"Thank you for coming out in the rain on Valentines Day to bring me my pizza!" *hands over exact change*
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"Thank you for coming out in the rain on Valentines Day to bring me my pizza!" *hands over exact change*

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Fan submission:
"Don't tip me $2 and say merry Christmas. A $2 tip is my food for a day. Not your half-assed attempt at Christmas spirit."
When their total is $16.11 and they hand you a ten, a five, 4 quarters, a dime, and a penny. And you're literally just like, "Wow. Exact change. Thanks."
"Wow it's really coming down out there. It looks really bad. I'm sorry you have to drive in all of this." Doesn't tip.
I love it when their total is like $19.12 and they hand you a $20 bill and tell you to "just keep the change." Like wow. Thanks. Cunt.

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Really, dude? You make me wait like 10 minutes for you to find your wallet and only tipped me like $3?
Customer: “And here’s a dollar for you - I know I’m such a biiiig tipper.” (Obvious sarcasm) Me: (smiling and being nice) “Oh that’s great. Thank you so much!” Customer: “Whatever. No its not.” (Snatches the pizza with an annoyed look on face.)
Wow at least I was still trying to be nice to you. Good to know you’re a shitty tipper AND a shitty human being.
WHY WHY WHY would someone think that it is in any way okay to leave a zero dollar tip on a bill over $100? Why?