Everyone's favorite hazelnut cocoa spread may have solved a cryptoozological mystery, and we've got the evidence! In this episode, we investigate the tastiest Bigfoot trap ever, uncover a Hollywood yeti smuggling ring, and hear the true tale of a trick-or-treating Sasquatch. Plus, the gang visits Cliff Barackman's North American Bigfoot Center, we recount our scariest Sasquatch encounter in the hills of West Virginia, and Greg has a snack attack.
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Why Bigfoot Hunters Use Mating Calls When Squatching:
I joke about this a lot, but there is a valid reason beyond wanting to get railed by a foot-long dong.
Hunting is a big part of my culture, specifically deer hunting. It’s how we control the population, maintain the environment, as well as obtain ethically sourced and free-ranged meat.
One of the ways to lure in a deer while hunting is to use a variety of calls. The type of calls used will be determined upon the type of deer hunted, the sex ratio, the age-class structure, weather, and the location in general. Types of calls include (but aren’t really limited to)
Rattle Bags: These are bags that you rub your hands against, which shifts it’s contents. The contents make a noise like clashing antlers, which will draw in bucks (male deer) looking to spar, as well as does (female deer) that might want to see what’s up.
Grunt Calls: A call that makes a low grunting noise. There are different kinds:
Social grunt
Trailing grunt that bucks typically make when chasing does in estrus,
Grunt that bucks make when they’ve found a doe to breed with
Bleat Calls: A call that makes a loud, bleating noise. There are different kinds:
Doe bleats that indicate that a doe is ready to breed
Fawn (baby deer) bleats makes the noise of a distressed fawn
When hunting predators, like coyotes, sometimes hunters will use calls of injured or dying animals, like rabbits, to lure them in.
I’ve often seen squatchers use the “mating call” of the bigfoot to try to lure one in. But I have some issues with this:
Which sex is making the call?
Do males and females have different mating calls?
Do only one of the sexes have a mating call?
It’s obvious that squatchers only know the one call, so it makes sense they’d only use it. However, I ask you:
Why don’t squatchers use prey calls?
Have any squatchers tried using prey calls?
What would be considered prey to bigfoot?
Why shouldn’t we assume that bigfoot isn’t omnivorous?
Do baby bigfoot make distress calls?
If so, what do they sound like?
So why do squatchers tend to use the “come fuck!” calls?
Well, it’s simple: squatchers learn from other squatchers. Mating calls are used in other types of hunting, so it makes sense that they’d be used when trying to lure out bigfoot.
New squatchers are also likely afraid to break the mold. Using prey calls could lure in things other than bigfoot. And we don’t have any distress calls to implement; can’t use what you don’t have.
I am, by no means, an expert on bigfoot hunting. But the reason that they use mating calls isn’t just because they’re horny for ape-beast schlong.
I’m not sure if you all know this or not, but Squatchy is a good buddy of ours and is basically our unofficial mascot. It’s rumoured that he’s been photographed wearing DRYFT waders while swinging for chrome in the rainforest. The pictures are usually blurry and out of focus, but recently we managed to sneak up on his ass and catch him in the act. And wouldn’t you know it he had just dredged up a real trophy. Big props to @caleb_goins_art for the sick new artwork/sign. #Squatching #PNW #Squatch #DRYFT #wadeandexplore #fishing #flyfishing #steelhead #madefortheriver #DRYFTculture https://www.instagram.com/p/Bu60VroDaVt/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=yxqtd84geqoo
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Now is the perfect time to go wild. Go squatchy. Hit the woods to your area. Away from people, have fun, find peace from all the stress, social distance and GO WILD.