#sm trash

Joy : Frankly I’d rather live with a lesbian than a cat ...

Wendy :

EXO-Miracles in December

Red Velvet-Wish Tree

SHINee-Winter Wonderland

Luna X  Shin YongJae-Its You

EXO-Sing for you 

Joy X Doyoung-  First Christmas

Taeyeon- This Christmas

Jessica-Wonderland

EXO-For life

TTS-Dear Santa

Wendy-Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas

Since money is a sensitive word about SM (they only give 30% to their artists), I will use $$$ instead.

*In SM headquarters slash BDSM basement slash striptease training company slash demon covered in angel glitters camp*

SM CEO: I knew not putting the S before EXO would lure parents to send their children to their “concert”*insert evil smirk* and then they would be addicted to them and throw their $$$ into our merchs, and we’ll make a ton of $$$ *evil laughter*

STAFF: What do we do about DeerTakeMe and YaoiHands?

SM CEO: What?! Are you not paid enough $$$ to bring them with the rest to EXO’rDIUM? It’s the debut of a new era damn it, fresh blood and fresh $$$.

STAFF: But they don’t want to come to Korea, sir. They said that and I quote “don’t want to defile young girls mind anymore”.

SM CEO: Didn’t one of them talked about bending a girl like a gymnast and blow a flute in his music, and he’s giving me lessons?! And where is SugarDaddy to take care of this giant striper?

STAFF: Are you talking about DirtyTalker or YaoiHands, sir?

SM CEO: Isn’t this obvious? Sometimes I’m paying you too much for this job…

STAFF: He said they’re divorced. But, well, if you want to talk about my earning sir…

SM CEO: Anyway, we need more abs for their upcoming EXORCIST, we already used SugarDaddy, DirtyTalker, FingerMePlease, HighNotePorn, SavageBaozi and DeeperDimple. NoodlesInABox and BalletSinner are not useful for that, when they’re asked to go to the gym, they eat chicken and drink bubbletea even more, I don’t even know how fans saw NIAB’s outline poor excuse of abs. Do not let me start about NotSooInnocent.

STAFF: Maybe, we could ask nicely TakeMeToWushu to return?

SM CEO: WTF?! You’re clearly overpaid. I don’t want this panda back into my company ever again, he fucking played with me. No one plays with me, no one except me *his phone buzzes and the pic of lee soo man appears*…or the ultimate boss.

STAFF: I think that we should take him back before anyone asks more questions about SM. They all think that we’re into bribing and slavery, which we are but never mind. People will soon realize that we’re not debuting male idols, but strippers. TakeMeToWushu sang a song about pussy on his Weibo, sir. And now that FingerMePlease showed is abs after his speech about them not being strippers to the fans, we’re kind of screwed.

SM CEO: You think that I don’t know?! Damn I hired you to find me solutions, not to tell me what I already know. Give a comeback to one of the girl groups of the My Little Rainbow Pony side of our company, they will wash away all suspicions. And for this NCT’s guys, give them a song. I don’t want people to start realizing why our three latest male groups had an S at the beginning of their names.

STAFF: EXO doesn’t have an S, sir.

SM CEO: Thanks to WHO?!