#shadovan

devoted, yearning & obsessive

📜 ࣪ . ࿐ ˚ . THE WORDS STRUCK HIM TOO DEEPLY and Lorroakan faltered. His breath hitched as he closed his eyes and let his forehead press against Tareque’s, fingers ghosting over the sharp line of his cheek. ❝You shouldn’t say such things,❞ he whispered, lips hovering just shy of the elf’s. ❝It is cruel, even if you don’t mean it to be...❞

How he hated the grip Tareque still had on him… How those painfully sweet words still slipped past his defenses, winding themselves around the rawest parts of his heart, coaxing forth feelings he had tried to smother.

❝I wish I could promise you eternity — that once I am free from this... this wretched mortal prison, I will be yours, just as fully as you have always been mine. But I cannot…❞ His voice wavered and the ache in it was unmistakable ; raw and unbridled, breaking through the composure he always fought so hard to keep. ❝I… I am well aware that you do not ask this of me. You never have, and that is precisely why this pains me beyond reason, Tareque... Your devotion is a gift I have not earned, and I fear I never will. I have failed you before, and I will fail you again.❞

Fingertips tenderly tucked a strand of black hair behind a pointed ear before he pulled away just enough to meet his gaze. He wondered if his eyes still looked the same beneath that carefully crafted glamour... or if they had already rotted away. Actually, he’d rather not know.

❝You have always been far too good… certainly too good for me.❞ The words were uncharactaristcally tender and sincere, and yet they tasted so bitter on his tongue. ❝You should have walked away long ago —— Hells, you should resent me for what I have done rather than continuing to search for something I am incapable of giving… at least, not in the way you deserve.❞ That would have spared them both. That would have been easer than facing the unrelenting DEVOTION that Lorroakan would never know how to repay.

Send ✍ for my muse to write a letter to your muse!

Tareque,

I know we haven’t spoken for a while, but I find myself in need of your expertise. Apparently, Biscuit got a bit too playful with one of the artifacts in my library and has unleashed a curse I simply cannot rid myself of (or, more accurately, I lack the time to deal with it).

Rolan made an attempt to resolve the issue, though the outcome was, shall we say, less than favorable. Nothing too grievous, but he was temporarily turned into a sheep.

Surely this is a matter you can handle without issue?

She had been all too absorbed in what she'd been doing and jumped at Tareque's small gesture of affection and voice in her ear. She thanked herself mentally for recognizing a threat hadn't crept upon her. But then- why would it do so in camp? Everyone was looking out for everyone else, and there were magical wards helping to protect the perimeter.

"Tar! Forgive me. I got lost in the verse... again."

(I’m so sorry for….. him. *facepalm*)

Draped over his arm was also the blanket she’d gifted him; clearly he had no intentions of departing anytime soon.

"Cookies? Just for me~?" She made ample room for Tareque to come in and settle down; she wasn't going to kick him out. Not at all. His company was always appreciated and encouraged.

She took the platter from him and placed one of the cookies into her mouth. It was soft, delicate, and the flavor was get perfect; not too intense but not too bland either.

"Is this a family recipe?" she asked him. "This is lovely. What an excellent little dessert."

ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤWITH A FOND EXPRESSION, Lorroakan tucked a loose strand of hair behind Tareque's ear as he sat on the bed beside him.

"I promise." He leaned in, planting a soft kiss on the Lich's forehead, his lips lingering for a few seconds as his hand gently caressed his cold, pallid cheek. He didn't know what they were or what he wanted them to be, but one thing he knew for certain : he cared for Tareque deeply — and he wished for him to be a part of his life once more, in whatever form that might take.

ㅤㅤ"Rest now," he said with a lingering smile as he made his way toward the door. "I told Je'Von I'd join him for a game of lanceboard, and I shouldn't keep him waiting any longer."

ㅤㅤㅤ"EXCUSE ME?!" Lorroakan's voice spiked with outrage, but he halted his furious tirade as he fixed Tareque with an icy stare.

".... Very well then! I have no obligation to defend my choices to you," he spat. "And you of all people have no right to sit in judgement! But if my actions trouble you so, then kindly—" He pointed toward the balcony with a sweeping gesture, "—remove yourself from my presence!"