tournaments so it’s not like coming out will come back to haunt you cuz they can’t contact your parents! It’s great

Anyways, it was round 2 of the Auditioning event (basically you perform a monologue you’ve never seen before for a panel of judges and they rate you and say “yes I would cast you” “no I would not”) and I am GOOD at that event, so I placed 1st in my round 1 room.

I’m sitting on the floor with a boy and a girl who look to be about my age and we start talking about the event and our lives.

Eventually I make a casual comment about my homophobic mother and the girl kinda sits up and asks me a little bit about my home life and I’m like yeah it’s shitty but it’s fine, and she kinda smiles all reassuringly at me and gives me some advice and I’m like “dang she’s actually…really hot”

And she WAS oh god she was

A little later she asked “do you have a girlfriend then?” And at the time I didn’t, so I say “nah I’m not too good at that” and she says “at what?” “Being…being gay, actually” “Oh I’m sure you’re plenty fine at being gay.”

And time goes by (about fifteen minutes) and idk if she notices I’m hitting on her but I think the boy starts to notice so he switches the topic back to the competition and asks me “what place did you get in your room last round?”

I say “first! You?” He says he got third place, and I turn to the girl, kinda wink at her, and ask what place she got.

She laughs and said “oh no sweetie, I’m not competing! I’m his mother.”

Yes: she was his MOTHER.

So I kinda freeze and I laugh awkwardly and say “oh”

She says “aw you thought I was a high schooler? You’re so sweet! Did you not see my wedding ring?”

And I kinda laughed and said “yeah uh no I gotta go” and luckily they called my name to go read and she hugged me and wished me luck.

That’s the end, right? WRONG!

There was another girl from my school, my now girlfriend, who witnessed this event and told the entire group from my school. I didn’t care. It was a great story. Until…

Outside of another one of my events, group improv scenes, I see HER WITHOUT HER SON outside the door. She comes up to me and started talking and wishing me luck and I’m over here dying because my friends are all waving and giggling about my “sugar momma” (oh did I mention—SHE HAS A RADIO TALK SHOW AND IS A MILLIONAIRE FOR FUCKS SAKE) and says “yeah I came to watch you perform! You’re so sweet!”

And I was like “haha yeah…”

We ended up doing great in that event, and I never saw her again (thank god) but to this day I still hear about the time I hit on a married 45-year-old millionaire with seven kids, one of whom was sitting right in between us.

I think maybe things would be easier if I had other friends so she wouldn’t be my everything, but the handful of lgbt events I’ve been to in the last couple of years were full of straight 'allies’ and 'q….rs’ and I haven’t really had any luck online either. Should I go back to therapy? Or should I talk to her (or is it too late?) Or should I just try to make friends? (but how?) I don’t think dating someone would be fair to them until I’m over my best friend…

Talk to her. I don’t think there is such a thing as too late.

Just make it clear you understand the situation, that you’re not trying to get her to drop her marriage or any such crazy thing, that you just need some closure. Tell her how you feel, and that you have no expectations about that, you just need to get it off your chest so you can get a clean slate. If she’s your best friend, she knows you. She’ll understand where you’re coming from, and as long as you keep it all respectful and clear, I don’t think it has to be the end of anything. 

However, if you decide that you don’t want to risk it, then yes, I do believe making new friends and finding new people is the way to go. You’re 27, get on dating apps/websites, facebook groups, whatever you can find. I know that the qu**r activists are everywhere right now, but I’m sure you’ll find a like-minded lesbian somewhere out there.

I know dating apps like Tinder get a bad rep for being “sex crazed”, but I do believe it doesn’t have to be that way, just make it clear you’re searching for friends most of all, and see where that gets you.

I think getting over someone always works best if you have someone new, and I don’t mean you have to immediately start dating other women, but allow yourself to look at them differently, allow yourself to realize you’re a single woman, and that it’s okay to find other women attractive and beautiful and even harbor little friend-crushes or real crushes you don’t really plan on acting on. 

You don’t need to be dating someone to find them interesting and beautiful, and that’s all you need to allow  yourself to do. 

I think everyone can use a psychologist, no matter what’s the struggle, but since this is clearly getting in the way of you feeling happy and ready to get out there, maybe a psychologist could be all you need. Keep in mind that their advice can always be taken with a grain of salt, make sure they know that your decision has been made (to either tell her or not), and ask them to help you work from there. 

I wish you the very best of luck, and I’m sorry you’ve been stagnant in this limbo for so long. I hope you’ll be able to move on, and that you won’t lose this close friend as you do. 

Take care!

I guess I’m just here to vent, I dunno..

I’m not even sure where to start tbh.. I’m sad and angry and just heartbroken. I was with a girl for a while and I thought we loved each other, but maybe I was just deluding myself. Everything fell apart and she decided to stay with her boyfriend, like I expected her to. And maybe that’s the real problem? Not the fact that I expected her to per se, but the fact that I knew this was going to happen and that I’m not even surprised. He told her to stop talking to me (and so did I) and maybe it’s for the best. I don’t know what’s going to happen now with the two of them and I don’t want to know. I feel so hurt, I don’t even know what to do with myself. I guess she never really loved me. And maybe I didn’t really love her, I don’t know. This whole thing just feels.. anti-climactic. Whatever happens with her, I’ve made up my mind. I’m going to leave the state with a couple of my friends and find greener pastures somewhere else. I’ve had enough. It feels like the right time to leave. I’m not sure when I’m going to be done crying over this, but I’m just ready for it to stop.. She used to be on tumblr and I’m sure she’ll recognize this as me if she ever sees it and I hope she does. I want her to know that I’m not sorry things aren’t different. I want her to know that it couldn’t have turned out better. I want her to know that she never said the right thing when it actually mattered.

Thank you for giving me a space to vent xx

Hey, nonny, I’m just leaving this here, I hope this was in some way cathartic to you <3 Things will get better soon, you’ll get a fresh start elsewhere, the sky will clear, you’ll be okay. 

We’re here for you!