#stealing knowledge

It's been forever since I've made a general update post like this.

Stroke Recovery update

In recent months, my ankle has been significantly strengthened. This has resulted in me being able to walk around my house without the aid of my support orthotic device (for foot drop).

It looks like next month I will finally get Botox injections...Medical Botox, that is. The worst lingering problem I have from the stroke is called spasticity. Basically, it's an unusually strong, involuntary muscle contraction; this has brought me to an impasse with my arm/hand therapy, seeing as I have to fight the contraction every step of the way, and the muscles are too weak to fight against it. My neurologist explained it to me like this: the brain damage from the stroke scrambled the message to my spinal cord, which normally sends the signals for motor function to my hand/limbs but since this signal has gone "haywire," it results in the "tight" spastic fingers and thus I cannot perform actions that require fine motor skills, like picking up small objects, typing, or playing video games, just to name a few. All the stuff I like to do, I kinda haven't been able to do since November 2022. "Kinda" because turn-based RPGs, my favorite genre, are ideal for playing one-handed. ASCII Japan knew this 30 years ago:

Only I play Final Fantasy, SMT, Clair Obscur, etc. using the accessibility feature on the PS4/5 that allows you to swap the function of the left and right control sticks, giving my right hand full control over both movement and the confirm and cancel buttons (and parrying in E33). So what does this have to do with botulinum toxin? The Botox will effectively kill the scrambled nerve signal causing the spasticity...but only for about 3 months before the nerves repair. But during this period the spasticy will be out of the picture, giving me a period where my muscles won't have to fight against themselves, hopefully allowing therapy to be especially effective.

Best Of Recent Posts

SMT4 HD!

Outdated Archaeology (This has continued to snowball with reblogs every couple weeks or so; I haven't had a post be this active in quite a long while)

Cthulhu, Penis Monster?

I'm Tired of Keeping Secrets

And now, the real reason I wanted to make this post. I've hinted at a secret project I've been working on that would release "soon"/"early in the year" In fact, the plan has been to release it a month from today, on March 19. It's something I've never done before but feel like I need to pivot towards as this 13-year-old blog crawls ever nearer to complete exhaustion of SMT-related topics. I'm long overdue for something new/different. So what will that be? It's a creative writing direction, something I've always wanted to do. And it's probably the worst time ever to start this, seeing as I can't even type with both hands. But I'm making do. I have so many stories I'd like to tell, but first up is the beginning of a series of short stories about every Goetia demon. That's right, 72 short stories about my favorite grouping of goofballs from "mythology." And I'm intending to write them sequentially, so that will give you a clue as to what's planned first. The problem has been that my prose has not manifested at the level I want it to be, so I've had to rewrite many sections and seek writing inspiration for how to tackle others. It's coming together one way or another, but this entire post is all to admit that if I don't think the quality is good enough by March 19, I'm going to work on it longer. I really like the first story and I think most of you will, too. Since it's the first one, it needs to be "right." I hope you understand. Even so, it may still be on schedule. I've never done something like this before, is the problem with setting a firmer date. I hate not knowing! Please look forward to it, and there will be much more than this when I'm ready to share it!

I don't have much time, but it's gotta be

I mean, the journey to proving she is original was unforgettable.

Currently, recovery is my job. It's a constant, seemingly never-ending thing. But not letting up has led to current results like being able to walk "normally"--heel-to-toe--on my left foot, without the aid of my brace/orthotic.

I still can't run or go outside the house without the brace, but those days are coming.

This week actually I have a meeting with a state agency that helps individuals with disabilities find employment. So I'm hoping for something good from that.

Otherwise, in my past life I've mostly been a teacher. In the US I've worked as a substitute and of course in Japan as ESL.

It's been a month already?

Stroke Recovery Update

Looking at last month's KD post, I was surprised to see I was already walking around my house largely without the aid of my leg brace. For some reason, it felt like a more recent development than that. However, I still need the brace to climb the stairs. The next step will be to not need the brace for that or when outside of the house, as distant of a goal as that may be. Much of this has to do with the impaired proprioception of my lower left extremity (basically, my brain can't always tell where my foot is or what it's doing, through it's MUCH better now than it was). This makes it difficult to walk in shoes without the brace, since the padding of the shoe means the sole of my own foot is not making actual contact with the ground. It's crazy how much I've learned about how the body works during this whole ordeal.

There's still a long and steep path ahead of me, but I try to remind myself that I push through these difficulties not for tomorrow, but for 3000 tomorrows from today.

It's perverse that nothing wants to kill you more than your own body. It's cliched but: take care of yours, it's the only one you're gonna get. Always think about where you might be in 3000 tomorrows, or even just 300. The best treatment is always prevention.

What I've Learned Since Last Time

I forget what led me to this the other day, it could have been a random gif, but I discovered the existence of Super Mario Logan (or SML).

This is probably a childhood memory for some of you out there, but, as a guy who grew up with Nintendo and Mario in their initial 80s/90s heyday, this kind of thing is completely alien to me, an absolute generational difference. But I think it's fascinating as a product of the Youtube of the 2000s, which must explain its millions of views.

Oh yeah, the Buffy the Vampire Slayer continuation was canned, which I think is a bummer. I was really looking forward to it and the leaked details/partial pilot synopsis don't seem as bad as feared and fit the tone of the original, which I rewatched in its entirety last year (it's still great overall).

Asks

My inbox is open again! I'm sorry it was closed for so long, but I really needed to hunker down on the story (see next section).

It's also come to my attention that some people are now using AI to write their asks; I have a zero tolerance policy for this. I would rather answer the sloppiest-written, most grammatically incorrect question produced by an actual person than ever waste my time dealing with this sludge. So if I detect AI use in an ask, you're blocked! End of story. It takes a lot of time and effort to make these posts, I expect the minimum effort in return from you.

TBF, I doubt it's many people doing this, plus I understand the people that do are still at least asking a fellow person and not relying solely on the AI, probably because the AI can't supply the very specific answers they seek.

Natural Delays

I still haven't gotten the Botox mentioned last month; I was almost certain it would have happened by now. Maybe by early April? I continue waiting....

And now the short story. It's not completely finished for today like I'd hoped but the first draft is complete! That's huge, but it still needs editing/proofreading and formatting for the page host. I'm thinking it will be released on a Saturday in the near future. But not this coming Saturday, as I'll be busy. Or the Saturday after, a friend is visiting. We all must continue waiting....

But I promise it's soon. So soon, in fact, I feel confident enough to share some more ideas about it and the overall project. This first story is titled "Grandpa" and is about/themed around Goetiamon #1 himself, Bael. And since the concept is to write Goetia stories in sequential numerical order, the first 10 or so demons of the list after Bael contain some big names, like Agares, Amon, Barbatos, Paimon, and Buer. I will attempt to make each one different, in genre or style. Not only that, I will be commissioning art for each story from the great artists in my orbit, like this:

^Chibi Bael Sketch by the one and only @duckpasta-kamonabe! (I have the finalized/color version, which I'm saving for when the story finally gets posted)

Have a Buffy as "thanks":

Did you know she has alopecia on her belly?

I need to reinvigorate myself a little, work on other things, et cetera. Plus I have more than enough to continue answering some if I have the time to do so.

Don't worry, I'm fine. It's just that some days are so busy with therapy, etc., that I have little time to do the things I want to do, like answering asks. Pre-stroke, my daily goal was to answer 3 asks; so, I'm disappointed nowadays when I can barely get 1.

Truth be told though, I actually got totally sucked into Clair Obscur last night, because I finally broke 1 million damage in a single hit (parry). And I know this is only the start....