You get him set up with cabinet locks, outlet covers, garbage-can covers, bolting furniture down so it can’t be turned over, the whole nine yards.

When it’s finished, you stand there with your hands on your hips, looking out at a job well done. You look over at him and ask, “How old are your niece and nephew, anyway?”

your hair on the pillows in his bed, clothes that ford would never wear, two different sets of shampoo/bodywash in the shower… picture frames that have been laid on their face, and when he picks them up he sees you and ford.

if you stayed in town after you and ford broke up during his paranoid era where he shut you out, then the first time stan sees you, he’s shocked. doesn’t know what to do or say, because he’s kind of pretending to be your ex-boyfriend. so he hides from you

you hear about your genius scientist ex-boyfriend now running a wacky tourist trap. and you’re not gonna touch that with a ten foot pole. so the two of you basically spend 30 years avoiding each other like the plague

it's hard as a brick. you can pick it up and bang it on the counter and it sounds like a hammer. how did he even make it that dense. it's not even brittle, there are NO crumbs coming off of it. H O W?

But how do you think either brother would take their crush / SO bring friends or faking flirty with the other brother? Lol I'm stoned. So feel free to ignore me.

- germ 🦠

I’m gonna go with crush rather than SO !

So let’s say you’re friends with the twins. Stan is crushing on you, and you jokingly flirt with Ford or call him cute.

I think Stan would start making snide remarks, or just sitting around with his arms crossed, and any time you try to talk to him, he’d just grunt in response rather than actually engaging the way he normally would. He’s normally so quick to come back at you with a wisecrack, so it’s immediately noticeable that something is off. You’d never be able to drag the truth out of him though, because he’d think it was dumb, unmanly stuff for him to get all pissy over something like that (king of invalidating his own feelings !)

Now, if Ford was crushing on you and you joke-flirted with Stan, he’d go through several stages.

Ohhh that is SUCH a fun tattoo idea and I LOVE it 🦠 anon. Suggestive content below the cut

Ever since Stan and Ford first met you that one summer as teenagers, they have almost always seen you wearing roller skates, even in school. (which by some miracle you were able to get away with) They were kind of your trademark, always cruising down the sidewalk in your quads which you had doodled all over with sharpie, swerving around mailboxes and other pedestrians with relative ease (most of the time)

And you had always been just about the same height as them, if not ever so slightly shorter. That is until today when you accidentally slipped and fell on the sidewalk while wearing your shorts, so you decide that maybe it’s best to walk the rest of the day and remove your shoes.

After Stanley slips a bandaid over the scrape on your knee, as he had done for his brother countless times before, you stand up and both boys realize that you’re like 2 1/2 inches shorter than normal.

Whichever Stan you prefer, seeing you actually having to tilt your head upwards to be able to look him in the eyes has him feeling some typa way.

have a nice day <3

love this, i’m a big fan of rollerblading! i know it’s different from the skates, but the height is still applicable. i’m already taller than my sister, but when i put my blades on while she doesn’t have her skates, i feel like an AMAZONIAN WOMAN, it’s awesome

friend, i would love to say that he’d be like “yeah sure whatever” but…

this man has a lot of archaic notions. he’s been with women a lot, but i think even then, it was typically a taboo topic. it was not discussed, just ignored by everyone involved.

so i think he’d be a little panicky. like, he’d *do it*, but he’d be freaking out a little bit. need you to tell him basically exactly what the box looks like and what type you want, and he still might come back with the wrong one, because someone walked by the menstrual product aisle while he was there, so he rushed. he’s shifty-eyed the whole time in the store.

then he’s telling everyone, “these are for my partner!!” like he’s afraid people are gonna think the period products are for him

I be thinking about both twins in their forties 😭 sad babies

Ford lost and running from Bill, jumping through dimensions, just starting to go gray. He can’t afford to stop or else he may be caught, but sometimes there are quiet moments in between jumps where he really has time to think about his situation. It’s terrifying, and he tries not to, but it’s unavoidable at times like that. He doesn’t expect to ever go home. What is “home” anymore? He was alone even before Bill started screwing his life up. Will he spend the rest of his life on the run? Oops, no more time to think. It’s time to move again.