"you were sat in my reserved train seat and refused to move so i sat on your lap and now weâre both too annoyed and awkwardly turned on to move sterek au"
okay i donât really know how reserved seating on trains works, so letâs change that to seat-i-always-sit-in
excuse stiles being a jerk; heâs having a bad day
âExcuse me,â a man says, looking down at Derek. âThatâs myseat.â
Derekâs been taking a train to work for the past four years,and there are several things he knows about them; you donât talk to strangers,if there are no seats then you shut up and stand, and only the luxury sectionshave reserved seating. Now, while Derek normally takes a different train, todayheâs visiting Laura and this is his train,and this is his seat, and he is most certainlynot getting out of it. Especially because he may not have noticed that therewas gum on it till he sat down, and thereâs no way heâs standing on a trainfull of people with pink bubblegum stuck to his ass.
Rather than explaining all that to this random jerk, he says,âI was here first,â and goes back to reading his newspaper.
âUm, no,â the guys says, and his voice conveys that heâsstruggling to keep his cool. Which, really, is ridiculous. âI was here first.â
âReally?â Derek asks, setting the paper in his lap and raisingan eyebrow in mock surprise. âBecause I couldâve sworn I sat here three stopsago, and havenât moved since.â
Looking at him now, Derek is annoyed to see how cute the guyis. His hair is dark, his eyes are a bright whiskey color, and parts of hisface and neck are covered in little moles. It would be a lot easier to arguewith someone who isnât exactly his type. The universe is really out to get himtoday.
âListen,â the man says. âI am having a shitty, shitty day,and youâre sitting in my seat, and I need you to get up.â
Normally Derek might comply just to make the guy go away,but again, heâs sitting in gum, so,no. Heâs just going to have to deal with it.
âThere are no other seats,â Derek points out, glancingaround the train.
âWhich is why I want that one.â
âWhich is why Iwant this one.â
âOkay, well, itâs mine. I ride this train at this exact timeevery single day, and this is my seat.â He grabs the shoulder of a blonde womanwearing a gold necklace that reads Erica,sitting two rows down, whoâs watching them not-so-surreptitiously. âYou ride thistrain a lot. Is that not always my seat?â
âIt is,â she says, smirking a little. âBut he was therefirst.â
âUgh,â he groans, turning back to Derek. âThat doesnât meananything. Itâs mine.â
âI donât see your name on it,â Derek says, which might be abit childish, but so is this guy. Maybe itâs the way to get through to him.
âFine,â he says, pulling off his backpack and diggingthrough it till he produces a black Sharpie. He leans down, and when Derekmoves the tiniest bit to the right to avoid the marker, he scrawls his name ontothe back of Derekâs chair. âNow you do.â
âWell, Stiles,â Derek says, craning his neck to read thename. âI believe thatâs called vandalism.â
âCall a cop,â Stiles says, shrugging. âPreferably from apayphone, as far away from this seat as possible.â
âMaybe I will,â Derek says, picking his paper up again in avain attempt to get back into the sports section.
âGood luck,â Stiles says, actually snatching the paper andtossing it over his shoulder. Derek is too surprised to be angry. âMy dadâs thesheriff.â
Derekâs about to point out that that really doesnât legalizehis behavior, when the man suddenly turns around and plops himself down on Derekâs lap.
Derekâs eyes shoot wide open, and the blonde woman laughs.
âAre you insane?â Derek manages to get out, trying to decideif this is actually happening.
âNope, just stubborn. I told you, Iâm having a terrible day, andIâm sitting in my seat one way or another.â
âYou are insane,â Derek decides. âThis is- Iâm callingthe police.â
âGo. Ahead.â
Stiles, apparently, really does think his dad can get himout of anything, or he has some serious nerve.
Derek really might call the cops, except A) his phoneis in his back pocket, and he doesnât want to get up, or to wriggle around with this guy on his lap,B) he cannot imagine a more awkward conversation to have on a train full ofpeople than, hello, yes, your bossâ fullgrown son is sitting on my lap and I donât like it, please come remove him, eventhough weâre on a moving train, and C) maybe, maybe Derek doesnât 100% dislike it. Which, okay, heâll admitsounds really creepy, but the guy is sort of cute in an asshole kind of way,and itâs definitely creepier that Stiles sat on him in the first place.
Stiles pulls out his own phone and actually starts textingsomebody, and for whatever reason, thatâswhat offends Derek.
âWhatâre you doing?â he demands.
âTexting.â Â
âOn my lap?â
âWhat do you want me to do? Hold a conversation with you?Tell you what I want for Christmas?â
Instead of being a normal person and saying, âI want you toget the hell off my lap,â Derekâs mouth decides, completely of its own accord,to say, âWell it would be polite.â
Stiles laughs loudly, his mouth forming an obnoxious O ashis body rocks on Derekâs lap, which- oh. Oh.Derek needs that to stop right this second, and he grabs Stiles' shoulders tostill him, then quickly drops his hands.
âI think weâre about ten miles past polite,â Stiles says,smirking wickedly. âTen miles, at least.But fine, jerk, whatâs your name?â
âJerk? Youâresitting on my lap,â Derek sayspointedly.
âSo, fine, Iâm also a jerk. But I asked your name.âÂ
âDerek,â Derek finds himself saying.
âNice to meet you, Derek,â Stiles says, sticking out a hand.
Derek doesnât shake it.
âAm I being Punkâd?â he asks seriously, making Stiles laughagain. âStop that.â
âWhat?â
âRocking,â Derek says, cheeks heating up alittle. âStop it.â
Stilesâ eyes go wide, as though heâd only just realized theimplications of him sitting in another manâs lap, and actually has the grace tolook embarrassed for a second.
âWhoops, sorry dude,â he says, edging closer to Derekâsknees. âThat was actually not me being an ass; that was an accident.â
âNo, still an ass,â Derek grumbles.
âYeah, whatever. You try getting shut down at a jobinterview for the fourth time this month, and having some random guy on thetrain steal your seat, and then being all happy about it.â
âYou try getting dragged to a family reunion, and having some random guy on the train steal your lap,â Dereksays, and Stiles smirks again, which is way cuter than it should be. âAnd maybethey turned you down because you have no concept of personal space. Did you trysitting on the interviewer when he said no? Maybe that wouldâve helped.â
Stiles looks like heâs trying really hard to scowl, butDerek can tell he wants to smile. Itâs a little funny, that heâs trying tobrighten this guyâs day. And by funny, of course, he means really freaking weird.Â
âYouâre kind of cute, when youâre mean,â Stiles says,winking.
That really shouldnât embarrass Derek, because the guy is alreadyâandhas he mentioned this yet?âsitting on top of him, but it does.
Before he has a chance to respond, maybe say that Stiles iskind of cute himself, the PA crackles to life and announces the next stop.
âThatâs me,â Stiles says, looking almost disappointed as thetrain slows. âHey,â he says, fishing the marker back out of his bagâs sidepocket. âCan I give you my number?â
âOh, that you need permission for?â
Stiles bites his lip, and Derek relents. âJoking. Go forit, I guess,â he says, letting Stiles grab his hand and scrawl a number acrosshis palm.
âCall me, maybe?â Stiles says, finally standing and headingtoward the door.
Derek nods, and Stiles grins.
âSee you around, Derek!â he calls, stepping outside. Rightbefore the doors close, he adds, âJust not in my seat!â
Derek, with bubblegum stuck to his ass, managed to pick up aninvasive, unemployed, adorable stranger on the train.
Oh, Lauraâs going to love this one.



















