#studyrants

There are two things you could be trying to say when you say “cishet aces are not lgbt+,” and here they are:

1) “If you are ace, you are inherently lgbt+, unless you are cisgender and heteroromantic.” (That is, until I “discover” that you are cisgender and heteroromantic)

2) “If you are ace, you are not inherently lgbt+, but some lgbt people also are ace.” (That is, being ace is totally irrelevant to being lgbt+)

It’s a very minor distinction, but here’s my point. Let’s say you’re a “cishet ace exclusionist” (that’s aphobia, babey). Somebody walks up to you in lgbt+ space, or messages you on an lgbt+ forum, or whatever, and as a gatekeeping asshole it’s your job to discover if they are really lgbt+. 

They say, “Hi, my name’s Skylar, I’m asexual.” (It’s rare that somebody’s sexuality comes up so quickly, but for the sake of ease, let’s leave it like this.)

Is Skylar “not lgbt+”? Or do you not yet have enough information? Skylar could be a trans or nonbinary individual. Skylar could be bisexual or pansexual or gay.

Is your instinct “yes, Skylar is welcome here unless I find out that they are a ‘cishet’” or is your instinct “no, Skylar is not welcome here until they identify themselves using a different lgbt identity.” 

If your instinct is the first option, you’ve already essentially admitted that being ace is “enough” to make somebody lgbt. Skylar’s gender and sexuality don’t come up again, and Skylar has a great ace time with other lgbt+ people and carries on their life literally harming nobody, with their romantic orientation never becoming relevant. :) It’s not about “resources” and it’s not about privilege and it’s not about oppression, you’re just making it about hating on other-gender attraction of any kind: would you treat bi and pan individuals with other-gender partners (or attractions) this way? Would you treat trans individuals with other-gender partners (or attractions) this way? Don’t be a gatekeeping asshole, my friend.

If your instinct is the second option, you now have to get Skylar to “prove” that they are lgbt+, because you’re a piece of shit. By your standards, Skylar must be trans/nb or bi/pan/homoromantic to “prove” that they are lgbt+.

“I’m aromantic and cisgender,” Skylar says. “I actually desire no romantic or sexual relationship at all.”

Has Skylar “proved” that they are lgbt? They aren’t heteroromantic, after all. 

“Yeah, Skylar’s lgbt, because they aren’t heteroromantic.” So you’ve admitted that ace people are lgbt+ even if they are not also bi, trans, gay, or lesbian.

“No, Skylar’s not lgbt, because they are not bi/trans/gay/etc.” So then your argument “not cishet ones lmao” actually means nothing, because Skylar does not identify as “het” or experience other-gender attraction at all (not heterosexual, not heteroromantic, not het-anything). Hmmmm looks like it was just aphobia all along. 

That's the main roadblock for me.

When your life is this busy, you never can truly feel peace.

You can brew tea and sit by a window and read a book, but all the to-dos don't stop looming. You cannot be carefree.

I haven't had a single chance to be at peace for weeks on end and I know that it's not good for me.

I keep trying to achieve that feeling by self-care: cleaning my space, reading/writing/watching things I like, making tea over and over again, but it's all worthless until I can actually clear stressers out of my life and that's going to take a massive time commitment.

For now, I'm going to try to plunge in and stay in just until spring break, when I will finally have time. Lent starts this week, and I hope that through sacrifice I will reap more rewards. Giving up time on a screen to gain more time to work on tasks. Giving up unhealthy food to gain more strength in my body. Giving up stressing to gain inner peace.

Thomas is seen almost straight-on and has much more space to move than the sides. The objects behind him are at a distance while the sides (except Logan) have their backs to a wall. A fair amount of Thomas’ torso is visible, and combining that with the distance of the things behind him makes him appear a little bit tall. However, the top of his head is always in frame, unlike some of the sides. 

The camera frequently looks slightly down at Patton, which gives the illusion of a larger forehead/eyes (traits associated with cuteness and youth) and smaller shoulders. Think of the way many people take selfies from slightly above: It’s to enhance those features. This angle also makes Patton look smaller. You can always see the top of Patton’s head in the frame, but often not much of his torso.  The height of the blinds (and the fact that we usually can’t see where they begin or end) add to this effect. His body takes up very little of the frame, even when he is emoting with his hands. 

Roman is next to objects, usually the TV. He’s taller than these objects, which gives him the illusion of being tall. The broad shoulders of his costume make him appear to have broader shoulders (especially in the 2.0 outfit). His distance from the camera varies more frequently with his actions than any other side except maybe Virgil. His head is occasionally slightly cut out by the top of the frame, and he seems to take up more of the frame with his body than any other side except Virgil, who is very near the camera. Like Logan, he has good posture, but his emotiveness makes him vary his distance from the camera and he frequently crouches or bends forward to express emotion as well. In general I’d say his stance/posture/angle vary the most of all the sides.

With the exception of the very early appearances of Anxiety, Virgil is usually closer to the camera than any other side. When he leans forward to make a point, he’s very near the camera. Often the top of his head is out of frame. He is also seen at something close to a two-thirds angle while the other sides are usually facing (or close to facing) the camera. When Virgil does look at the camera, he’s not looking forward like Thomas, but looking slightly to the side (his right, the audience’s left). The fact that we so rarely see Anxiety straight-on is enough to make him appear different than the others in the audience’s mind’s eye. Very little of his torso is visible, and when he hunches his shoulders this effect is only magnified. Because we know he is standing on the stairs, he is raised above the camera (which makes his chin look slightly different than the other sides’) and he looks down at Patton and Logan, but seems to be fairly eye-level with Roman, which might be another contributing factor in Roman appearing tall. Finally, Virgil wears clothes that are too big for him, which makes him appear skinnier. 

For the life of me I can’t figure out why Logan always looks slimmer than the other sides, but there is usually a fair amount of his torso visible, and his excellent posture probably contributes to a sort of slimming effect as well. The top of his head is occasionally out of frame, making him appear a little taller. When he looks at Virgil, he looks slightly upward, but Virgil is raised above him by the stairs. The stairs are the only piece of setting “shared” by two sides. We can tell from its position that Virgil is above Logan (standing on a higher step). Logan is the only side with as much space behind him as Thomas. Take a look at his nearness to the camera compared to Roman when the two duet in Crofter’s: The Musical.