#sheply

“You can talk to me you know, there isn’t much I can do to help but I can at least listen.” She offered, approaching where Aiden sat on the bed with his head hung. 

“I appreciate that Ash...I really do.” he extended his hand to her and she happily accepted it, giving it a gentle squeeze as she sat down next to him. Aiden rested his head on her shoulder and she ran her free hand through his long black hair. 

“And before you ask Lily didn’t ask me to come.” 

Aiden chuckled “Oh and you’re a mind reader too.” he joked. 

Ashley laughed with him “I’m upset she beat me to it but I’m not surprised.” 

Aiden fell back on the bed “I feel bad, she came in to talk and I just brushed her off, I know she doesn’t care but…” 

Ashley laid next to him, staring at the stars through the skylight in his cabin “She’s just worried about you, we all are.” 

Aiden sighed “I know…but it’s not my home that was destroyed and instead of having a pity party I should be-” 

“You’re allowed to be upset you know, especially since you’re the one taking the fall for all this.” she interrupted. 

“But it doesn’t feel that way!” He said, standing up, it came as a shock, for someone as naturally calm like Aiden to suddenly raise his voice. 

“What do you mean?” She asked, sitting up.

“I mean….I mean... ugh!” his biotics flared causing the contents of the coffee table to fall and shatter onto the ground but he wasn’t phased by it and neither was she. Her main concern right now was Aiden, not a pair of cheap wine glasses he never even used. 

“I’m the great Commander Shepard!” he said in a mocking tone “i’m not allowed to have bad days, or make mistakes or screw up, everything I do has to be so goddamn perfect!” he exclaimed, starting into a rant as he paced around the room. “But i’m not perfect, no matter how much I pretend to be i’m fucking not….I wish I was, everything would be so much easier if I was the super solider they all thought I was.” 

Ashley nodded “I know…” she said softly.

“All it takes is one little thing to go wrong and that’s it!” he threw his arms up into the air “all this respect and trust they claim to have evaporates into absolutely nothing.” he laughed but there was no joy that Ashley could hear in it “maybe I should just let the reapers win, just give up completely!”

“You won’t.” she told him matter of factly. 

“I know!” He snapped “I know...it just sounds really damn good sometimes, to just give up.” 

Ashley stood up and placed her hands on his shoulders from behind, kissing him on the cheek, thankful for the bit of extra height her boots granted her “That’s what’s so amazing about you though Aiden, do you know how many people would’ve thrown in the towel after today?”

“Too many.” 

“Exactly, I understand self doubt, believe me Aiden but no one here is expecting you to be perfect, it’s all the politicians and leaders that are putting all this pressure on you and you can’t worry about them.”

“But-”

Ashley shook her head “If they have a problem with the way you’re doing something then they should just do the job themselves but they aren’t going to so what they think of you shouldn’t matter.” 

Aiden’s shoulders relaxed “yeah…” he placed his hand over hers “thanks Ash.” 

She smiled “Of course...I love you skipper.” 

Aiden’s eyes widened, it’s not that he didn’t feel the same he just wasn’t good at expressing it, he got easily flustered and honestly it was both embarrassing and sad for everyone involved “I...I love you too.” but much to his surprise it came so easy, as if he’s been waiting to say those words and...maybe he has. It’s not that he didn’t care about Liara he did at the time but Ashley was a different story. The more time they spent together the more he regretted not picking her from the start. It took him dying and the world ending for him to finally face his feelings head on and by some miracle she felt the same. 

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to but...could maybe stay, just a little while longer?” He asked shyly. 

“Empty? Shit.” she let her head thunk back to the ground, eyes closed. He let out a small chuckle, and then took in a sharp breath.

“Well,” he sighed, “How’s your head feeling right now?”

“Like it’s being stomped on my four Krogan.” she groaned again, bringing a hand up to cover her face.

“Have you taken anything?”

“No.”

“Will you let me take you to Chakwas so she can give you something?” he knelt down on the floor beside her, a bit more concerned. Sure, she drank, but that didn’t mean that she could necessarily take a whole bottle of hard liquor well.

“As long as it won’t be too bright in there.” she conceded quickly, pushing herself up slowly into a sitting position, letting John help her up. Though, they both realized she wasn’t going to be walking any time soon, and so he carefully picked her up, letting her rest her head on his shoulder as her arms and legs wrapped around him.

It was a quick walk to the medbay, luckily EDI had forwarded a message to Chakwas so the lights had been dimmed. John set her down on one of the beds, and chuckled a bit when she mumbled something about wanting to take a nap. He stepped aside to let Chakwas see what she could do for Ashley, giving her a few injections to help her recover, as well as giving her some high-dose aspirin to give her a more immediate effect.

“I’d appreciate it if someone could keep an eye on her, especially if she’s going to be laying down.” Chakwas said quietly to John.

“I can keep an eye on her, I need to get on those reports, anyway.”

“Ah, can’t keep the paperwork waiting.” the doctor smiled, heading back to her desk to file her own report. John turned back to Ashley, gently brushing some of the hair from her face. It looked like she hadn’t showered for a few days, but he wasn’t about to make her shower.

“Come on.” he said as he picked her up again, same as before.

“Where are we going?”

“You need some proper rest.” was all he said, heading tot he elevator, glad that it was already waiting. He suspected EDI had been holding it for him. Regardless, it only took a minute or so to get back up into the cabin, keeping all the lights but the ones in the fish tank off as he made his way over to his bed.

“John, you don’t have to do this.” she said, gripping his shoulder as she looked up at him once she was sitting on the bed. He smiled.

“I know, but I want to. And it’s for the best, anyway. I need to get some of my reports done, and if I have to keep an eye on you in here I’ll get them done.” He leaned forward to press his lips to her forehead. “Just lay down and try to get some sleep. And let me know if you want anything.”

“I’m not laying in this bed without you here.” she said the second he stood up to go towards his desk.

“Alright, let me just grab a couple data pads and I’ll be right back.”

She remembered falling asleep beside John after taking off her boots, the gentle tapping of the data pad lulling her to sleep. When she woke up, she was glad she only had a minor headache bothering her, and when she moved, she felt a blanket tangled around her legs.

Her eyes opened as she lifted her head, immediately looking up after realizing her head had been on his lap.

“Hey sleepy.” he smiled, looking down at her from his data pad, taking off his reading glasses and setting them aside. “How are you feeling?”

“Much better.” she hummed, putting her head back down with a happy sigh. “When did you get glasses?”

“Not that long ago. Apparently even cybernetic enhancements aren’t good enough to combat aging eyes.” He said as she felt his hand rest on her shoulder. They were both quiet for a moment, and then Ashley covered her mouth as she yawned, pushing herself to sit up beside him, noting that he’d kept his arm around her shoulders. She grinned and leaned against him.

“They’re still good enough to keep an eye on me, it seems.”

“Not like that’s ever been hard, have you seen yourself on the battlefield?” he grinned, sliding his hand down her back a bit.

“No, I haven’t seen myself on the battlefield.” she laughed, “I don’t think I’d want to either, I’d probably look as gross as I feel right now.”

“You always look good.” he said quietly, kissing her forehead. “But, if you want, you can take a shower up here. It’s a lot more spacious.”

“I just might do that.” she said, wiggling out of his grip with a smile, grabbing her boots.

“While you’re at it, why don’t you just grab your bag and bring it up here?” he called out just as she took the first step on the small set of stairs. She paused and turned back towards him with one of the biggest grins she’d ever given someone.

“Are you asking me to move in with you, Skipper?” She watched as he glanced up at the ceiling for a moment, thinking and then nodding with a smile as he looked back at her.

“Yeah, I think I am.” he said in rather sarcastic tone. She gave a short laugh.