#siningsaysay

According to one of the books I’ve read by Ambeth Ocampo, we find meaning in history. My interpretation of his take on it is that the word kasaysayan can be split into two: salaysay which means narrative and saysay which is translated to the word meaning. We find meaning in history. We find our identities in history. We find who we are through our history.

Without knowing such facts, we might as well be categorized as a bunch of weird little brown people colonized a bunch of guys (because they could) and adopted the name Filipino (which was meant for Philippine-born Spaniards) because, well shit, we didn’t know what else to categorize ourselves as. If only we could belong to the world, eh? We could’ve been called citizens of the world. That sounds artsy-fartsy, right? But things don’t work that way.

In order to figure out who we are, we must look to our past. What makes us who we are? What makes us true Filipinos? Is it our sense of belonging to the nation? Is it our passion for our bayan?

I’m no history expert but, recently, I’ve found my way reading into different accounts of our patriots and our artists and people who considered themselves Filipino and wanted to be worth a damn to make our country worth two or more damns.

Partially, blame the take on the film Heneral Luna. I did not feel a sense of pride overcoming my soul nor did I feel the urge to go all Braveheart and pain myself blue and white (and red and have three stars and a sun somewhere along my skin). All I really wanted was to understand. Sure, I loved the cinematography and the scenery and the script and the acting...but this was a film. This was a work of art. What really happened?

In search of answers to my question, I read Ambeth Ocampo’s Bones of Contention. It wasn’t about Heneral Luna but who came before him: Andres Bonifacio; and what came before him: The Katipunan.

I chose Mr. Ocampo’s books because I enjoyed his style of writing: like an old friend discussing things for shits and giggles of clanking beer bottles and laughter from the kabilang la mesa. I am not ready to delve my fragile mind into the world of expert academics (I’m not saying Mr. Ocampo is not an expert, he just explains things in a way that a feeble minded goat like me could understand).

I enjoyed the book. I’m on my second of his. But I had to go further. It was art that brought me here, thus it would be through art that I will slide along.

Sining Saysay: Philippine History in Arts is a project by the University of the Philippines and National Artists. It was held in a gallery found on the 5th floor of the Gateway Tower located in Cubao, Quezon City. The aim of the project was to kindle minds and spark enthusiasm and curiosity regarding the events and, most importantly, the people who shaped the history of the Philippines...or better yet, the people who contributed to giving the Filipino an identity to be proud of. (It’s totally up to us, however, to continue being people who we’d be proud of...or simply, and unnecessarily, proud.)

I’m grateful that I get to experience such. Honestly, things like this which are for free don’t come along everyday. Might as well take advantage of it, and of course take it all in. Absorb it. Analyze it. Apply it. I’ll keep reading and researching. It’s become somewhat of a hobby, now. I’d look to the past and experience the present, learn from them both to prepare for the future.

Some of you were pretty much aware that yours truly is a huge history buff, both literally and figuratively. I have this imaginary bucket list only for the needs of my history-buff self. I am so happy to tell you guys that I crossed out one out of no definite number. *laughs* Last Monday, April 20, I went out just to wander. Supposedly, I’d take my Literature final exam that afternoon but my prof told me that the test paper has ran out so I was rescheduled on Wednesday. Actually, I went to Trinoma first, yep out of impulse! I went around to find a gift for my mom for her birthday (which was today, April 28th). Then, went straight to Gateway since it’s definitely the normal route for going back in E.Rod. I was about to approach the exit when I saw the poster about this exhibit. I've been really dreading to visit this since forever but I just don't have the time and mostly, I keep on forgetting so basically last Monday, I FINALLY DID. The exhibit’s on the 5th Level of Gateway Mall Cubao. I wasn't able to find it at first that I had to ask a security guard for directions. It was so breezy at the top especially that a garden will welcome you as you reach the last step of the stairs. I’ve never been inside a gallery as huge as this that’s why I was in a full “woah this is so freaking great” state.

So this is not the first painting you’d see the moment you enter the room. But according to my observation, this is the first painting you should look at. This could be seen at the left side of the door upon entering. This painting literally made me so happy like literally because it’s my first time to see a huge and real image of this. As you see, it’s the representation of Pre-historic Philippines and like all pre-historic history, this is the best symbolism. The whole image gives a lot of meaning but one thing is for sure, beginning. You know, the beginning of civilization, the beginning of writing (techniques), the beginning of literature, the beginning of art and history itself. This is the kind of image what our history books give us, the ones that were found in caves that were solid proofs of civilization at certain circa in that place. 

I didn’t take a picture of every painting in the gallery. I know I should have and it was so stupid of me to forget. I don't know, I lost it. I was really overwhelmed and was in complete bliss that I graced the alley; moved from one painting to another with my soul detached from my body and was sent back to the time of the paintings I was looking at.

Here are some of my snaps. I am completely aware that they all look shitty but hey, you can't expect a perfect photography from someone whose soul is out time travelling in the majestic yet slowly sinking past, right? 

I like this painting so much. You see, feminine power runs in it. The painting reminds me of the article from my Phil History class last semester, the “If Women Are The Best Men In The Philippines – Why Are They Invisible In History?” Sad but true, up until now, we can't deny the fact that the struggle for feminism is still there. 

This painting also got my attention because it speaks about culture and tradition. Also because there’s a representation of my beloved Bicol. Well, there’s Ina and the traslacion up there! Oh, I miss Naga City and my former school and my blockmates there and going home every weekend :(

2019 EDIT: I had to delete whatever I said under this picture. I’m such a Marcos apologist back then, I can’t believe I said all of those!!! How come I got so blinded with the fake history materials I acquired back then to be so thrilled about his era. I’m so ashamed of myself.

Of course, I left a comment where I sent my deepest commendation for the people behind this exhibit. It’s so brilliant. It’s like a time travel ... or it’s just me being a history-buff again? Nevertheless, it’s amazing!