Taryn: Uncle Bular you can’t hold us forever, especially Gunless he is literally trying to chew your arm

Bular: He’ll tire himself out soon it’s almost his nap time

Later

Taryn: Uhh uncle Bular Lizzy got out of your hold

Bular: How?

Taryn: You literally call us chaos jr how do you think

Bular: Lizzy get back here!

Lizzy: Why uncle Draal is cool

Bular: *Bular.exe.has stopped working*

Bonus

Full Metal Hipster – #87 – Shadow Woods Metal Fest Recap with HEAVY TEMPLE

Greetings and salutations, everyone! On this week’s episode of Full Metal Hipster I have a recap of the third annual Shadow Woods Metal Fest in White Hall Maryland. I went last weekend and met up with some cool people and watched nearly 24 hours of kick-ass heavy metal and hard rock. You’ll hear music from some of the bands that performed as well as an interview with Philadelphia’s own Heavy…

Metal Bandcamp:

http://metalbandcamp.com/2017/08/shadow-woods-metal-fest-2017-preview.html

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SHADOW WOODS METAL FEST

SHADOW WOODS METAL FEST, the Mid-Atlantic’s only open-air camping heavy metal gathering, is pleased to announce the complete lineup for the 2017 festival, which runs from Thursday, September 14th through Sunday, September 17th at White Hall, Maryland’s Camp Hidden Valley. For the third year, the festival will host 39 of the undergrounds leading bands, representing all genres and subgenres of heavy metal.

Over three days, the four stages of SHADOW WOODS METAL FEST will come to life inside the woodsy landscape of Camp Hidden Valley.  “Every year has been special, but I am just particularly stoked about what we have curated”, says Mary Spiro, organizer of Shadow Woods Productions LLC.  “I am extremely honored to present the lineup this year because I think it reflects the best of the underground metal scene as well as some of the personal favorites of the festival organizers. Several of these bands, I have been trying to host at the fest since the first year and I am happy to finally have them play.”

Beginning on Thursday night, the Pavilion stage will light up and set the tone to the weekend with all-acoustic and intimate performances with Portland’s dark-folk soloist AERIAL RUIN and West Virginia’s Appalachian folk duo, NECHOCHWEN.  As the moon illuminates the sky on Friday,  San Francisco occultists CASTLE will conjure heavy doomed thrash at the Woodland Stage and Boston’s HUMAN BODIES will deliver raw, blackened punk on the Field Stage.  On Saturday, as darkness falls over the Woodland Stage, atmospheric blackened folk giants PANTOPICON will play an exclusive, 70-minute set under the backdrop of the stars. Georgia’s tortured blackened death quintet WITHERED, Brooklyn black metal titans WOE, Rhode Island sludgy-doom foursome CHURCHBURN, mysterious blackened grind band DEAD IN THE MANGER, and San Francisco extreme death quintet VASTUM (one of two east coast shows), will all deliver exclusive performances to SHADOW WOODS METAL FEST.

SHADOW WOODS METAL FEST 2017 merchandise features stunning new artwork by Dylan Garret Smith and Brian Sheehan/Legerdemain.  The beautifully hand-drawn design entitled “Laud In The Garden” by Dylan Garrett Smith, is featured as this year’s Shadow Woods Metal Fest official limited edition poster (only 50 will be printed). The alluring design will also be available on t-shirt and hooded sweatshirt. The official line-up t-shirt by Brian Sheehan/Legerdemain features a brand-new ravishing design commemorating the festival. Official merchandise is available for pre-order now (pre-order is available until September 3). PRE-ORDER: http://www.shadowwoodsmetalfest.com

Marketplace vendors will include record labels Season of Mist, Grimoire Records, and festival sponsor Tridroid Records. Artists and craft vendors FTG Illustrations, Evan Void, festival merchandise artist Dylan Garrett Smith, KPG Paintings, Jessi Hardesty, Horrid CRVX and Necronomicharm will all be on site selling prints, paintings, jewelry, woodcuts, and so much more.

Throughout the festival, delectable food and beverages will be provided by the ever popular coffee wizards Zeke’s Coffee, pit beef and other scrumptious dishes from Pond View Farms, and vegan/vegetarian steaks, sandwiches, salads and more from Self Love.

SHADOW WOODS METAL FEST is proud to be sponsored this year by Moxie Bookkeeping and Tridroid Records and to receive promotional support from Grime Studios, Leftover Pizza Productions, and Perfect World Productions.

SHADOW WOODS METAL FEST 2017

Complete Lineup (in alpha order):

Aerial Ruin – Portland, OR (Ritual folk)

All Hell – Asheville, NC (Crusty black metal)

Bearstorm – Richmond, VA (Blackened southern death-prog)

Black Table – NY/NJ (Progressive black metal)

Castle – San Francisco, CA  (Heavy doom metal)

Churchburn – Pawtucket, RI  (Blackened sludge) **

Cut the Architect’s Hand  – Richmond, VA (Death metal)

Dark Water Transit – Baltimore, MD (Instrumental heavy rock)

Dead in the Manger – coast to coast – (Blackened grind) **

Dee Calhoun – Frederick, MD (Acoustic; vocalist of Iron Man)

Earthling – Richmond, VA (Thrash metal)

Elagabalus – Baltimore, MD (Experimental metal 2-piece)

Erlkonig – Baltimore, MD  (Blackened death metal)

Fiakra – Freehold, NJ (LARPower metal)

Foehammer – Annandale, VA (Sludge)

Green Elder/Paul Ravenwood – Johnson City, TN – (Nature folk)

Heavy Temple  – Philadelphia, PA (Psychedelic-doomed rock)

Hexis  – Copenhagen, Denmark (Hardcore/black metal)

Human Bodies – Boston, MA  (Crusty blackened hardcore)

Immaculate Deception – Baltimore, MD (Death metal)

Infera Bruo – Boston, MA (Black metal)

Kyoty – Dover, NH – (Instrumental post metal)

Mome  – Portland, ME (Power psych rock)

Nechochwen “unplugged” – Wheeling, WV (Appalachian acoustic folk metal) **

Night Raids – Philadelphia, PA (Thrash/grind) Obsidian Tongue – Medford, MA (Black Metal) Panopticon –  KY/MN (Black folk metal) **

Percussor – PA/DE (Old school death metal)

Seasick Gladiator – Washington, DC (Experimental doom prog)

Sloth Herder – PA/VA/MD (Sludge grind)

Take to the Woods/Jo Cosgrove – Baltimore, MD (Dark folk)

The Owls Are Not What They Seem – York, PA (Ritual noise)

Toke – Cape Fear, NC (Stoner doom)

Vastum – San Francisco, CA  (Death metal) ** Voarm – Richmond, VA (Doomed Black metal)

Withered -Atlanta, GA (Black/death metal) **

Woe – Brooklyn, NY (Black metal) **

Worthless- NY/NJ (Black metal) **

ZUD – Portland, ME (Black and blues metal)

** EXCLUSIVE PERFORMANCES

SHADOW WOODS METAL FEST DETAILS

Location:

Camp Hidden Valley, White Hall, Maryland

Ticket Link: http://shadowwoodsmetalfest2017.bpt.me

Price:

Weekend Package:

$175 Full weekend package (Thursday evening-Sunday morning) including all musical events and camping

Single Day Tickets (advanced ticket pricing):

$50 Thursday Only

$80 Friday Only

$80 Saturday Only

Cabins: $20 bed (shared cabin)

Food & beverage vendors: Various food vendors will be on site with both vegan, vegetarian, and omnivore selections.

Merchandise Vendors: Multiple record labels, distros, and artisans will be located in the Hall. For more information on becoming a vendor, contact [email protected]

http://www.shadowwoodsmetalfest.com/

http://www.shadowwoodsmetalfest.com/

http://www.shadowwoodsmetalfest.com/

http://www.shadowwoodsmetalfest.com/

http://www.shadowwoodsmetalfest.com/

  Marketplace vendors will include record labels Season of Mist, Grimoire Records, and festival sponsor Tridroid Records. Artists and craft vendors FTG Illustrations, Evan Void, festival merchandise artist Dylan Garrett Smith, KPG Paintings, Jessi Hardesty, Horrid CRVX and Necronomicharm will all be on site selling prints, paintings, jewelry, woodcuts, and so much more.

Throughout the festival, delectable food and beverages will be provided by the ever popular coffee wizards Zeke’s Coffee, pit beef and other scrumptious dishes from Pond View Farms, and vegan/vegetarian steaks, sandwiches, salads and more from Self Love.

Weekend and day passes for SHADOW WOODS METAL FEST are available now HERE.