#stupendibull

The Man slowly awoke. He hadn't yet processed much. He didn't even realize yet he'd begun to stir from unconsciousness. He blinked his eyes open before squinting them back tight to shield his retinas from the blinding light that stared back at him. As he slowly let himself get accustomed the light that made its way through his eyelids, he noticed gravity pulling down on him from the front, against a cool, metal table behind him.

The man carefully opened his eyes, this time to less pain, though not to much more visibility - there was something overhead, maybe, but as he attempted to stir from his resting position, he felt a harsh tug on his wrists and remained locked in place.

His head rolled around to see that hands - and, as it appeared when he tried to move his lower body, his feet, too - were secured tightly with cuffs to the table behind him.

...oh no

Oh no.

He glanced frantically around the room as best he could, though it appeared near pitch black when in contrast to the light overhead, when a movement out of the corner of his eye alerted him. His captor stood. The sound of footsteps drew closer as they approached. Finally, as they walked into the glare of the light, it illuminated their dark hair and their brightly colored, well-ironed suit, and a ray of light hit his eye, glinting off the small metal pendant that hung from their neck.

Bull glared at them.

"You."

"Me."

"What do you want? I'm not telling you anything!" he inquired, then responded after figuring out the answer himself.

"Oh, don't be so insistent, Mr. Bull. I have many ways of getting gentlemen to part with their words."

The spy forced himself to keep his mouth shut, or a single wrong sound could lead to the loss of his life. Or his career.

The mastermind touched their fingertips to one another, circling the table like a shark. "Now," they said, "I have a question or two for you and your little agency. And I expect you will answer honestly, assuming you want that saw," they pointed overhead to the something, that appeared quite sharp and round now that Bull saw it clearly, "to remain above your head."

The Man narrowed his eyes, attempting to gulp down his fear and ignore the way it clumped up in his throat and blocked the air form escaping his lungs. If he lied, he would die, or worse. If he told the truth, he'd likely still die, or become enslaved under a dictatorial regime, along with the rest of the world. Neither future looked particularly bright, and the only way to weasel out of them would be to win in a mind game against a world champion - prize: the fate of the Earth.

No biggie.

As the villain approached...

"Now..."

...he felt his heart squeeze...

"Question one..."

...and miss a beat.

"Would you still fight me if I were a worm?"

"what"

"It's a simple question, James."

"Weh- I, uh, well... What??"

They sighed and threw their head back. "Now, look, not one of my evil schemes has ever gone awry - nor will one; I've back-ups and safe fails galore - but, just say, if my wormification ray were to backfire on me... Could I... Well, could I still rely on you to be my archnemesis?"

They looked at him expectantly. Bull's mind was blank. He blinked. He blinked again. He blinked a third time. Perhaps a fourth blink would suddenly jumpstart his brain. This had to be a trick. A trap. Some sort of code or something, and if he answered a bomb would go off in the capital of, uh... of some country somewhere - whatever he said, they'd like... like... well I don't know, something would blow up or die or explode. Wait. Two of those were the same thing. Whatever! He needed more information, a way to pinch out a little bit of knowledge from the guarded safe that was this dastard's mind. He opened his mouth to release a masterfully crafted question.

"What?"

They stared deadpan at him and raised the remote control for the device above their heads. "Answer the question or you're getting sawed."

"Nonononono no, no, no, I, uh... well, are you... do you still have, like, human level intelligence?"

They scoffed, "Well of course I-" then they stopped and stood there for a second, blank-faced. "One moment," they said, before turning around and going off into the corner to think. The spy looked around for a moment, thinking maybe this could be an opportunity for escape if he had actually come up with a plan for escape, but before anything appeared to him, the fiend had returned.

"Yes. Well, not quite human level intelligence, but, more. All the brainpower I currently possess, I will still have. As a worm."

"Well, then... well then yeah, I guess I'd still fight you. I mean it might... might be a little weird but I don't see why not, I-I guess. You'd still - I think - still be public enemy number one, just. uh. a worm now."

They grinned and raised a different controller, pressing a large and dangerous-looking red button on it.

"Perfect. The plan will commence."