#severus lives

Fandom: Harry Potter Pairing: Severus Snape x OC Chapter Rating: 16+ (Mention of suicide) 4,175 words Chapter Masterlist

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Chapter 1: New Life

Answering a job ad in the Daily Prophet on a whim, Stella Rosenbaum lands her dream job, in her dream location. When Severus Snape greets her at the castle door, she's convinced she's also met her dream man.

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Thursday, 17th August 2000  

Professor Severus Snape strode through the empty halls of Hogwarts, having been summoned unexpectedly to the Headmistress's office.  With the start of the new school year still a few weeks away, the castle halls were devoid of the usual mirthful cacophany.  He'd returned to the castle from his home in Cokeworth a few days ago, preferring as usual to return a few weeks before the summer holiday ended. He relished taking advantage of a quiet castle to prepare his classroom and office for the coming term; no rowdy students disturbing the peace, no insipid small talk with colleagues to avoid. The other professors typically started straggling in a few days before start of lessons.  For now, Hogwarts was inhabited only by himself, Headmistress McGonagall, Hagrid, and Filch the squib caretaker.

(the first post of this was a draft I posted by mistake. Sorry, but imagine my shock when I found the same post (that was posted) in my draft.)

20: After the Battle of Hogwarts, the wizarding world was left in tatters. Among the fallen and the wounded, Severus Snape survived Nagini's attack with the help of an anti-venom. Weakened and weary, he managed to escape the chaos, disappearing into the shadows to hide away from the world that had brought him so much pain.

For years, Severus remained hidden, his whereabouts known to no other. During this time, he immersed himself in his true passion: potion-making. He set up a small potion laboratory in a remote corner of the magical world, hidden away from familiar eyes. There, he brewed beautifully crafted potions, delving into ancient texts and experimenting with new ingredients.

Severus, once the feared Potions Master of Hogwarts, now found solace and purpose in the quiet art of potion-making. He spent his days concocting remedies for various ailments and ailments, perfecting his skills in solitude. His potions became renowned for their efficacy, whispered about in hushed tones among those who knew where to find him.

The shop became a haven for potion enthusiasts and those seeking unconventional remedies. Severus, although reserved, found a renewed sense of purpose in sharing his knowledge. His carefully crafted potions lined the shelves, each vial hinting at his expertise.

21: while Severus had a lot of turning points in his life, I feel like both his parents dying and inheriting their small and broken house was definitely a personal one for him.

Because change is possible, with the right impetus. Eventually (look, they're both appalling bigots in the books, but as they're not Bellatrix level of bonkers, there's a possibility).

"Do you hate him?" Narcissa asked quietly, voice still strained from the smoke and dust of battle. She stared out the drawing room window but barely saw the garden. Summer blooms waved gently, their sweet scents wafted in on a cool, twilight breeze. 

"You need to be more specific, darling." Lucius answered from where he sprawled across a sofa, an arm thrown over his eyes. "There are so many to choose from."

"Severus." Her voice broke a bit, and she swallowed. "Do you hate him for…" she couldn't finish.

"How could I, Cissa, when I'd have done the same if it was you? He was a true Slytherin and I'd rather grieve my friend than hate him."

She only just made out the last sentence and clutched her shawl tight around her shoulders. "You would have?"

"What would you have done if it was Andromeda?"

"I'd have burned the world to the ground for her." She rather surprised herself with her own vehemence. She'd thought...and that Tonks Muggleborn...but, well, did it matter? In the end, did it matter one whit?

Silence stretched taut between them, as it did so often now. Before...before because who knew who or what listened and she couldn't vent her fury before others, but now it was all the things they'd never said hanging like ghosts between them.

She turned to look at her husband, still a powerful man, a powerful wizard. Still able to make his mark on their world, though now it was all down to the Potter boy. Man? Who knew, now, when their choices made soldiers of their children.

He'd made the best of them at the private hearing, though, painting their actions in the best light he could. Oh, no public trial for a Malfoy, they'd stood to answer for their actions in a closed room.

The last few years left a mark in glittering silver stranding into Lucius' pale golden hair and lines about his eyes, she noticed, looking her fill while he covered his face.

"What if you didn't have to grieve your friend?" She asked, so quiet in the still room she barely heard her own voice.

"Cissa?" Lucius sat up, staring at her intently. "What do you mean?"

She crossed the room to sink down next to him and took his hands between hers, the first time in weeks, since that desperate rush into battle to find her son. Since Lucius' decision to take the Mark (after he'd promised, vowed, to cleave to her above others) rent their quiet world into pieces, just as she'd always known it would. 

"Severus isn't...he was close to it, but...he's in the green room recovering. I went back, found him, and I...I taught him to play piano and dance and what shoes to wear and...and salad forks...I couldn't leave him in that shack." Her voice cracked, tears spilling over her cheeks. "You remember his first night in Slytherin?"

"He bit Avery major." Lucius' composure cracked, his lips twisting. "He's not…"

"He's weak and petulant and he told me to sod off this morning, but he's alive. I don't know how, but he's alive." She hadn't cried for Bella, she'd lost her sister decades before, but the tears came now, hard, for the child Severus had been.

"We should...should we alert anyone?" Lucius asked once she had hold of herself again, gripping her hands tight.

"No. No, he's had too many people making choices for him. We'll wait until he's well and he'll decide." Narcissa spoke as firmly as one could still dripping tears. 

"Do you think he'll see me?" Lucius hadn't allowed himself to look so vulnerabke in years.

"I think he'd like some company that isn't me." She tried to smile and wound up sniffling back more tears.

"We'll both freshen up a bit, darling." Lucius rose and held out an arm. "And perhaps we can have a bit of a visit."

She took his arm, let him sweep her out of the room and toward the heavily carved main staircase. 

"Did I ever tell you about Severus right after your first piano lesson?" He drew her up the stairs, his tale creating a soft and safe space between them.

Somehow, sharing Severus between them helped smooth over the rifts and jagged edges. Narcissa knew they'd have at least one screaming argument in the future, air out all their baggage, but for the moment she could let them plaster the rough spots.

Word count: 1,928

It’s so cold. Where am I?  

Darkness clouded your vision. The sound of your heartbeat in your ears boomed as you slowly regained consciousness.  

The solid ground beneath you was jagged with ice, it pocked at you through your layers of winter clothes and reminded you that you were outside. You groaned at the stabbing headache that throbbed behind your eyes. 

“Mmm.” You brought a hand to hold your forehead, your cool skin eased the pain. As you began to push yourself up your vision started coming back to you. The world around you was covered in white and snow was now falling more heavily. It was still daylight and the brightness of the sun glared in your face making it difficult to open your eyes completely. “Ow.” You rubbed at your head then realized warm blood was still dripping from your nose. 

You managed to stand and steady yourself before looking around. There were no signs of the dementor from earlier. The blood warmed the skin of your cheek and neck as it saturated your scarf. That’s a lot of blood, you thought to yourself and pinched your nose. The steps you took were slow as you attempted to maintain your balance. You made it to the castle vaguely aware of the few students that were gathered in the hall now staring at you. Severus was still sitting at his desk when you stumbled into his office. Your mind still spun with images of the horrifying creature. 

“What happened?” He stood and hurried to you placing his hands over your cheeks. When he noticed the blood he began grabbing at your clothes earnestly looking for any injuries. After looking you over he noticed that you stood still pinching your nose and your eyes were closed. “What. Happened?” he asked again with more of a stern tone. His brow furrowed as he held you by the shoulders and shook you slightly.  

“My head, ugh, hurts,” you moved your hand from your nose, the bleeding had stopped. You groaned when Severus pulled you closer and began using the corner of his robes to start whipping the blood off of your face. “There was a dementor.” You blurted out sounding more shocked as you began to process what had occurred.  

The rubbing at your cheek ceased. Your eyes fluttered open to a grave look on Severus’ face. The urge to comfort him overtook you but your muscles felt too weak to even hold yourself up. You peered into his eyes and watched as tried to hide the storm of anger that began to churn. The spell had drained you, made you feel so incredibly sleepy. You began to lean more into his touch, trying to support yourself in any way you could. His hands were warm and gentle, his calloused skin a contradiction to the softness he emitted for you. 

“Are you positive?” He spoke slowly and when you nodded he pursed his lips. The man before you took a deep breath, he looked you over once more with concerned eyes then guided you to sit on his couch. He lit a fire and you relaxed a bit in the heat. Hands began undoing your bloodied winter layers. Severus wondered for a moment about how you had been able to defend yourself. He thought about the healing spell you had performed and how much it took out of you. 

Then he spoke, “you conjured a Patronus.” It wasn’t a question, he knew you were clever. He knew you were too smart for your own good. You looked up at him bleary-eyed and nodded again. Severus huffed in response then rummaged through a closet to find a rag to clean the rest of the blood. He knelt before you taking your hands in his. His lips pecked at your wrist before cleaning them. He let them fall gently in your lap and then began scrubbing at your neck. Anger began building within him as he sifted through anyone who could be responsible. It wasn’t some random occurrence. This was no accident and he was going to impose his wrath on whoever was responsible. 

But right now all that mattered was you. He hid his anger as he soothed your tense muscles. The overwhelming feelings of vengefulness were nothing compared to the relief of knowing that you were safe.  

“Why was it here?” Your voice trembled as all the fear came rushing back to you from that moment. It wasn’t of the wretched creature itself but fear of all that you had to lose. With a hand clutching at your stomach you brought your other hand to grasp Severus’ wrist. You squeezed him hoping he’d comfort you more. 

“I will find out how this happened.” Severus gazed up at you, his dark eyes hiding the rage within him. His calm exterior attempting to quiet your fear but he felt his blood boiling as he seethed internally. After he finished cleaning your skin he sat next to you and pulled you into his lap. His strong arms encircled you in a protective embrace. You melted against him absorbing heat into your chilled bones and burying your face in his neck. 

“Are you okay?” He asked, his deep voice vibrating against your skin.  

“I think so,” you whispered, “I passed out but I think we’re okay.” You felt him look down and his hand that had been clutching at your leg moved up your thigh and gently rested on your belly. He inhaled deeply, trying to breathe all of you in to keep you safe. You snuggled deeper into his tight embrace and sighed. 

“How long were you unconscious?” Severus didn’t really want to know the answer to the question. Whatever the answer was he knew it would only fuel his anger. He kept his eyes focused on the small space between you and waited. 

“I- I don’t know, not long.” The sleepiness you felt earlier was now taking over and you fought to keep your eyes open. It wasn’t long before the drowsiness forced you asleep and Severus stayed silent as he watched over you. 

-

The door to the Headmistress’s office was already open when Severus strode in closing it behind him. He approached the desk Minerva sat at with such high velocity that she believed for a moment he’d slam right into it. When his hands landed firmly in front of her she looked at him with wide baffled eyes.  

“Are you aware that Miss Y/L/N was attacked by a dementor today? On. School. Grounds.” He spoke through clenched teeth attempting to hold back his fury. A fire tore through him and he felt his blood boiling in the heat. 

“What?” The bewildered look on the headmistress's face was almost enough to make Severus implode. “Is she alright? Where is-” 

“She-” he pulled back with fists clenched at his sides, “She is fine, but-”  Severus paused. His mind flooded with everything he wanted to say. All of the pent-up emotion threatened to escape but he contained himself in his tightened hands. Minerva had been his most trusted friend for years, he wanted to tell her the truth. That he was deeply in love with the new professor, he had let her heal his wounds and made him feel whole again. We wanted to tell her how pissed he was you were put in that situation and he wanted to rage over the fact that his unborn child had been put in harm’s way. But he didn’t and his whole body felt stretched thin as he contained himself. The shallow rise and fall of his chest were the only movements he could manage because he felt like a teacup teetering on an edge like any movement could shatter him. He knew Minerva was not responsible but he had no one else to go to. 

“Severus,” Minerva spoke his name tenderly as if she could read his mind, “I will investigate this and find out how a dementor ended up on school grounds.” 

“Thank you,” Severus was curt with his response.  

“You love her.” It wasn't a question, Minerva knew he had been developing feelings for you. She saw how his eyes lit up when you were near and noticed the sharpness in his voice softened when he spoke to you. 

“I-” the air left Severus’ lungs as he looked at Minerva wide-eyed. He furrowed his brow and relaxed his tensed hand. “Yes, I love her,” words left his mouth before he could stop them, “and I love the child, my child, that she carries. I will find out how this happened, I will protect her.” 

-

After painfully sitting through Minerva’s ecstatic ramblings and congratulations, Severus found his way back to his office where you slept curled up on his couch. He felt his heartache for you as he watched you sleep for a moment. The desire to protect what was his came from somewhere deep inside him, some primal instinct to bare his teeth like a wild animal backed into a corner. This was unfamiliar to him, normally he’d steel himself from feeling like this but right now he was embracing it. Letting himself feel what it means to love deeply and it scared him. 

When you opened your eyes again your upper body shot up with a gasp, you expected to be outside again as if stumbling into Severus office bloodied and bleary was a dream. You took in your surroundings and realized it was real. A relieved sigh left you. You stood from the couch hoping to find Severus at his desk but he wasn’t there. Then you heard the clinking of glass from his classroom and you followed the noise.   

“I spoke with Minerva,” Severus stated when he saw you enter his classroom, “she will help me find out why that thing was on these grounds.” He kept working on the task in front of him as he spoke.

“Good,” you responded quietly and approached the table he was standing over. His normally precise hands moved roughly with a tension that he normally didn’t have. The center of his brow scrunched together as he worked. “Sev,” you whispered and watched him stop. He paused for a moment before shaking his head slowly. 

“She knows,” he spoke curtly without looking up from the table, “I told her about us.” 

“Oh, that’s fine.” You noticed the tension that remained in his eyes when he finally looked up. “I don’t mind if she knows,” you tried to reassure him as you walked around the table to stand closer to him, “are you -”

“I can’t lose you,” he uttered before you could finish. The word made your chest tighten as your heart fluttered within. He jutted a hand out to grasp at your wrist, he squeezed it gently as if that was all he could bear to say as if that was enough emotional spillage for him to stress over. 

“You won’t.” The space between you and the tall man shortened as you put yourself between him and the table. He let you pull him closer into an embrace, your arms circling his neck. When you drew away slightly he pressed his forehead against yours. His hands greedily sliding down your sides and under the seam of your shirt to feel the soft skin of your hips and lower back. You felt the tension melt away from his skin. When he pressed his lips against yours you felt his whole body loosen as if every muscle let out a sigh of relief.  

Warnings: NSFW, Smut 

Word count: 2,512

You’re awoken by wandering hands roaming your body. The feeling of the hands squeezing at the sensitive skin between your thighs made you giggle and turn to the man lying next to you. 

“What are you doing?” You whispered and adjusted to the arms that were now wrapped around you. 

“Nothing,” he sighed and pulled you close. His lips connected with yours for a deep kiss, you opened for his tongue. A small whine escaped from your mouth when he pulled away. He cocked his head curiously. 

“Hmm,” Severus hummed. His lips curved mischievously, dark eyes glossing over with a sudden rush of lust. His hands began to feel up the length of your back making your skin tingle. He gripped the back of your neck and the beat of your heart accelerated. The look in his eyes sent a shock to the warmth between your legs. After another kiss, he made a quick movement and was now hovering above you with his hands on either side of your head. 

“Severus,” you sighed when moved his mouth to your neck. At first, he kissed the skin softly but soon started to scrape his teeth and lick at the reddened spots he left. You tilted your head to give him more room, your hands clutched at his biceps. 

“I couldn’t sleep,” he murmured against you then moved his assault to the other side of your neck, “I couldn’t stop thinking about you,” his breath was hot against your skin as he spoke. All night long he dwelled on the idea of you swollen with his child. At first, he felt mostly apprehension but then a possessiveness overtook him. He began to give in to the selfish feelings he felt over you. He began to realize just how much he wanted you, all of you. Wanted this, wanted the child growing within you because he never thought he’d have a family of his own. The pull he felt in his heart for you intensified as he watched over you. 

The soft moans that came from you encouraged him to continue. His hand moved to reach under your shirt and knead at your breast. Your breath caught in your chest at the sensation and when he pinched your hard nipple you arched up into his hand. 

“You’re mine.” His voice came out as a low growl. The sheer primal tone sent a bolt of arousal to your heat. You rocked your hips up against Severus’ growing erection and he groaned at the friction. 

“I’m yours, all yours.” Your desperate whines filled the room. Severus then slowly slid his hand down to your waist. He moved down so that he could plant kisses along your stomach and squeezed at you. He kissed above the hem of your panties. 

“Mine,” this came out as a whisper from the man. You laid still and watched him as he slowly moved lower, hovering close to your now wet opening. He kissed at your clothed folds and then quickly moved to suck and bite at your inner thighs. At one point he found a particularly sensitive spot and you flinched bringing your fingers to grasp at his hair. You gasped when he yanked off your panties and pulled you closer. 

“This gorgeous pussy is mine too,” he nibbled at you again then murmured, “look at you, all wet for me.” 

“Severus, please.” You groaned impatiently. Then without hesitation, he took your pulsing clit in his mouth and you gasped loudly. He began to roll your sensitive bundle between his lips and press his tongue against you. A broken moan left you and you raked your fingers through his hair pulling him closer to you. He hummed against you in appreciation of the touches from you. He lapped and sucked at your folds making you writhe beneath him. A large hand was placed over your stomach to keep you still and the other teased at the entrance of your quivering entrance. With a low groan, he watched his finger disappear inside of you. The feeling of your soaked walls fluttering against him forced curses from his lips. You bucked your hips up against him when he began pumping you opened your mouth in exclamation. 

“Oh,” you grinned at the sudden pressure inside you, “a-another, another one please.” You whimpered, begging for him to fill you more. He complied, pushing another into you and curving them against the bundle of nerves inside you. A shudder ripped through you. The explosion of color behind your eyes and in your head was pure ecstasy. The feeling of his warm mouth and tongue against you sucking at your juices brought you to the edge. The sinful sounds that filled the room made your skin tingle and your muscles contract around his large fingers making him hum with encouragement. 

“Yes, yes. Severus, please don’t stop.” Your small pants and whines quickened as you balanced at the edge. He shook his head to give you more friction. The pressure that built up in the base of your spine burst, sending you over the edge you had been teetering over so deliciously, “mmmm I - I’m coming oh fucking hell.” Your fingers pulled at his hair, nails scratching at his scalp. 

Severus continued pumping and curving his fingers inside of you helping you ride out your orgasm and with his other hand he reached down to his now throbbing erection. Pumping himself a few times he growled into your gushing pussy lapping eagerly. You jerked against his mouth as you became sensitive to the overstimulation and watched as he tore at his own clothes, still using his tongue on you. When he finally moved his mouth from you to take off his shirt he kept his eyes locked on yours. His fingers left you slowly and you whined at the loss. The fingers that were deep inside you were now lathering his cock in your juices. 

“You’re mine,” he whispered and climbed up to kiss at your collar bone, “and I will never,” he kissed your neck, “ever,” he kissed your cheek, “leave you.” He ended my pressing lips yours, letting you taste yourself on his mouth and tongue. You felt him press his hips against you and his cock sliding against your swollen clit. 

“Severus,” you spoke breathlessly between hungry kisses, “I love you.” The words left your lips before you could think about what you were saying. Was it you that spoke those words? They seemed to linger like the smell of rain, stuck to your skin like honey, and you made him ravenous for them. 

“I love you too.” He spoke close to you hoping that you’d absorb them into you like he felt he had with you. Swallow every bit of him and know that he was yours just as you were his. You kissed him greedily and when you reached between you he groaned looking down to watch you rub his head against your entrance. After a moment you let him push into you, stretching your already sensitive walls. You moaned and fluttered your eyelids closed as his hips adjusted. He filled you painfully but when he impatiently began to grind himself against you the pain melted away into pure bliss. 

“Ngh and I love this tight pussy.” He groaned into your neck and the words gave you a sudden rush of pleasure and you fluttered around him making him gasp. 

“M-move,” you commanded, “please.” Suddenly the grinding turned into slow hard thrusts. He pushed against you and forced himself deeper pounding against your cervix. You exclaimed at the intense fire that engulfed you and spread to all your nerves. The sound of his skin smacking against yours and the feeling of your wetness that now dripped down the bottom of your ass were the only things you could think about. Severus kept his face buried in your neck and brought a hand to your sweat coated forehead to move a lock of hair and comb it behind your ear. You held him close against you digging your nails into the skin of his lower back. 

“Oh, yes. More, g-give me more. P-please.” You slid your hands lower and squeezed at the flesh of his ass encouraging him. His mouth opened against the skin of your shoulder as he used his arms to lift your legs more so the angle forced his cock to ram against your g-spot. You practically squealed at the immediate explosion of ecstasy. His hand gripped at your hips leaving his mark on you. 

“Fuck,” Severus growled and thrust into you faster. He felt the pulsing of your walls around him. The soft heat of you against him was pure heaven. He relished in the feelings you gave him and wanted to love you like this forever. 

When his hands left your waist he pulled himself out of you and quickly turned your shocked body over onto your stomach and lifted your hips to bring your ass to him. You spread your knees to support yourself and waited eagerly giving him a show by wiggling your hips a little. His hand spread over your cheeks spreading them to view your soaked and quivering cunt. A low rumble in his chest erupted before he buried himself deep into you in one quick thrust. He planted his hands on your hips again and squeezed you mercilessly as he began to move in and out of you. 

You closed your eyes and pressed your face into the cool satin sheets. The feeling of his cock pounding against your sensitive walls from this angle was overwhelming. He pulled against you to meet his thrusts and when his rhythm faltered you knew he was close. A hand left your hip and moved to rub erratic circles over your clit. You moaned his name and clawed at the sheets beneath you as you approached the edge of another climax. He leaned close, melting his body into yours, and planted soft kisses against your shoulders and back. 

“Cum for me,” the warmth of his breathed words against your skin coiled a shiver down your spine, “cum for me, love.” Tears welled in your eyes as the overpowering orgasm ripped through you causing your muscles to clench and you tensed around the cock ramming into you. 

“Severus, oh my… s-shit I -” words stopped coming to you fell from the edge again, and trembled through an intense orgasm. You felt Severus’ pace falter again and he desperately ground his hips into you and continued attacking your clit. 

“That’s it, f-fuck.” He trembled and you felt him buckle as he spilled himself into you. He growled your name as he fell from his own edge. The feeling of his warm cum inside you made you sigh as you came down from the intoxicating high. The man above you laid his cheek against the skin of your back and then you felt his body slump over you. Your body relaxed under him and you grunted at the sudden weight on you. 

“You’re heavy.” You grumbled after a moment. With a groan, Severus shifted to lay with your back pressed against him not bothering to pull himself out of you. He held you close and kissed at the nape of your neck. One arm wrapped around under your breasts and the other holding possessively at your belly moving his thumb lazy back and forth.  You both began to slow your breathing and sleepily cuddled into each other. You didn’t speak and nor did you need him to. Your hands rested over his lovingly and you felt yourself drifting back to sleep in his arms.

-

The cold air slashed against the skin of your cheeks. You walked outside in the ankle-deep snow listening to the crunch of the icy layers under you. Severus had been busying himself with paperwork and stocking his supplies so you had to find something else to do. A walk outside was more appealing than working on your own paperwork. You watched as a small flurry of snow fell from the trees surrounding you. It was bright out and you squinted at the reflection of the sun off your white surroundings. When you opened them a dark figure floated a few feet before you. You jerked away suddenly and fell on your back as surprise rang through you. 

“What the fuck.” You gasped and watched the ghoulish thing approach you. Scrambling back you hurried to find your wand and pointed it outward at the black silhouette with its arms outstretched and spidery fingers grabbing at the cold air. The jagged opening at the head opened like a mouth and a raspy gasp made your heart skip a beat. You knew what you were looking at but as you trembled you hoped it wasn’t real. A dementor on the school grounds was absurd. You had never seen one in person but you knew all about them. 

“O-okay,” your voice cracked, “okay, uhm.” You raked your brain for all of the information you had read in order to figure out what you were supposed to do at this moment. A Patronus charm. But you had never conjured one before. You began to mumble to yourself as the figure drew closer and the dreadful sound got louder. What was it? What was that spell? 

“Expecto p-patronum.” Your voice cracked again with fear. Come on. “Expecto patronum.” A faint blue light emanated from your wand for a moment before fizzling out. “Expecto. Patronum.” You spoke more confidently trying to blow away the fear and the blue light erupted from your wand. It blinded you for a moment and then you watched as a (Your Patronus) burst forward pushing the dementor away from you. A moment of relief washed over you as the blue light pulsed for a moment. You watched the dementor seize and disappear into the trees. 

As the light faded so did your vision. A warm drop of blood fell from your nose and your surroundings began to spin then there was nothing. 

-

Muddied boots stomped down the marble hall. When the door opened Irma looked up to see her associate that had been assigned to the Hogwarts case. She raised a brow at the sudden intrusion and signaled for the man to speak. 

“It worked. She took the bait, she conjured a Patronus.”

“Hm. So she’s more powerful than we initially thought.” Irma looked back at her work.

“There’s something else.” the man paused. Irma waited and when she didn't hear him speak he eye flicked up again. 

“Spit it out.”

“She’s pregnant.” The man spoke matter-of-factly and held his hands behind his back. The white-haired woman sitting behind her desk cocked her head. She set down her paperwork and pursed her lips. 

“Well,” she laced her fingers together, “that is an. Interesting. Development.”

“It’s his.” 

“What?” Irma flinched at the shock of the new information. She had to consider the many implications that this pregnancy may have. She sifted through the many intruding thoughts and waved the man off.

Word count: 1,747

A knock on your door woke you. The Image of the dark figure sent a chill vibrating under your skin. You had forgotten about the intense dream, or was it real? You couldn't completely piece together exactly what happened but you still felt the frozen grip in your core. Your mouth and throat burned from dryness which made speaking difficult. A raspy sigh was the only sound that came from you.  The knock came again and you attempted to move and with difficulty, you managed to stand. A vague memory of the events that had transpired last night fogged your mind and you wondered how you even got tucked into your bed. You moved slowly towards the door but paused. Words tried to form from your lips again attempting to ask the person to identify themself but you spoke so quietly you knew they could not hear you. When you opened the door you were surprised to see no one standing there. Maybe it was a student being cheeky. Regardless, your body ached with exhaustion and you were not in the mood for interaction with other people.

When you returned to your bed the exhaustion that had hung heavy on your limbs gave way to a burdensome sadness. The way Severus had spoken to you reminded you of the way he spoke when you first met, cold and distant. You knew there was something wrong, that he was having doubts but you weren’t sure how to help. Or if he even wanted help. Maybe this was a foolish fantasy, maybe it was time to accept that he’d never truly let someone love him nor would let himself love anyone back. When you thought about the life growing inside you your lips began to tremble. Would your child really grow up without a father? You thought or maybe hoped, Severus would be there for you both. Perhaps it was just a dream and the reality of your situation sent a tear streaming down your cheek. 

You tucked yourself deeper into your cool sheets and wished away the pain you felt in your heart. The holiday break was coming to an end and you had a few days left of freedom. The thought of having to leave the safety of your bed made you cringe. A small thread of hope for you and Severus remained, however bleak the situation seemed, you knew he was a good man with a heart capable of love. 

-

The moment when the look of sadness spread across your face played over and over in Severus’ mind. Each time he felt himself brace against the onslaught of emotions that followed. The only thing that kept his feet walking towards his office was the idea that he’d saved you from a lifetime of disappointments. He knew he could never live up to what you expected of him and he felt that pushing you away saved you and himself from ever having to live what he believed would be a lie. 

Severus had spent the rest of his day pacing his office, unable to concentrate on any work for more than five minutes at a time. When he went to bed that night his eyes remained open. He stared into the darkness of his room, still unable to quiet his wandering thoughts. When morning finally began to seep in through the large windows he climbed out of bed. He blinked against the dryness of his eyes and walked quickly out of his room. At first, it felt as though his body had been moving against his will, he wasn’t really sure where he was going. Then he realized he was walking in the direction of your room. Without thinking he turned the final corner and approached the tall wooden door, each step accelerated the beat in his chest.

Why am I here? He questioned himself. The urge to knock overtook him. What he was hoping for he was not sure of but when he knocked and no answer came a wave of disappointment fell over him. After knocking a second time he forced himself to walk away before. He had gotten what he wanted and likely what he deserved. 

-

It had been a full day of laying in your bed, occasional tears fell but mostly you stared at the wall letting the heaviness on your heart spread. It felt like the ocean had laid out across you, pushing you down. Your bed seemed like the only safe place in the world. The blankets were pulled close around you forming a lump on your bed. I have to get up, an exasperated sigh left you feeling deflated. The dread of exposing your skin to the cold air made getting out of your bed much more difficult. But you had work to do for your classes and wallowing in sadness was only going to delay the inevitable. A countdown from ten began in your head, you promised that at one you’d be up. Ten, nine, eight. You groaned as you threw the blankets away from you, seven, six, five, four. A moment of hesitation, three, two, one. You hopped up quickly before you could talk yourself out of it. The weight of your skin and bones felt foreign as you stood straightening and stretching your aching body. 

“Why is it always so damn cold in here?” You hissed and rubbed at your bare arms. You quickly found your wand and lit a fire big enough to illuminate the entire space of your living quarters. The sun was already setting, a muted purple forced itself through the icy lake windows. You stood by the fire for a moment before washing up and dressing. It felt weird to be starting your day at this time but Holiday was ending soon and you had spent most of your time not working on lesson plans. 

You dragged yourself to your office and lit another fire. With a bundle of food and a large mug of tea taken from the kitchen, you sat at your desk with an annoyed huff. You mentally promised yourself that you would not think about Severus, you will just forget about all of it and get your work done. Your hand rubbed subconsciously at your stomach. The small smile that formed on your lips when you thought about your baby was all you needed to motivate yourself. “I’ll be okay,” you whisper softly down at your lap, “for you, I’ll be okay.”

The work seemed never-ending, but you were glad to finally get something to eat and the warmth from the fire helped you to forget how heavy and cold you felt. Time passed slowly but you found it surprisingly easy to concentrate. Your mind appreciated the distraction. When the sound of footsteps echoed lightly in the night you hardly noticed until they were right outside your office door. You looked up suspiciously and reached for your wand. Then with a quick puff of air, a piece of paper slipped under the door and fluttered into your lap. Before you could speak the footsteps hurried away. The silence that followed was uncanny. You gently unfolded the piece of paper and read the softly curved letters:

 I must speak with you where no one is listening. Go to the Hog’s Head Inn tomorrow at sunset, I’ll be waiting.   

King

You turned the piece of parchment over in your hands examining it. Your brow furrowed when the thought of meeting with Irma entered your mind. What could she want? Then with one swift motion, the paper flew from your grip and buried itself among the burning logs of the fire across your office. You considered what could happen if you followed what the letter said. What if it’s a trap? Or what if she really does just want to talk. The loneliness that had weighed heavy on you crept its way back under your skin, you had no one you trusted that you could ask for advice. Perhaps Minerva but you knew she would immediately inform Severus and you wanted to keep him at a distance. Your eyes blankly stared into the flames as you pondered what to do.  

After making it back to your room and sleeping through all of your questions, you finally made a decision. So many strange things had happened in the last day and for some reason, you had a bitter suspicion that Irma King knew why. You knew you had to be prepared for anything she might say or do, but the worst part was that you did not have Severus. He would’ve done anything to protect you and now you felt vulnerable without him. You secretly hoped that he’d show up at your door begging for you to take him back but you pushed against the crushing sadness because it was only going to distract you. You needed to focus on keeping yourself safe and protecting the life within you at all costs.

You had awoken around lunchtime. The school was still mostly empty as classes did not begin for another few days. Some students had begun to trickle in here and there but the long corridors and large classrooms were silent. During the school recess, you had made it a habit to directly go to the kitchen to find your meals. While the kitchen elves were severely unhappy about this, you knew that if you were polite and cleaned up after yourself they’d reluctantly allow it. 

You quickly ate and as you were leaving the room you bumped into Minerva. She grunted softly and straightened herself up before looking at who it was she collided with. 

“Oh, Y/N!” she exclaimed, “I’ve been meaning to find you. Have you seen Severus recently, he was supposed to-”

“Uhm, no. I have not seen him,” you cut her off, not wanting to dwell on any conversation about the man, “excuse me.” The sudden look of confusion and shock on the headmistress’s face sent blood straight to your cheeks. You hurried away pressing your cool hands to your face to ease the heat and you drew a deep breath. You were not ready to discuss with anyone about your relationship or lack of. The thought of it made your eyes begin to swell but you continued walking onward and whispered to yourself, “stay focused, stay focused.”  You had a plan, a way to ensure the meeting with Irma would not compromise your or your child’s safety.