₊‧°𐐪 "Social influence is subtle. Sometimes it sounds like my own voice." 𐑂°‧₊
I am the biggest people pleaser I know.
Going strong with that statement because it's true. ಥ_ಥ
I'm so self-aware but so helpless at the same time. Maybe it was because of my upbringing, where I was taught the importance of being obedient to avoid disappointments. Maybe it was because I have the urge to belong that I'm willing to lose my own voice.
Whatever it was, I can't help but break my words and bend my beliefs a little just so I can relate with others.
And it gets a little disheartening sometimes that even though I hold the wheel, I'm nothing but a slave to my desire of being accepted, seen, or heard.
Social Psychology has never failed to call out all issues I knowingly and unknowingly have with myself. It's like an on and off friend. It holds my hand tightly even though I want to let go every time I feel attacked by its honesty. lol
But it's not always a bad thing. It grounds me and also helps with my journey of softly letting go. It made me realize that whatever words my voice claims to be, it is still my own. Thus, I always had a companionship within me all along.
