1. talk about the first time you watched your favorite movie

shoot honestly i dont even know if i have a favorite movie im the worst at watching movies cause i get super impatient and cant sit still for that long. the movie thats coming to mind is moonrise kingdom because im That Person and i dontr eally remember but i vaguely recall watching it when it came out in theaters with @girlyspice but this could also be ? completely wrong? fuck idk? i just have this really weird memory of being completely and totally intensely jealous of kara hayward because we had similar coloring and were close in age and i was like this could be me we are the same person!! which is really weird but whatever

9. talk about little things on your body that you like the most

iiiiidodoooont knoowwnw i used to have a ton of freckles when i was younger and i really loved them but i dont really have them anymore for whatever reason. i really like my hair color and my eye color and on really good hair days my hair will do the cute messy beachy wave thing but i feel like i definitely havent had a good hair day in months and right now its just frizzy and unkempt and gross. also im learning to like my lips a lot more than i used to and am appreciating the fullness of them which is niiiice also i have a faded stick and poke on my collarbone which i really love even tho you cant really tell what it is anymore

35. talk about things you wish you could stop doing

i wish i could stop being excessively critical of myself and extremely preoccupied with other peoples perceptions on me, like i wish i was more capable of focusing wholly on personal growth for my own well being. in my ideal world i would stop being as pessimistic and flaky and overbearing as i am right now. also i subconsciously fish for compliments a lot which i really hate but once again its just rooted in me being obsessed with what other people think of me so lol

40. talk about the end of something in your life

4. talk about the thing you regret most so far

hoooo boy. the obvious one is screwing up my relationship with food and my body because i really regard those as some of the most important things you need to cultivate positive relationships with and its really hard for me to practice that stuff now in a way thats free from guilt/shame/self destructive tendencies which definitely sucks. and then in middle school i was a bully in that i was a bystander in terms of some really awful damaging stuff that i definitely could have lessened or stopped, had i had the confidence or guts to speak up and be confrontational about it. i could have prevented a lot of prolonged grief for all parties and, while i did do some, i definitely could have done a lot more for the victims than i did. it was because i didnt want to experience more victimhood in terms of the girl who was the bully, as i had been pushed around by her for a very long time but like it boils down to the fact that my fear allowed a lot more destructive stuff to go down than if i had spoken up.. all at the expense of several insecure and impressionable preteen girls’ mental health. which is god awful and i regret my silence more than anyone will ever know

8. talk about the things you are most proud of

uhhm.. the one thing that im really proud of is my writing. my english teacher read a few of my poems earlier this year and he told me that it was some of the best student written work he’d ever seen and told me all about how he got his masters degree in poetry and that mine was exceptional. which was super flattering and exciting. and just in general, when i get told by different people that my writing has moved them to tears or that its even shifted their perception of certain people or situations.. its so flattering and interesting to be told that my preferred craft has been used as a tool for people to better themselves. also, im really proud of myself for applying to do a TEDx talk and getting accepted, and on a more personal level, im proud that so many people have told me ive positively affected their relationships with their bodies. i honestly dont really know why or how but a lot of friends and even just acquaintances have gone out of their ways to talk about how my attitude has helped them cultivate better relationships with their bodies/curves in particular!! makes me super happy. catch me wriitng a novel thanks to this ask prompt

32. talk about a place you remember from your childhood

5. talk about the best birthday you’ve had

i just realized i put my best birthday as my worst birthday a few posts ago lmfao oops. anyways honestly idrk but i wanna say my fourteenth just because at the time it was exactly how i would want to celebrate it, with my closest friends at the time (hey @ u) in a crowded living room listening to our friend’s band play a house show against a wall-wide window that overlooked the entire city of portland and then afterwards we all had the bombest sleepover of our entire lives like i dont remember a lot about it and i feel like i romanticize it alot when i tihink about it because being fourteen sucked but i remember it as being completely ideal and perfect and like a movie so like.. lol

26. talk about things you do when you’re sick

already answered

36. talk about your guilty pleasures

17. talk about someone you want to be friends with

aa ok theres this one girl i go to school with whos just intimidatingly cool in every sense of the word and has the most impeccable sense of style and looks good every single day and her morals and values are really in line with mine and we seem to have a lot of common interests and common ground and i have that weird relationship with her where we know a lot about each other but we arent close as a pair.. like we’re kinda occupying that middle ground between friend and acquaintance but i also know some really weirdly intimate details about her. basically shes super classy and refined and admirable and has very striking features and is a really talented artist, also she is definitely not a very happy person and it makes me :-/ and i wanna do more for her

24. talk about something someone told you that meant a lot

sarah @miscellanus told me our emotional connection was established more quickly and deeply than any other shes experienced and other related things that have made my heart melt, also anyone who ever compliments my writing in any way just worms their way into my heart by default. bonus points if they tell me they cried while reading it but i also feel bad because i dont want to make people cry so like what u gonna do

38. talk about songs that remind you of certain people

i have a lotta things that make me happy so even though i already answered one im gonna answer another

forehead kisses (kisses in general)

rediscovering music i love

earl grey anything

flowers