#snirk

cheeto….

Enough cheeto talk, (even though he definitely looks like a glorified cheeto) he prefers doritos

“Hey, Archetto!” Blaze waved the cleric over to her table, where Hoshiguma and Schwarz were finalizing a wager. “You busy right now?”

The Liberi was there before you could say ‘partnership.’ “Certainly not too busy for business! What can I help with, Blaze?”

“The girls and I were curious: did you really sign up for that idol project to help support Landen Monastery?” The question was quite literally worth a thousand LMD - actually, more like twelve thousand, thanks to the raises the trio had gotten recently for all their hard work in the field and on-base.

“O-oh, that?” She hesitated for a moment but eventually sighed. “Yes and no.”

The Oni patted the empty chair. “Mind elaborating? We’re drinking Landed tonight in honor of your debut.”

“I don’t like many beers, but yours is great.” The other Sniper at the table sloshed her mug in solidarity.

“Really? On behalf of the monastery, thanks for the business!” That seemed to put Archetto in the mood to talk as she took a seat and, at Blaze’s insistence, poured herself a mug from the barrel the trio’d purchased. “First off, the first time I was offered a job like this, it was a small company, and they tried to trick me into it. Only reason I didn’t take the offer, honestly, was because the check wasn’t nearly enough to make the hours worthwhile…Ahh~ Tastes like home.”

Schwarz gave her a quizzical look. “How’d that nearly work?”

“Well, you see, when I started talking to them about opportunities, I was talking about the monastery buying some ad time - not much, but free publicity across the whole city would’ve been nice - and I demoed a potential jingle for them to use. That’s when they agreed to draw up some paperwork overnight for me to take a look at the next day, and they were really pushing me to sign without getting into the details of the wording, so I looked extra-close because that’s suspicious as Kazdel. If they’d been more upfront about it and given me a chance to haggle a bit on benefits and whatnot, I might’ve made my debut much earlier…But then I wouldn’t have made it here, or met the Doctor, and that would be a real shame.”

“I’m sure MSR and MountainDash appreciate you gettin’ here without being snatched up by some other agency, too.” The Guard practically guzzled the rest of her tankard to have room to freshly refill it to the top. “How’d they find you, by the way? Sing them your beer-and-bread jingle, too?”

The cleric shook her head. “That company ended up advertising for the monastery after all - someone recorded when I sang for them, and they used that to bring attention to both themselves and Landen. Bison told me his dad saw some of those commercials and started the whole ‘MountainDash Logistics Idol Concert’ idea, and when they watched the commercials together, Bison realized I was the one singing, so they reached out to me.”

“But it was your jingle that got their attention,” Hoshi emphasized, giving her opponent a sly grin.

“Basically?” With that, the Oni cheered and claimed her prize from the other Feline. “Wait, did you- was I the subject of a bet?”

The other three suddenly recognized what they’d done unintentionally. “Uh…sorry about that,” the Guard repli-

“Oh, I don’t mind, I just want my cut. Five percent should do it.” She held out a hand to the Defender, wiggling her fingers even.

“Heh…hahaha!” Hoshiguma gave her 1000 LMD in 200-count bills. “There, you’ve earned it. Funny thing is, that’s not the only bet we’ve got open about you.”

Ceylon’s bodyguard sighed. “Cat’s out of the bag. Archetto, are you interested in the Doctor?”

“...Eh?” Archetto.exe had stopped responding.

“Yeah, are you interested in him?” Blaze leaned forward. “You know he’s single, right?”

The Liberi swallowed the last of her mug’s precious nectar and went for another cup. “One moment.”

“I feel like that’s telling enough,” the other Sniper interjected.

“No, it’s fine; I don’t want money changing hands wrongly because I wasn’t clear.” Once she’d had enough liquid courage, the cleric nodded to herself. “But…yes.”

All three of them handed her 500 LMD. “None of us thought you’d admit it so easily,” the Guard explained, patting the victorious Liberi on the back.

“Really? Do you guys think I’m that bashful? Well, definitely not after a few pints of Landen!” The cleric lifted her drink in the air triumphantly before starting to chug.

“No,” Schwarz observed, “but he’s standing behind you.”

She finished the tankard before looking behind her. “Hey, Doctor! Wanna sit down for a pint?”

“Certainly.” The Doctor set his cup at their table before sitting down; Blaze poured him half a mug from the barrel, knowing he wouldn’t be having much.

“That was a good setup,” Archetto beamed at the girls before throwing her arm around the Doctor’s back. “Now as for you…”

When the Liberi didn’t say anything else, suddenly freezing up, he put his arm around her shoulders. “As for me? I’ll see you tomorrow morning for a shift as my assistant.”

“...Tomorrow?!”

“I stopped by tonight to tell you; I didn’t get to finish my schedule earlier today as I’d originally planned.” He sipped his beer with an entirely asynchronous amount of refinement. “I’m surprised the three of you were willing to pretend you made that bet.”

Hoshiguma pulled out her phone. “That bet was real, Doctor. We saw the schedule before we sat down at the table.”

“Ah, I see. Well played…However, I do believe I’m also entitled to a cut of the pot, then?” The Doctor’s eyes flashed; with his mask down, his smug grin was plainly visible.

“A cut of the pot?” The cleric repeated to herself in a soft whisper. “He really is perfect~”

Another 1500 LMD made its way to the Doctor, and from there, the night went rather smoothly. Before he left, escorting the half-asleep Archetto home, the Doctor slipped his mask back over his face. “Thank you for the entertaining evening, girls, but I’ve got a long morning ahead of me tomorrow. Enjoy the rest of your night.”

“You, too, Doctor,” Blaze replied with a mischievous smile.

“...Blaze,” he sighed, shaking his head, “I would never.”

The Oni shrugged. “But you knew what she meant anyway. Almost as if you thought about it.”

“Only the impression. Good night.”

“Well, he’s gonna be a lil’ sour with me tomorrow,” the Guard chuckled. “Mission accomplished?”

The other Feline clinked mugs with her and Hoshi. “Success.”

“And not a moment too soon. He said he enjoyed playing matchmaker, but his true colors came out on the retreat, didn’t they?” The bar was close to shutting down for the night, but the trio had a keg to finish. The Defender had the honor tonight, drawing up the last cup of Landen’s for the night.

“Oh, I don’t think he hid it that badly,” Blaze shrugged. “We just know ‘im a lil’ better than most.”

Schwarz gave her a curious look. “Do we?”

“Sure do! Well, at least Bunny and I do.” No small amount of pride in her voice as she said that.

“Speaking of Bunny,” Amiya whispered in her ear, “it’s getting late, isn’t it?”