Aug 15, 2021
The intimacy of "I'm not hungry, but I'll sit with you."
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The intimacy of "I'm not hungry, but I'll sit with you."
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Thinking about the time the girl in my class who I had a crush on came up to me after my big final presentation and told me that she was hanging on every word, that she never wanted it to end, and that she almost stood up and cheered at the end of my part. And so, dear reader, did said girl sweep me off my feet? Kiss me and whisk me away after that? SPOILER ALERT: she did not. She got (hetero) engaged instead. ๐คท๐พโโ๏ธ.
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I just played an online game with some guy who let me win 12 games in a row! There was no chat function in the game, so we could only communicate through a series of basic emojis and preloaded generic game phrases. One that he kept saying was "I will let you win," which, at first, I thought was ironic teasing, or at worst, his patronizing way of saying that I wasn't very good.
I tried to play, but he potted the 8 ball and asked for a rematch. "Okay..." ๐คจ. Maybe it was his way of saying he wanted a better game, so I accepted. I tried to play better -- I wasn't a bad player. I deserve a fair shot! But when it was his turn, he potted the 8 ball again. I kind of resented that he was just throwing the game and "letting me" win. I found it extremely patronizing. I was highly skeptical. I couldn't figure out his angle! If I sucked so badly, why did he keep wanting a rematch?
I was signed in as "guest," (not through Facebook), so it wasn't like he was trying to slide into my dms. But he kept doing this! I kept accepting because I was curious to see where it would end. It was absurd!
Eventually, I caught on that he was letting me win to gift me chips/help my win percentage. He kept upping the ante, wanting to challenge me at higher and higher levels, and in the back of my mind I half-expected him to end up hustling me out of all of my chips for some sick thrill. But he didn't, and in the end, he let me win 12 times, gifting me with $200 000 chips from my original $238 simply to be nice! I'm still kind of in awe, but nevertheless, thank you, mysterious internet stranger! Your generosity without expecting any kind of reciprocation really made my day! ๐
Fall puts me in such a romantic mood. I just want to be cozy, flirt shamelessly, and be in that giggly, cuddly, secret place with someone for a while.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch โข No registration required โข HD streaming
When I was a kid, I absolutely LOVED The Sound of Music, but I secretly hated Captain von Trapp! I thought he was a big heartless meanie! And even after he had "changed", I couldn't understand what Maria saw in him. I would have been perfectly happy if Maria and the kids had kept having fun on their own indefinitely. As far as 7 or 8 year old me was concerned, the Baroness could HAVE him! Love either made you act like an idiot, like Liesl; a bougie bitch, like the Baroness; or a stiff, no-longer-fun, married grown up! No, thank you!
(swimming = fun; glowering = not fun)
Now that I'm older, I see more nuance in the captain and I understand why he is the way he is. He uses regimental order not only because it's familiar (from his navy days), but to make himself feel in control after the death of his wife. It's also why he gets so mad at Maria for disrupting this order. When people experience a sudden death, we often lose all sense of control. Order is his way of regaining that sense of control and safety. In his mind, he's doing his best to keep his kids safe and (whether rational or irrational) prevent the death of another loved one. But it doesn't mean he doesn't care. Also, seeing glimpses of his deceased wife in his children is probably a painful reminder that makes him feel guilty for his shortcomings as a single father (and maybe angry with her for leaving them). This is probably why he keeps his children at an emotional distance.
However, we still get glimpses of the captain early on. He's quick-witted, wry, and can be charming when he wants to be. He also has a sense of humour that we see even before Maria "softens" him. In a sense, Maria probably hasn't "changed" him, so much as she has reconnected him to the man he once was. (As you recall, he *used to* sing and play the guitar! It wasn't brand new).
He's also brave, honourable, and principled (but that part, I always understood). And not to be parched on main, but... I totally get it now! 1965 (and beyond) Christopher Plummer was a hot piece. Get it, Maria!
(Sir, yes sir!)
Every time a movie like The Lake House or The Notebook or whatever comes on, I roll my eyes and say 'I can't with this again.' But let it sit in my cue long enough and eventually I get sucked in all over again! I always get all dopey and grinny when the two end up together because the truth is I'm a soft girl who wears her cynicism like armour, and because I'm scared of getting hurt, of disappointment, and of reality not meeting expectations. And I resent these movies for exposing me as the vulnerable human being that I am (how dare they?). I guess I have *whispers* feelings. So I'll continue to sit here like an absolute SUCKER, watching those stupid, idiotic, beautiful, WONDERFUL things. Damnit!
Soooo.... Tumblr got rid of the beautiful, evocative, painstakingly curated art, and yet the porn bots persist like cockroaches after an atomic bomb. Coolcoolcool. Smort.