LOVE AND HATE
Summary: Shawn and Y/N have hated each other for a long time now. But lucky for them, a little magic can make all the difference.
Warnings: Drunk Shawn (if that even counts)
A/N: So this is my first imagine, don’t judge me 😬. It’s not perfect, but give me feedback in the comments, thanks!
Sometimes the world is not as it appears. Sometimes people fall in love and tell each other. Sometimes people fall in love and instead of telling each other, they create an intense hate for the other to push their feelings away. But love and hate are so closely related that sometimes feelings get mixed up. Especially when there is a dash of magic involved.
“Pleeeaaaasssseeee let me hold your haaannnd,” Shawn slurred out to Y/N. At first she thought he had been messing with her as one of his cruel jokes, but after a half hour of his persistency, she granted him his wish of following her around the club. Now he wanted to hold her hand and Y/N was not going to let it happen.
Y/N was unsure if Shawn had gotten so drunk that he forgot that they hated each other, or if someone had slipped him a little Amour into his cup. Amour was an extremely rare flower that was said to make you fall in love with someone for a short period of time if inhaled or ingested. Y/N hoped it was the latter because then she would never let Shawn live it down.
You see, Shawn and Y/N hadn’t always been enemies. In fact, all the way up until sixth grade they were best friends. Neither Y/N nor Shawn knows who started it, but one day, their friendship shifted into a hateful thing and they had never gotten past it.
Some people would argue with them and say that the reason they grew distant and hateful toward the other was to push them away so they wouldn’t find out their true feelings about the other person.
But Shawn and Y/N were so engrossed in stopping the other person from finding out their feelings for them, that they couldn’t see that they both felt the same way.
“Please Y/N. I just want to hold your hand so bad. Please.” He begged again. Y/N ignored him and walked away. She heard a whimper behind her, but refused to turn around.
“Y/N you realize that when someone is under the influence of Amour and you’re the person they’re in love with and you leave them alone or ignore them they are in physical pain. It’s like the worst heartbreak you’ve ever felt but ten times worse. And you also suffer low self esteem as one of the side effects if the person you fell in love with ain’t giving you attention?” Laney ranted on.
She had been very intrigued in the Amour plant for as long as Y/N could remember. She knew so much about it, and all she was doing was spewing facts at Y/N to try and make her help Shawn.
Y/N had to admit that she felt a little guilty about making him go thorough that. She cared for him deep down but she couldn’t show it or else he would never talk to her again. She would rather have rude and spiteful Shawn than no Shawn. So Y/N turned back around, sighed, and reached her hand out to Shawn’s , who’s face beamed with the biggest smile she’d seen him give her since right before they started hating each other.
“Aww thank you so much Y/N You’re so beautiful.” Shawn whispered into Y/N’s ear causing shivers to go down her spine. He hadn’t called her beautiful in the longest of times. Her heart stuttered in her chest.
“Can I hug you, please?” Shawn gave her puppy dog eyes and Y/N nodded as he pulled her into a bone crushing hug.
“You’re going to have to bring him home with you tonight, you realize that?” Laney said.
Shawn released Y/N and kissed her forehead. “Ooh, when we get back to your place, can we cuddle?”
Y/N chuckled. “You know, on a normal day Shawn, you hate me.” Shawn’s eyes widened at what Y/N had said.
“How could I ever hate an angel like you? Are you sure that’s not a different Shawn you’re thinking of?”
“I’m positive.”
“Well then I’m so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you. I promise I’ll never hurt you again. Forgive me?” Y/N chuckled as Shawn pouted.
“You realize that when the Amour loses its effects you’ll break that promise?” Y/N’s voice dropped with sadness. Sometimes she just wanted her best friend back.
“Why?! I don’t understand!” Shawn whined. “I’m in love with you so how could I hate you?”
Now Shawn was genuinely confused. Yes he was under the effects of the Amour, but he had always harbored feelings for Y/N. And he had regretted ever being mean to her or making her feel worthless. His intentions were to make her distance herself but it didn’t work too well since they had the same friends.
He shook his head to clear his thoughts. He hoped to remember the promise that he made her once the effects wore off. He wasn’t positive who had slipped him the Amour, but he was pretty sure it has been Laney. She had wanted a test subject for years and she must have just got her hands on some Amour and what better way to test then on her best friend’s enemy.
Y/N dragged Shawn out to her car and helped him into the passenger’s seat. He whimpered in pain when she let go of his hand and closed the door. He had to be touching Y/N or it felt like he was being pricked in the heart by a bunch of tiny needles.
“Here you go,” Y/N said offering her hand up to him once she had started the car.
“Thanks,” Shawn said kissing it and putting it back on the middle console with his hand clasped in hers.
“Actually, instead of going to my house, let’s just head to yours. You have a comfier couch anyways.” Y/N said.
Though their hate had stopped them from being friends years ago, Shawn’s friends requested that he invite her to every group hangout that he hosted at his house. Shawn would act out out about it, but secretly would love the fact that Y/N would be at his house.
***
“Hurry up and get in my house. It’s been soooo loooong since me and you have been alone together.” Shawn whined pulling Y/N into his house. “Do you want something to drink? Let’s watch a show and have snacks like we used to do when...before...” Y/N was surprised that even in his state, he could remember what had happened between them or at least sort of.
“Umm, I don’t know if a movie is the best thing to watch,” In truth, Y/N would’ve loved to have watched a movie with Shawn because she missed the old times, but she was worried about what Shawn would try during the movie. Plus, it was already 10:45 and she wasn’t sure she could stay awake much longer.
Shawn pouted his lips at Y/N and she sighed. “I’m putting my foot down because it’s late and I’m tired and taking care of you is not something I’m very fond of doing!” She snapped at Shawn. She didn’t mean to, but she was exhausted and wanted to go to bed.
A tear fell down on Shawn’s cheek. “Umm I’m sorry. I... I don’t want to be an inconvenience, but I guess I must’ve really hurt you and I’m sorry. I thought there might’ve been a little part of you that still cared about me. Umm...goodnight Y/N.”
Y/N felt her heart ache for the boy. She remembered Laney saying that people under the influence of Amour were extremely sensitive to what the person that they “love” says and does.
Shawn trudged over to his room and closed the door. Y/N walked through his apartment—something she’d never done when she’d been over—and found pictures of when they were kids and still friends. She found one where Shawn had his arm wrapped around her shoulders and they were staring at each other in a way she could only define as love.
Y/N shook her head and sighed, walking over to Shawn’s piano. She touched a few of the keys and looked up at the sheet music resting on the piano. ‘Why’ was the name of the song.
Y/N jumped when she heard the clicking of Shawn’s door opening. “I...umm...I’m taking the couch tonight, you can sleep in my bed.” He was dressed in a white t-shirt and black sweatpants and his hair was tousled. Y/N’s heart swooned at the sight.
Y/N shook her head. “I can’t take your bed, this is your house and I’ve been so mean to you.”
“Well I’m not taking the bed so you better so my bed isn’t wasted tonight.” Shawn shot her puppy eyes.
“Fine, but just because you gave me puppy eyes.”
“I uh...” Shawn scratched the back of his neck. Y/N hadn’t seen this nervous side of Shawn in a while. Usually he was really cocky around her. “I left some clothes out for you to change into, but if you don’t, I get it.”
“Thank you, I’m sorry for yelling at you,” Y/N said hugging Shawn and kissing his cheek. “Goodnight.”
***
Shawn woke in the middle of the night in cold sweats. His head ached and he was disoriented. And why was he on the couch? And were those...no it couldn’t have been Y/N’s shoes at the door. But...he didn’t know anyone else that were specially made pink Doc Martins.
So did that mean that Y/N was in his house...right now? Not just for a group hang out? No, that couldn’t be. Shawn shook his head.
He thought back to the night before. He had gone to a club with his friends and Y/N was there. She looked so beautiful, as always. And then...Laney offered to buy him a drink. And...oh gosh!
His memories came flooding back to him and he cringed in embarrassment. How could he have let himself go so far as to cry in front of her? She seemed almost...happy in his memories that he was talking to her. Did she really care that much if he was in love with her? There was nothing more he could do to harm their friendship.
What if...what if this was his only chance to talk to her normally without it being awkward because she thought he was still under the influence of Amour. All he would have to do is act like he did yesterday. It would be easy, right?
Shawn cleared his thoughts and grabbed his phone which was resting on the coffee table. 5:00 AM. He should at least get up and go to the gym or something.
He heard the door to his bedroom opening and he quickly covered his head with blankets and pretended to be asleep. “Ahem,” he heard Y/N clear her throat. It was one of the cutest things ever and Shawn couldn’t help but blush.
He slowly stretched and yawned pretending like he was waking up. He cracked his eyes open and smiled at Y/N. She was dressed in one of his gym shorts and his gym shirt. She looked so adorable in his clothes and Shawn’s heart fluttered.
“Umm good morning. I hope you don’t mind that I’m wearing some of your gym clothes, but I kinda wanted to work out. Do you want to come with me?” Shawn nodded his head eagerly, perhaps too eagerly, even for someone under Amour.
***
“Here, let me pay for that,” Shawn said pulling out a 20 and placing it on the counter at the smoothie shop.
“You shouldn’t have paid for me. I’ve been awful to you. Well you probably don’t even remember. You probably won’t even remember this conversation in a couple of hours. I think the affects are only supposed to last 12 or so hours. Let’s see, you started acting up at around 10:00 so we have,” Y/N checked her watch,”3 hours, give or take.”
Shawn nodded his head trying to act oblivious. He was unsure what to do. Should he just tell her?
“Y/N I’m not under the influence of Amour. Or at least not anymore. I haven’t been since I woke up.”
Y/N looked up at him, her eyes widening. “Okay then, tell me something that only you would know if you weren’t influenced.”
Shawn scoffed and shook his head. “I’ve made you cry more times than I want to even think about. When we were in sixth grade and I vowed that I would never hurt you, I broke it. So many times. But I thought that by breaking it,” Shawn sighed taking Y/N’s hands into his own. “I was scared. I fell in love with you. I didn’t want to ruin anything. I didn’t understand why I felt nervous around you. I thought that maybe if I distance myself right then, I could fix our friendship later. But the only way you would leave me alone was if I really hurt you. So I did what I thought I had to do. And I’ve been regretting it since then. Every time I would say something mean, I would cry myself to sleep thinking I hurt your feelings. And I kept the act up because you would be mean right back to me and I thought you hated me. But I can’t keep doing that. I’m in love with you. Every song I’ve written about love has been about you. My cards are all out on the table. You can take them or...you know...leave them.” Shawn said voice quieting towards the end.
“I’m so glad to hear that Shawn! So incredibly glad! Was that song on the piano I think it was called ‘Why’, was that about me?” Shawn nodded his head.
Y/N pulled his ear down to her mouth. “Let’s not put each other through hell and let’s get over ourselves.” Shawn smiled and pulled Y/N into a sweet passionate kiss which she returned.
Sometimes love and hate are so similar that who you hate is the person that you love.
