“Just say it.” There were no tears in Gondar's eyes, but then he'd never show such weakness. He'd probably cry later, when he was alone, if at all.
“Get it over with and say it, damn it!” The Bounty Hunter bared his teeth at the Stealth Assassin. Anger, probably to mask the sadness. Riki wasn't sure.
“I...” It was strange, to see Gondar this composed while he felt on the brink of crumbling. He wanted to cry and scream and hit something, preferably his family. But this whole thing wasn't their fault. It was simply the way it was. “We can't do this anymore. My wife, she threatened me and I am the heir to the throne, I can't simply ignore her and keep going.” Riki wanted to reach out and touch Gondar, to feel his soft fur against his fingers. But he didn't dare.
The Stealth Assassin took a deep breath to steady his voice. “I'm sorry, but I have no other choice.” There was so much more to it, but he didn't say it. This decision hadn't been easy and it wasn't only about Riki and the throne. It was also about Gondar, and the way Riki's wife had threatened to get him executed. If Riki told Gondar that, the Hunter would probably shrug and say something like 'they'd never find me' or 'I'd endure everything for you'. But to tell the truth: Riki was afraid she'd do it and that he'd have to watch Gondar die.
He wanted the Bounty Hunter to be happy and this affair between them, it would always be that: an affair. They could never be truly together and no matter how good it was between them and how much they enjoyed their time together, they were both miserable afterwards. Because it was never enough and it would never be enough.
There was nothing to do about it, no other way than what Riki did now: he'd leave the person he loved most. There was no future for them, as sad as it was.
Gondar sighed. “I suspected you wanted to see me for this.” He shook his head, the anger gone, but there was no other emotion visible instead. His face was blank. He was a master in blocking all emotions off, he'd probably be fine. At least in the long run.
Not so much Riki, though. It hurt like fuck, to stand there and look at the Hunter, to know it would be the last time. “I don't want to be without you.” It was barely more than a whisper.
Gondar's features softened. “I know, I don't want to be without you, either. But you are right, we both have responsibilities we have ignored for too long.” He hesitated for a moment, then he stepped closer and hugged Riki. No kiss, which was probably a good choice. A soft hug, both lingering, both too aware that this was the last time they'd touch each other.
“I'm not mad at you. And I'll never forget you.”
Riki wanted to answer, to say something in return, but before he could, Gondar was gone. Gone invisible and probably skipped behind the nearest tree. Just empty air where he had been standing. “I love you.” The words were from his heart, from this place that longed to be with Gondar until there was nothing left except this love, nothing except the two of them. The need to be with him, to touch him and to talk with him. “I'll write you.” He didn’t get an answer.
On the way back home, Riki took his time. He cried, but only a little. Then he used the remaining way to get Gondar out of his head. For now. This wasn't about himself. It never was. He was a prince. His own happiness was never of importance. He was used to it, so it would be relatively easy to get used to having been denied happiness again. It simply was like always.
