#showvy rambles

every day of my life I think about how Dan and Phil ever got through WAD because goddamn. No wonder Phil started dyeing things green. No wonder PJ and Sophie started doing their babysitting duty. They must have both been going crazy without each other there, like they are so extremely Do Not Separate, how the fuck did they survive sleeping in different beds for That long. Not seeing each other face to face. How many times did Dan’s crew have a little sit-together covertly discussing if Dan was actually Okay. How many times was PJ on the verge of texting Dan dude I think you need to come home. How many times did Phil and Dan text each other I miss you in the most horrendously blatant affectionate metaphors possible. Actually going insane thinking about this thanks

Wrote something today for the first time since the concussion, so for the first time all year, just a small little 1k one-shot, and it feels like the worst thing I’ve ever written in my entire life, and editing is just not working out for me. Debating whether I’ll just give up and throw it up as is, and just call it finished and be proud I wrote anything at all, or leave it to rest for now and hope tomorrow’s eyes will be kinder.

Came out as trans to my brother and his fiancée today and it went really well, which is to say, my brother doesn’t care at ALL!! <3 Apparently his fiancée has been Suspecting this conversation would come for the past year and softly been preparing him for it. :") I never in my wildest dreams suspected my brother would react well, I was honestly prepared for this to go REALLY badly, so I owe her SO MUCH. I suspect had I had this conversation with him a year ago it would have been a disaster. As it is, today I got a noncommittal ‘yeah this doesn’t surprise me’ from him and his fiancée gently asking about which name to use from now on and promising me to try to not have too many deadname slip-ups. Kind of feels like a fever dream, I am SO emotional

I FEEL INSANE ABOUT THEM BEING SWEET. in unrelated news I’m gonna continue to write piss kink today

2026 is NOT my year. It is, however, the year of me kickstarting January with a concussion, it turns out

.... Been thinking about writing DnP piss kink lately

JUMPSCARE OF A NOTIF IF EVER I’VE SEEN ONE… IF THEY ARE BAITING US AGAIN WITH THAT TITLE I’M THROWING HANDS

Probably no new fic or comment replies from me for a While. My brain still feels like mashed potato 95% of the time, and I struggle thinking and wording things. A Lot. Even reading is rough most of the time, never mind writing myself. Being patient is driving me crazy but alas not much else I can do other than being patient right now. Concussions suck btw.