Idea: After two years of being divorced, Tony Stark finally feels like he's ready to jump back into the dating game. He asks Pepper to arrange him a dating program so he can properly search for a potential life partner and step-parent to his young son Peter.
It all goes smooth and dandy until ex-husband Steve Rogers demands that he participates into choosing the suitors too.
"I have the right to know about what type of people you're going to let around Peter and if they're good enough to be a part of his life."
And, okay, Tony can understand that. He's kinda hurt that Steve doesn't trust his judgment enough to pick a partner on his own, but he understands. He may not be Tony's husband anymore, but he's still Peter's Papa so he'll allow it.
The only problem? Steve keeps rejecting everyone that comes in.
"It's like he does it on purpose!" Tony would hiss to Rhodey like an angry cat, but it sounded more like a whine than anything. "He keeps introducing himself like ' Hello, I'm Tony's ex-husband!' I can't even say hello to them because they'd be running out that door like Ryan Reynolds was waiting for them on the other side!"
"Tony, not everyone likes Ryan Reynolds."
" Literally everyone likes Ryan Reynolds, Rhodey, but I'm not having that conversation with you again!"
The program lasts for about a month, and Steve rejected someone yet again. It's like nothing can please him! Successful surgeons, Kings of ( potentially the most advanced) countries, ballet dancers (who may or may not be secret spies), scientists, nothing can reach Steve Rogers' impossible standards and Tony's ready to give up.
As far as he knows, the person who just left was the last one on the list of suitors he had to meet that day, so he's ready to leave when someone comes *dashing* through the door. The man is panting like he just ran two blocks, looks sweaty, and his dirty blonde hair is a mess. A hot mess.
"Is this the, uh, the date interview thingy?" He asks and before Tony can answer, Steve steps forward and offers the other man the same plastic smile he always had on his face when talking to Tony's parents. Or his suitors. Or anyone he hated, really.
"It sure is. You're kinda late, but no worries, " Steve extends his hand and Tony closes his eyes, already picturing Mr. Hot Mess running away like the floor caught on fire. But he reopenes them to take an eyeful of Mr. Hot Mess before he takes off. " I'm Steve, Tony's ex-husband. And you?"
Mr. Hot Mess freezes for about 4 seconds before answering and taking Steve's hand, maybe shaking it with a bit too much force than necessary and says " Hey, I'm Peter Quill. I'm his future boyfriend."
Oh, Tony's taking this one home for sure.
