#sh too

both of my irls are so triggering. one triggers my sh by litterally having her entire arm scratched up and showing me her fresh sh, the other is super skinny and standing next to her make me feel like a fatass. neither of their faults, genuinely, its just annoying to me when i feel good and then i get to school and my friend is wearing a cute outfit that would litterally only look good on her and the ither one has FRESH fucking cuts on her arm while wearing a tshirt. i deadass just purge all day and relapse when i get home. this is slowly becoming a common experience i just need school to be DONE bro. maybe when i loose all this fucking weight ill actually feel loveable again. it really sucks. but whatever ill keep being an anchor for everyone else while i sink to the bottom of everything. when everyone else is sad and fucked up it makes me feel like i cant be sad too, cause that will just make them sadder. i dont want this to be like "wow ok i just wont be sad around you anymore" like no. be sad and complain to me about everything and anything i honestly dont mind, but when im sad too dont expect me to vent to you; it just makes me feel like dead weight thatd just dragging others down when they themselves could be getting better. ffuuccckkk whatever im done