#stevexofc

Series:

Please do not post this work on any platform without my permission or falsely post without crediting me. The only characters I own are the ones I’ve made up!

Stuck in the Middle: Sarah is a scholarship recipient working at Stark Industries. Her job? To break the super-serum! But when she falls, literally, into the arms of those super soldiers, will she lose their trust when her work is stolen?

At this point, it’s PG (some swearing), smut to follow, but mostly fluff and some angst BuckyxOFCxSteve, BuckyxSteve, OFC, OFC!scientist, poly relationship

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Fangs and Roses: People are going missing in a small town off exit 17. The Winchester brothers catch wind of these disappearances and find themselves neck-deep in a blood-sucking situation they’ve never encountered before. And when Rose, the owner of a roadside bar Dean took a liking to, gets involved, they find an extra pair of hands can  be helpful.

This fic is rated PG13 for the majority of the series. Any additional ratings will be listed at the beginning of each chapter. Same for content warnings!

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L'Incendie de Mon Coeur (Fire of my Heart): After the Opera Populaire’s fire, only ruins remain. Madeleine is one of the surviving ballerinas. When she is thrown into the operahouse with her life at stake, she meets the infamous, Monsieur le Phantom, the unexpected hero.

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Oneshots:

Thicker Bikes: After helping her out with a nasty ex, Bucky invites Cara to join his crew, and later Loki for a very interesting night. 18+ This is pure smut, Biker!Bucky, Biker!Loki, MFM (AO3 link here)

The Music Box:A family heirloom, an old music box, opens the door to a life from long ago. PG, no warnings (AO3 link here)

Leather and Sunsets: I hadn’t been to a bar in a while, at least not voluntarily. Besides, I’d never had much luck finding someone there. That is- until I lock eyes with the most beautiful blue eyes I’ve ever seen. 18+, smut, Biker!OC, OFC (AO3 link here)

Steve pulled off his cap and scratched at his scalp, cringing at the new color of his hair. He’d done it before, but he didn’t enjoy it very much. At least this one would wash out in the next few days, unlike the last time he’d unknowingly bought the permanent dye. The satellite phone Stark had made was thin and sat almost weightlessly in the pocket of his old jeans. He slid it out and refreshed the connection.

Arrived at base 0723

The message was answered shortly after:

Location confirmed. Daily updates required

10-4.

He tossed the phone onto the bed and began to unpack the rucksack, pulling out his backup weapons and recon gear. The room he’d requested had an ample view of the factory across the street, where intel had suggested the majority of the trafficking took place. The old folding chair across the room made for a decent seat beside the window which he covered with the old blinds. There was no movement outside, so he busied himself with checking his weapons, confirming each weapon was loaded (the safety on of course), and each knife was clean and smooth.

From a nearly hidden side pocket, he pulled out the picture he’d taken just weeks before, Bucky, Sarah, and him smiling with the costumed character. He’d hated to leave so soon, but when Fury had shown him the few photos they were able to get from their source, he knew he wouldn’t stand idly by. They were mostly women and children, most of them being sold into sex work while others were sold as servants to richer families. Steve shook his head, trying to focus on his mission and pushed the images out of his mind. Bodies thin from not eating, skin pale from lack of light. After everything that had happened, from the war he’d fought in, to the invasion of New York, he wondered how people could still justify such inhumane actions.

Movement caught his eye and he grabbed the long range camera, careful not to move the blinds as he snapped photos of a lone man entering the old factory. He couldn’t get anything except a small profile of his face, but it might be helpful later on. He itched to leap out, knock down the doors, and rescue everyone inside, but as Natasha said on the plane ride over, even if he saved one hundred people, the traffickers would just find another hub to work from. Their goal was to get as much information as possible. Trade routes and faces that the UN could prosecute and hopefully dismantle these organizations. He’d give them the locations and a specialized team would rescue the victims. After all, there was too much diplomatic red tape for them to go barging into a country and hunting down the wrongdoers. Steve still didn’t like the idea of having to wait, but that was the way the world worked these days.

There wasn’t any movement for a while, and Steve’s stomach started to growl in protest. Locking up his gear, he slid one of the knives into his boot before pushing the rucksack under his bed and locking the door. The evening had grown chilly and he pulled his hoodie closer to him, observing the old town. A few shops were scattered around, some down side streets, others on the main road. A few buildings had small apartments on the second floors where music and cigarette smoke drifted out of the open windows.

He settled on a bar, nodding to the bartender as he sat at a table against the wall. A woman, probably in her sixties, approached his table, depositing a beer before him.

“What are you eating tonight?” She asked in the local dialect. Steve recognized some of it, but he’d only studied the mainstream language.

“Uh… something hot.” He replied.

“You are not from this town?” She changed to English, smiling at his relief.

“No,” Steve shook his head as he opened the beer. “My mother is. I’ve just come from seeing her.”

“Ah. Why did you leave?”

“She always said I was a traveller,” he shrugged, drawing a laugh from the woman.

“I’ll get you something hot to eat.” As she disappeared behind the bar, she shouted something in the local dialect that sounded a lot like foreigner wants stew, but he couldn’t be too sure. He didn’t have many options, but whatever was cooking in the back smelled good, even to his growling stomach. While he waited, he surveyed the bar, wondering if any of the traffickers came by. If there was anything he knew about men in business, it was that they liked to talk about it over alcohol. Not unlike Tony, he thought to himself, chuckling quietly as he sipped his beer.

It was bitter, and he knew Bucky would hate it. Part of him wished it was Bucky on this mission, especially with the language barrier, but he knew it would be too risky. He was still fairly well known, and the metal arm, though black and easier to conceal, would still be noticeable. Besides, he worried it would hit too close to home for him.

“Something hot,” the woman said, appearing beside him with a steaming bowl that smelled too good for how the place looked.

“Thanks,” he nodded and she disappeared back behind the bar, calling out a hello as two others entered. Steve blew on the hot stew in his spoon and took stock of the new people. Two males, one dark haired and stocky, the other bald and average height. At first, he thought they were just neighbors, but when the bald man began flipping through a large wad of cash, he had a feeling they were more than just neighbors. Careful not to draw attention to himself, he slid the phone out of his pocket and feigned a text, angling the camera to snap a few pictures of the two men. He’d gotten the bald man’s face, but not the dark haired man.

The group chatted in a mixture of the main language and local dialect for a few minutes, the conversation moving between the health of family members, the profits of the business, and the weather until they paused, asking the woman about Steve.

“Here to see his mother,” she shrugged. “Sounds American.” Steve took the opportunity to snap another picture as the turned around to eye him up. Steve only nodded toward them, noticing their stair and greeted them in the broken language.

“Good evening.” The duo chuckled and responded the same, apparently deeming him unthreatening. The stew was good and filling with beef, or maybe another meat, potatoes, and vegetables. He enjoyed the taste, taking in the old photographs on the walls as the men chatted at the bar. He picked up a couple of keywords, though they were spoken quietly; at least there was one benefit of the super soldier serum.

“Large shipment… midnight… three weeks…”

“How soon… sell… merchandise?”

“Business… coming… day after.”

“Good.”  With the business aside, they accepted the same stew and turned to other unimportant matters. Apparently they were soccer fans.

Steve finished his stew and approached the bar, handing the woman cash which she pocketed and thanked him in English. As he left, he felt two sets of eyes burn into his back.

Back in the hotel room, he pulled the satellite phone from his pocket and set a message.

Shipment said to arrive in three weeks. Potential buyer day after. Advise.

Steve sat back in the chair, watching the quiet building through the curtains and waited for an answer.

**

“I’m a scientist,” I teased. “I’m supposed to be thinking a lot.”

“That’s the problem. Baby, I told you he was okay. I saw a report this morning and he’s fine. There’s just some more information than he’d originally anticipated so we all decided to expand the mission.”

“You’d tell me if anything happened, right?” Reaching across the table, he took my hand in his and smiled, one side of his lips tilting upward.

“You know I would. I promise.”

“Okay,” I nodded, but he watched me and shook his head.

“It’s not a bad thing to be worried.” He began. “Sometimes, I can’t sleep if I’m not out there with him.”

“But you look so calm,” I countered. “And you guys have been together longer. I feel like I should be the one to comfort you!”

“We’ve been together, even if we didn’t really know it, since before the war. But that doesn’t mean that I still don’t get worried every time he leaves. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve known someone. If you’re this worried, then it shows us that you really do care.”

“I’m sorry.” I sighed, pushing my food around my plate. “I just… this is the first serious relationship I’ve been in since college.”

“Don’t be sorry,” Bucky replied. “Listen, I can’t tell you everything, but… I can tell you a little. Just don’t mention that I said anything, okay?” I nodded and leaned in as he began quietly. “I can tell you that he’s in Europe and that he’s observing a potential human trafficking ring we caught wind of a few weeks ago. He’s found what he thinks is their base of operations, but finding their travel routes is a bit of a challenge. That’s why it’s taking him so long to come back. They keep changing their routes and it’s hard to decipher their system. I can promise you that he’s not in any danger; it’s purely observation. He has no orders to interfere.”

“What about the people?” I asked.

“Trust me. We’re tracking each shipment and we have teams out to grab them before anything can happen. That’s really all I can tell you. The logistics are boring and the location has to be kept secret.”

“Thank you for telling me.” I took his hand across the table as he sat back in his seat. “I really appreciate it. I didn’t doubt you when you said he was safe, it’s just that I tend to worry a little too much sometimes.”

“Trust me, doll. In our line of work, it’s always good to be extra worried.”

***

It had to be a fluke; Bruce was actually joining me for lunch. When he poked his head into the lab, I’d expected him to check on my progress. Instead, he suggested I take a break and visit the cafeteria with him. It was a bit earlier than I’d gotten used to, but I knew Wanda and Sam would be there soon to join. As Bruce and I took a spot by the window, I glanced around, searching for my usual lunch-mates.

“Where’s Renee?” I asked and he shrugged.

“She’s got a department meeting today. Something about a new piece of equipment they got in. Even though we work for Stark, we still have to go with the regular OSHA standards.” I nodded, glancing over to the entrance where Sam and Wanda were searching. I waved them over with a smile.

“What are you guys working on? Other than her help with the decoding, I mean.”

“Basically, she’s helping me engineer some flexible armour and clothes for me. I’ve destroyed more clothes and shoes than I’d like to. Besides, I want something that I can wear even when I’m not the Hulk, just in case.” We greeted Sam and Wanda who’d finally joined us with their own food. “We’re using some of the nano-bots that Tony made and integrating them with hyper flexible fabric.”

“So Hulk gets a super-suit?” Sam asked and Bruce nodded. “Tony and I were talking about implementing them in my wings in case they’re broken. Those things are awesome.”

It was nice having Bruce back for lunch; I enjoyed Renee’s company, but watching him with the others was more fun. Wanda and Sam caught us up on the new recruits, sharing a few mishaps they’d run into during combat training.

“We definitely have an enhanced recruit,” Wanda added. “I’m trying to figure out who, but it’s a bit hard.”

“Do you know their power yet?” I asked and she shook her head. “How can you tell?”

“There’s a different sort of energy field around when we’re with the group; it almost feels like instinct to know they’re there. We’ve only been able to split them into smaller groups. I don’t want to force them out, but I’d like to know what skills we’re working with. Who knows, they may have something unique to add to the group.” With a sigh, she turned back to Sam.

“You haven’t noticed anything yet, have you?” Sam shook his head.

“I don’t think it’s a strength thing. Everyone is working as hard as they can. Same for injuries; we’ve seen normal reactions to blows, even if they’re not extremely tough. I think it may be something in the psychic way.”

Wanda nodded. “I think so too. I don’t like to probe into people's’ minds or else I’d find out who it is faster, but I feel that would destroy all trust they have in us.”

“So it’s a waiting game, then?” I asked and Wanda nodded. “What kind of training do you guys do?”

Sam shrugged. “We do physical training, so strength, dexterity, speed. We do combat too- hand to hand, basic weapons. Once we feel they’re ready, we bring in some tactical skills like analysing hostile situations, how to approach entering a building. That sort of thing.”

Wanda continued: “Once they pass us, we send them over to Steve and Bucky who determine what their ultimate duties will be, whether that be tech or ground support.”

“Oh God,” I chuckled, “I’d never make it as an agent here.”

“Oh come on,” Sam answered, nudging me in the ribs. “I’m sure you’d do great.”

“I have zero strength, zero coordination, and FRIDAY scares the crap out of me half the time. I think I’ll stay in the lab.”

Wanda waived my concern away. “You’ve got your power up here,” she motioned to her brain. “And you’ve got us.”

“If you ever want to learn how to throw a punch, I’ll be here.” I smiled in thanks to them and watched as they continued their theorizing.

**

“Honey, I’m home,” I called, following him into the apartment. From across the room, Bucky laughed.

“Hey sweetheart.” Steve pulled me into a tight hug and kissed my cheek. “Buck’s in the kitchen. He said you came down at lunch today?”

“Hm? Yeah.” I followed Steve to find Bucky peeking into the window of the oven. “Hey doll! Give me a second. I think these are done…”

“What are you making?” I asked, standing behind him to sniff. There were two pots on the stove as well, one large, one small, and their dining room table was set with three place settings. “What’s all this?”

“We’re making you dinner,” Steve replied.

“Wait, what? Why?” Bucky laughed at my confusion as he stirred something in the large pot.

“Because it was your first day and we wanted to surprise you.” He held the wooden spoon out to Steve who plucked the piece of pasta off and tossed it into his mouth.

“Perfect,” he nodded.

“Is there anything I can do?” I asked and they both shook their heads.

“You might want to move though.” Steve said, shifting me out of the way. “Wouldn’t want you get burned.” I did as he asked and watched the two of them work together, straining the pasta and mixing in the sauce. I cringed, however, as Bucky reached into the oven with his metal hand to retrieve the biscuits, but he only winked; I guess it didn’t hurt him. When they’d finished, I followed them to the table where they filled the plates and handed out beers. They each sat on opposite sides of the table, leaving the middle seat for me.

“Guys, you didn’t have to do this, really!” I said as Bucky spooned some pasta onto my plate.

“We don’t have to do anything we don’t want to, Sarah.” Steve smiled at me over his beer. “Besides, you didn’t eat much this morning and I have a feeling you didn’t eat much at lunch either.”

“I was nervous,” I shrugged.

“So how was it?” Bucky asked, digging in. The pasta smelled so good and I dumped some mozzarella cheese on top of my plate before taking a bite.

“Guys, this is so good!” I said, covering my full mouth. “Thank you so much!”

“You’re very welcome,” Steve replied. “How was your first day?”

“Honestly? It was a bit overwhelming,” I began, “but Bruce is really nice and really passionate about his work. I think once I get used to the layout of the lab and his methods, I’ll be a bit more comfortable.”

“Passionate isn’t the word for Bruce,” Bucky laughed. “It sounds like you enjoyed it though. And he’s a good guy. He’ll help you out.”

“I can tell it’s going to be a really great experience. Oh- and have you seen half the equipment in the labs? It’s insane!”

“Doll, I’m still getting over half the new technology I’ve missed,” Bucky laughed. “But yeah, Bruce has brought us in there a few times. We’ve given him some blood and tissue samples to help with his research.”

“Tony really doesn’t cut corners, does he?” I laughed.

“Tony’s not the kind of guy to buy discount,” Steve nodded. “But he’s a good guy when we wants to be.”

“So how was your guys day?” Bucky and Steve shrugged. “Come on, what do you guys do during your day?”

“We train,” Bucky shrugged. “That, and when there’s a mission to complete, we go. But otherwise, we train and help train the new SHIELD agents.”

“SHIELD is still being rebuilt,” Steve added, “We work with Directory Fury on most of that, but Stark puts us up here since most of our equipment is stored safely here. In case of emergency, we can just suit up and run out from here.”

“What kind of missions do you guys do?” Steve and Bucky exchanged nervous glances. “Just like general stuff? I know you can’t really discuss any super secret things.”

Steve answered: “Sometimes we do reconnaissance, gather information on potentially dangerous groups, or check on the progress of humanitarian aid.”

“I was out a few weeks ago to help escort some aid workers through a pretty dangerous place.” Bucky shook his head. “I don’t get it. They’re killing each other and harming people who are just trying to live their lives. And the aid workers are risking theirs to try to help people stuck in the middle of all this.” His grip on his fork tightened, and I reached out, laying my hand over his.

“I’m sorry, Buck. I didn’t mean to upset you.” After a moment, he relaxed and placed the fork beside his plate. “Hey, you’re doing some amazing things. Look, you protected those aid workers. And you helped get supplies to those people in need. Yeah, it’s terrible that people are fighting, but you made a difference to those people who need help. And you gave them hope, which is stronger than any weapon.” The room fell silent, Steve watching us intently before Bucky took a deep breath and opened his eyes. I was so scared that I’d said something stupid and upset him more, but when he wrapped his metal hand around mine, I felt better. It was a touchy topic for him, and judging by the way Steve now sat rigid in his seat, it was the same for him too. I made a mental note to keep the work talk to a minimum. I wanted desperately to ask if he was okay, to wrap my arms around him and make him feel better, but the way he held my hand made me pause.

“Buck?” Steve asked, his voice quiet as he appraised his friend.

“I’m okay,” Bucky replied. “Sorry-”

“Please don’t apologize,” I interjected, wrapping both my hands around his. “I didn’t think.”

“It’s alright, Sarah,” Bucky offered a small smile before returning to his dinner. I kept one hand on his, which he seemed okay with, and resumed eating, glancing over at Steve for approval. We ate in silence for a few minutes until Bucky spoke up. “Did he tell you what he did today?” I paused, anxious for his next words, but Steve sighed across the table, and Bucky laughed.

“No?”

“Come on, Buck-” Steve wined playfully.

“Got into a fight with a self-checkout at the grocery store.” Bucky answered. It took me a second to process his words, but when I glanced over at Steve, I couldn’t hold back the my laughter. It wasn’t the story, or how he’d made a fool of himself against a machine. It was the way he blushed and how Bucky seemed to laugh a bit more genuinely as the night went on.

“There was nothing in the bagging area!” Steve sighed, exasperated. “I don’t think I can go back to that store ever again.”

“So what did you do?” I asked, watching as Steve glared over at Bucky.

“Well this one just stood there and laughed,” he shook his head. “But I kept having to ask the girl to come over and swipe her card thing.”

“Ask him how many times this happened,” Bucky offered, leaning closer to me. I looked over at Steve who hid his face in his hands, but when he didn’t answer, Bucky did. “Three. He had to ask her to fix it three times.”

“I hate technology!”

“Steve,” I said, trying to hold back my laughter. “Those things hate everyone. If it makes you feel better, I’ve actually shouted at one of them… and there actually was something in the bagging area I’d forgotten about.” Bucky’s eyes widened at my confession and offered a genuine stomach laugh, leaning back in his chair. Steve met my gaze, and I couldn’t help but smile at each of them.

The rest of dinner was filled with good conversation, them asking about my college days, which were nothing really to talk about, and my asking them about life before everything. They fought me when I moved to wash the dishes, but gave in when I refused to relent. It wasn’t long before we’d finished and settled onto the couch, our arms and hands intertwined with each other. Steve pulled my legs onto his lap as Bucky settled me against his chest. It felt so natural as I relaxed against him and drew lazy patterns onto the back of Steve’s hand. Bucky did the same, his fingers drawing across my arm, enticing a yawn from deep within me. It was almost 8:30 by then, and I was so torn between dozing off right where I was and doing the responsible thing- going back to my apartment to shower and sleep. Steve seemed to notice my internal battle, because he picked my hand up and pressed it to his lips.

“Come on, you look exhausted.”

“I’m fine,” I argued, but another giant yawn gave me away.

“Come on, doll,” Bucky’s voice rumbled in my ear and I sighed.

“Alright.” Slowly, I stood, stretching until I heard a few cracks and pops. Bucky and Steve walked me to the door where I turned, ready to say good night, but Steve paused.

“I’m walking you back.”

“I think I can make it,” I replied, but he insisted. Maybe it was his old fashioned way, but I couldn’t help but like it, even just a little. Bucky gave me a tight hug and pressed his lips to mine, gently and just for a moment. It was quick, but it made my stomach quiver nervously and I smiled up at him. “Thanks so much for dinner. I mean it, you guys are the best.”

“It’s our pleasure, doll,” Bucky replied with a tired smile. Steve took my hand and lead me down the hallway and into the elevator. I leaned against the back railing, watching the number above the door descend. I could see it in his body language that he wanted to say something, but when he stayed silent, I took the first step.

“I screwed that up. I’m sorry.” Steve turned to face me, his face a mixture of guilt and sadness.

“No, you didn’t do anything wrong.” The elevator doors opened and we walked quietly toward my room. I lead him inside and he sat beside me on the couch.

“I didn’t mean to upset you guys.”

“Sarah, you didn’t know. You wouldn’t have known.” Steve replied. “Me and Buck, we’ve been through a lot together. He’s doing better than he was before, but both of us still have our moments.” He paused for a moment, weighing his next words. “PTSS is… tough. At first, both me and him knew how obvious it was that we were so shaken up. We’ve both had a lot of help, both from our friends and with each other. It’s just… it’s not something that’s easy to see, especially now that we’ve gotten a bit better at coping.”

“It’s an invisible illness,” I nodded. “I know.”

“That’s what everyone is calling it.” Steve nodded. “There are good days, and there are not so good days, and Buck’s been having more good than not so good lately.”

“Is this… are we going to make things worse?”

“Not at all. If anything, it’ll help. If this were a few years back, then maybe things wouldn’t be so good. But he’s gotten better. And having someone who can be sympathetic to that helps, especially since that someone’s sympathy is genuine. He really likes you. I really like you. I just wanted you to know that sometimes, things get hard.”

“Steve… I’m not going anywhere. You guys mean so much to me. I never thought I’d say that to someone, especially two someones so quickly, but there’s something about you guys that just clicks with me. You guys feel like home to me. So if there’s ever anything I can do, tell me.”

Steve smiled down at me and pressed a gentle kiss against my lips, just as Bucky did. “Sarah, we’re both sweet on you. And I appreciate what you said, and how you handled everything at dinner. We’re here too. And we’ve got you, just as you’ve got us. Okay?”

“Yeah.” Steve gave me one last kiss before heading out, leaving me to fall asleep before I could process anything else. But one thing passed through my mind before I drifted off: I was caught up with them, and I had a feeling my crush was just the beginning.

---

It was late when I finally rolled out of bed, my dreams rotating between a comfortable nothingness and the judging faces of the people back home. Anxiety coiled and settled in my stomach, weighing it down like I’d swallowed stones. I hated my anxiety. It was a burden and a pain, especially when it really made itself known. Would they care?

After dressing, I made my way down to the cafeteria, collecting some eggs, toast, and coffee. I chose a table in the corner where I could sit quietly and attempt to gather my thoughts. I didn’t see them, but Bucky had a kitchen in his apartment. As I ate, I flipped through my phone, returning to the picture we took in Times Square. I had fun that day, but that was when I thought Steve was pursuing me. Now, I had them both to think of. Was that something I could handle? Truthfully, I wasn’t sure I could even handle myself at this point, but I felt a connection with them that I hadn’t before in my few previous relationships. But what if things went south? I wanted to believe that they’d be okay, and we could be friends, but everyone says that and no one really follows through with it. And if I was going to keep working here after my dissertation, which was months away…

I had months until my dissertation was finished. What harm could be done if we tried this new relationship out for a few weeks? Truthfully, I was nervous, and not just because it was one more person than I was used to, but because I feared their rejection. And that told me everything; if I was nervous about them leaving, then maybe I really did want this. My phone lit up, pulling me from my thoughts.

Steve: Hey, are you up yet?

Me: Yeah, just finishing breakfast.

Steve: Do you want to come up when you’re done?

Me: Sure. Be up soon.

I took a few more minutes, finishing my last bits of cold toast before I was in the elevator heading up to Bucky’s room. I’d barely knocked on the door once before it opened, Bucky meeting me with a warm smile that pushed all of my doubt and anxiety away.

I was doomed.

Steve was already there, sitting with his feet up as he sipped some coffee, but he stood as I came in, wrapping me in a big hug after Bucky did the same. They led me to the kitchen where I took a seat at the breakfast bar, my hands wrapped around a fresh cup of coffee. This time, the silence was awkward. I felt so comfortable around them, but I still had that nagging weight in my stomach that wouldn’t go away.

“Can someone say something?” Bucky asked, glancing between me and Steve.

“Yeah, please,” I laughed, and Steve cleared his throat.

“So I guess you have some questions?” I nodded.

“I just…” Sighing, I rubbed my sweaty hands across my jeans. “I need to know that this is real. That you guys aren’t doing this to cover anything up, or… I just need to know why you guys want this.”

Bucky glanced at Steve who nodded for him to answer. “Sarah, Steve and I love each other, we have for years. And even with that love, we feel like something, or someone, has been missing from our life together. We’ve been talking about maybe bringing someone into our relationship for about a year now and since we both really like you, and it seems that you like us, we wanted to ask you to join us.” When I didn’t reply, Steve continued:

“If you’re thinking that we want you around to cover up our relationship, there couldn’t be anything farther from the truth. We’re pretty open about it with everyone we know. We don’t go around broadcasting our private business, but our friends know and that’s all that really matters. We’re both new to the idea of having a poly relationship, so we’d take it a day at a time.” Gently placing his hand on mine, he continued. “The three of us would have to be comfortable with everything. There’s always going to be compromise and communication, but the most important part is that we are all comfortable with the relationship.”

“What is it that’s making you so nervous?” Bucky asked. I knew this would come up. Well, I might as well get it out of the way now.

“I lived in a really conservative area.” I began. “You know, the whole pray the gay away bull. And I dated this guy in high school and through most of college. I thought that we would have a life together. We were committed, and I respected his wanting to wait until we got married to be physical. That’s how I was raised, at least, but I never understood the obsession with someone’s sexuality. Anyway… one day on summer break, we meet up for some lunch in town.” I could feel the heat rising to my face and tried to push it away, taking my hand back from Steve. “He told me that he’d been using me to lie to his family. That he’d known he was gay since he was a kid. In the beginning, he said that he needed to make sure that he wasn’t suspected, but once he was in college, he didn’t know how to break it off with me. Once he’d found some freedom away from his family, he was able to meet someone. I asked him why he didn’t just tell me from the start and he said that he was afraid of what I’d think. I mean… we’d talked about this kind of stuff all the time when we were together; I was always a supporter, though I had to keep it quiet from my family, and he knew this.

“He used me for years, took advantage of my affection for him. He was my best friend, and when it came out, and he left the college to move out of state with his partner, my whole community, and even my parents blamed me. It was like I’d given him some illness or that something was wrong with me. I was shunned, my parents were shunned. I mean, I’m happy he found someone. And I’m happy he can be true to himself, but to use me for all of those years.” I scoffed, cupping the coffee mug in my hands. “He could have asked; I’d have done anything for him. But since then, I’ve had a hard time really having relationships because I don’t know what’s true and what’s not.

“I went on a few dates after that, but nothing felt right. After college, I started working on my post-grad and met a really nice guy. I thought that finally I found someone I could stay with, at least for a while. But he took advantage of me- he cheated on me and played me to the point that it was my fault for his infidelity because I was a virgin and honestly nervous about being intimate. So honestly, I’m really scared that it’ll happen again. I’ve already lost my family’s support for my research; they have this ridiculous notion that it’s ‘playing God’ even though I’ve explained it so many times. So that’s it. The whole thing. That’s why I’m really hesitant. Not because I think that who you are is wrong, or what you want is wrong, but because I’ve been hurt so many times, I don’t think I can handle it again.”

I didn’t want to look at them; I knew that after all that, they’d probably call off the whole thing. We could be friends, god knows I really liked them both and enjoyed their company, but would they look at me the same way? I didn’t realize I was crying until I felt a hand on my back, guiding me to rest my head on a strong shoulder.

“Doll,” Bucky began, “we lived during that. And we know how that kid must have felt, but there was no reason for him to lie to you. Look at me?” Slowly I lifted my eyes to him and he smiled. “I promise that I will never lie to you. And I promise that this isn’t some ruse and that we won’t pressure you in to anything you don’t want. All I want is someone to share my love with.”

“Same here, sweetheart,” Steve added, leaning against the counter beside me. “We both love each other, and we want to share our love with someone special. We’re not asking you to dive into this blindly. And we’re not asking you to do anything that you’re not comfortable with. If you want to try this, then we can. And if not, or if it doesn’t feel right, then we’ll stay friends. Because we both really like you.”

“I feel like such an idiot,” I sighed, covering my face. “I can’t believe I said all that out loud. I don’t think I’ve ever really told anyone the whole story.”

“Don’t say that,” Steve replied, “You’re not an idiot. You were hurt, and you were taken advantage of. I promise that we won’t do that. That’s not who we are.”

“Captain Good-Guy over here,” Bucky laughed, nudging me playfully. “He’d never hurt anyone.”

“And you guys? This won’t separate you?” I asked and they shook their heads.

“Nah,” Bucky replied. “We’ll work out the kinks. What do you say? Want to try?”

“I do,” I nodded. “So where do we start?” Bucky released me, just a bit, taking the seat beside me to keep his arm around my shoulders.

“Well, maybe we should go on some dates? Hang out some more?” Steve replied.

“And they don’t always have be all of us together,” Bucky added. “Sometimes we’ll go out, or you and Stevie’ll go out, and maybe I’ll take him.”

“That sounds fair. But I have one request.” I said. “No lies. No hiding anything, no omitting anything, nothing like that. I want honesty.”

“Sounds fair to me.” Steve nodded and Bucky agreed. “So what do you say? Want to stay here and watch some tv?”

“Maybe take a nap?” Bucky teased, but I nudged him back.

***

At first, it did feel a bit weird. I was raised on heterosexual monogamy, so finding myself not only having a crush on, but being with two guys (who also loved each other) was a new experience. They were so comfortable with each other that they always seemed to ease my anxiety. And I was wanted, not by someone who’d take advantage of me, but by two people who cared greatly for me. We were nowhere near the L word, but I knew that I really did care for them more than I’d cared for anyone in the past.

When Monday rolled around, I was out of bed insanely early, showered, dressed, and pacing. I knew I should get downstairs to eat something, but my stomach didn’t want to hold anything except the ten ton rock of nerves that currently weighed me down. I was taken by surprise when there was a knock at my door, and when I peeked through the peephole, I saw that it was my guys. Why were they up so early?

“Morning,” I smiled, kissing them each on the cheek as they shuffled into my room. “Why are you up this early?”

“We came to make sure you ate something before going up to meet Bruce,” Bucky replied, leaning against the doorframe.

“You guys don’t have to do that,” I replied. “I’m fine.”

“Did you eat?”

“Um…” Steve shook his head.

“Come on. Food. Now.”

Bucky pushed away from the wall and took my hand. “Come on, he won’t take no for an answer.” Gathering my things, I followed them out and into the hall. I was so antsy that Bucky began to rub my back, soothing my worry.

“I don’t know if it’s excitement or nervousness.” I sighed.

“Well you’ve met Bruce,” Steve added, “and you watched all those videos, and it sounded like you two discussed your research on Saturday, so I think you’re excited.”

“It’s hard to tell the difference sometimes,” I replied. “But yeah it’s probably excitement.” The elevator doors opened and we made our way into the cafeteria where I filled my plate with some eggs and toast. But when I went to get coffee, Bucky pushed me toward the decaf, whispering:

“You’re already antsy enough. Let’s not do caffeine, huh?” I laughed and complied. Honestly, maybe he was right. They kept me distracted with talks about recent sparring matches and stories from their time back before the war; I loved watching them interact, the way their eyes traced each other’s faces with such love that I almost envied them. They had been through so much, and to keep their love for each other through it all was amazing.

“Right, Sarah?” I snapped out of my thoughts to find them waiting on my response.

“Oh… uh…”

“I told you she was spacing out,” Bucky chuckled, nudging Steve. “All those old war stories put people to sleep!”

“No, I’m sorry! I was just… thinking.”

“Anything good?” Bucky winked and I blushed.

“Not really,” I shrugged. “I really should be going though. It’s getting late and I do not want to be late on my first day!”

---

“What are you making?” I asked, standing behind him to sniff. There were two pots on the stove as well, one large, one small, and their dining room table was set with three place settings. “What’s all this?”

“We’re making you dinner,” Steve replied.

“Wait, what? Why?” Bucky laughed at my confusion as he stirred something in the large pot.

“Because it was your first day and we wanted to surprise you.” He held the wooden spoon out to Steve who plucked the piece of pasta off and tossed it into his mouth.

“Perfect,” he nodded.

“Is there anything I can do?” I asked and they both shook their heads.

“You might want to move though.” Steve said, shifting me out of the way. “Wouldn’t want you get burned.” I did as he asked and watched the two of them work together, straining the pasta and mixing in the sauce. I cringed, however, as Bucky reached into the oven with his metal hand to retrieve the biscuits, but he only winked; I guess it didn’t hurt him. When they’d finished, I followed them to the table where they filled the plates and handed out beers. They each sat on opposite sides of the table, leaving the middle seat for me.

“Guys, you didn’t have to do this, really!” I said as Bucky spooned some pasta onto my plate.

“We don’t have to do anything we don’t want to, Sarah.” Steve smiled at me over his beer. “Besides, you didn’t eat much this morning and I have a feeling you didn’t eat much at lunch either.”

“I was nervous,” I shrugged.

“So how was it?” Bucky asked, digging in. The pasta smelled so good and I dumped some mozzarella cheese on top of my plate before taking a bite.

“Guys, this is so good!” I said, covering my full mouth. “Thank you so much!”

“You’re very welcome,” Steve replied. “How was your first day?”

“Honestly? It was a bit overwhelming,” I began, “but Bruce is really nice and really passionate about his work. I think once I get used to the layout of the lab and his methods, I’ll be a bit more comfortable.”

“Passionate isn’t the word for Bruce,” Bucky laughed. “It sounds like you enjoyed it though. And he’s a good guy. He’ll help you out.”

“I can tell it’s going to be a really great experience. Oh- and have you seen half the equipment in the labs? It’s insane!”

“Doll, I’m still getting over half the new technology I’ve missed,” Bucky laughed. “But yeah, Bruce has brought us in there a few times. We’ve given him some blood and tissue samples to help with his research.”

“Tony really doesn’t cut corners, does he?” I laughed.

“Tony’s not the kind of guy to buy discount,” Steve nodded. “But he’s a good guy when we wants to be.”

“So how was your guys day?” Bucky and Steve shrugged. “Come on, what do you guys do during your day?”

“We train,” Bucky shrugged. “That, and when there’s a mission to complete, we go. But otherwise, we train and help train the new SHIELD agents.”

“SHIELD is still being rebuilt,” Steve added, “We work with Directory Fury on most of that, but Stark puts us up here since most of our equipment is stored safely here. In case of emergency, we can just suit up and run out from here.”

“What kind of missions do you guys do?” Steve and Bucky exchanged nervous glances. “Just like general stuff? I know you can’t really discuss any super secret things.”

Steve answered: “Sometimes we do reconnaissance, gather information on potentially dangerous groups, or check on the progress of humanitarian aid.”

“I was out a few weeks ago to help escort some aid workers through a pretty dangerous place.” Bucky shook his head. “I don’t get it. They’re killing each other and harming people who are just trying to live their lives. And the aid workers are risking theirs to try to help people stuck in the middle of all this.” His grip on his fork tightened, and I reached out, laying my hand over his.

“I’m sorry, Buck. I didn’t mean to upset you.” After a moment, he relaxed and placed the fork beside his plate. “Hey, you’re doing some amazing things. Look, you protected those aid workers. And you helped get supplies to those people in need. Yeah, it’s terrible that people are fighting, but you made a difference to those people who need help. And you gave them hope, which is stronger than any weapon.” The room fell silent, Steve watching us intently before Bucky took a deep breath and opened his eyes. I was so scared that I’d said something stupid and upset him more, but when he wrapped his metal hand around mine, I felt better. It was a touchy topic for him, and judging by the way Steve now sat rigid in his seat, it was the same for him too. I made a mental note to keep the work talk to a minimum. I wanted desperately to ask if he was okay, to wrap my arms around him and make him feel better, but the way he held my hand made me pause.

“Buck?” Steve asked, his voice quiet as he appraised his friend.

“I’m okay,” Bucky replied. “Sorry-”

“Please don’t apologize,” I interjected, wrapping both my hands around his. “I didn’t think.”

“It’s alright, Sarah,” Bucky offered a small smile before returning to his dinner. I kept one hand on his, which he seemed okay with, and resumed eating, glancing over at Steve for approval. We ate in silence for a few minutes until Bucky spoke up. “Did he tell you what he did today?” I paused, anxious for his next words, but Steve sighed across the table, and Bucky laughed.

“No?”

“Come on, Buck-” Steve wined playfully.

“Got into a fight with a self-checkout at the grocery store.” Bucky answered. It took me a second to process his words, but when I glanced over at Steve, I couldn’t hold back the my laughter. It wasn’t the story, or how he’d made a fool of himself against a machine. It was the way he blushed and how Bucky seemed to laugh a bit more genuinely as the night went on.

“There was nothing in the bagging area!” Steve sighed, exasperated. “I don’t think I can go back to that store ever again.”

“So what did you do?” I asked, watching as Steve glared over at Bucky.

“Well this one just stood there and laughed,” he shook his head. “But I kept having to ask the girl to come over and swipe her card thing.”

“Ask him how many times this happened,” Bucky offered, leaning closer to me. I looked over at Steve who hid his face in his hands, but when he didn’t answer, Bucky did. “Three. He had to ask her to fix it three times.”

“I hate technology!”

“Steve,” I said, trying to hold back my laughter. “Those things hate everyone. If it makes you feel better, I’ve actually shouted at one of them… and there actually was something in the bagging area I’d forgotten about.” Bucky’s eyes widened at my confession and offered a genuine stomach laugh, leaning back in his chair. Steve met my gaze, and I couldn’t help but smile at each of them.

The rest of dinner was filled with good conversation, them asking about my college days, which were nothing really to talk about, and my asking them about life before everything. They fought me when I moved to wash the dishes, but gave in when I refused to relent. It wasn’t long before we’d finished and settled onto the couch, our arms and hands intertwined with each other. Steve pulled my legs onto his lap as Bucky settled me against his chest. It felt so natural as I relaxed against him and drew lazy patterns onto the back of Steve’s hand. Bucky did the same, his fingers drawing across my arm, enticing a yawn from deep within me. It was almost 8:30 by then, and I was so torn between dozing off right where I was and doing the responsible thing- going back to my apartment to shower and sleep. Steve seemed to notice my internal battle, because he picked my hand up and pressed it to his lips.

“Come on, you look exhausted.”

“I’m fine,” I argued, but another giant yawn gave me away.

“Come on, doll,” Bucky’s voice rumbled in my ear and I sighed.

“Alright.” Slowly, I stood, stretching until I heard a few cracks and pops. Bucky and Steve walked me to the door where I turned, ready to say good night, but Steve paused.

“I’m walking you back.”

“I think I can make it,” I replied, but he insisted. Maybe it was his old fashioned way, but I couldn’t help but like it, even just a little. Bucky gave me a tight hug and pressed his lips to mine, gently and just for a moment. It was quick, but it made my stomach quiver nervously and I smiled up at him. “Thanks so much for dinner. I mean it, you guys are the best.”

“It’s our pleasure, doll,” Bucky replied with a tired smile. Steve took my hand and lead me down the hallway and into the elevator. I leaned against the back railing, watching the number above the door descend. I could see it in his body language that he wanted to say something, but when he stayed silent, I took the first step.

“I screwed that up. I’m sorry.” Steve turned to face me, his face a mixture of guilt and sadness.

“No, you didn’t do anything wrong.” The elevator doors opened and we walked quietly toward my room. I lead him inside and he sat beside me on the couch.

“I didn’t mean to upset you guys.”

“Sarah, you didn’t know. You wouldn’t have known.” Steve replied. “Me and Buck, we’ve been through a lot together. He’s doing better than he was before, but both of us still have our moments.” He paused for a moment, weighing his next words. “PTSS is… tough. At first, both me and him knew how obvious it was that we were so shaken up. We’ve both had a lot of help, both from our friends and with each other. It’s just… it’s not something that’s easy to see, especially now that we’ve gotten a bit better at coping.”

“It’s an invisible illness,” I nodded. “I know.”

“That’s what everyone is calling it.” Steve nodded. “There are good days, and there are not so good days, and Buck’s been having more good than not so good lately.”

“Is this… are we going to make things worse?”

“Not at all. If anything, it’ll help. If this were a few years back, then maybe things wouldn’t be so good. But he’s gotten better. And having someone who can be sympathetic to that helps, especially since that someone’s sympathy is genuine. He really likes you. I really like you. I just wanted you to know that sometimes, things get hard.”

“Steve… I’m not going anywhere. You guys mean so much to me. I never thought I’d say that to someone, especially two someones so quickly, but there’s something about you guys that just clicks with me. You guys feel like home to me. So if there’s ever anything I can do, tell me.”

Steve smiled down at me and pressed a gentle kiss against my lips, just as Bucky did. “Sarah, we’re both sweet on you. And I appreciate what you said, and how you handled everything at dinner. We’re here too. And we’ve got you, just as you’ve got us. Okay?”

“Yeah.” Steve gave me one last kiss before heading out, leaving me to fall asleep before I could process anything else. But one thing passed through my mind before I drifted off: I was caught up with them, and I had a feeling my crush was just the beginning.

---