#setbacks happen

I'm officially 1 week post-op and well on my way to recovery. I have had three amazing doctors and a wonderful array of nurses who have bent over backwards to make sure I have stayed comfortable, well informed, and taken care of. Honestly, theres about a bajillion reasons why I'm so thankful I had surgery and that it went so well, but..... this aint that kinda post.

This is a post from the perspective of a girl whos been busting her balls to lose weight and be healthy and in shape for years and has now hit an uncontrollable brick wall. These are my current thoughts and fears and I hope I dont come off as a whiny ass. I'm not feeling sorry for myself as much as just dealing with a new reality.

I desperately miss exercise. Ive got another 4 weeks before I can start again lightly. To be honest, Im scared to death Im going to lose that bug... the habitual drive that only comes with continued and productive exercise. To a girl who once thought running was cruel and unusual punishment, its terrifying to think I could inadvertently go back to that.

I'm confined to stretchy pants which in theory sounds amazing, but in actuality really blows. The swelling is crazy outta hand and makes putting on any pair of jeans I own an impossible feat (believe me, I've tried them all.) This is a kick in the junk to a girl whos already feeling a little down.

And Im sure you could guess as much, but Im really worried about a weight backslide. Ive been so programmed to revolve myself around eating healthy AND physical activity, its only fair to assume that some aspects will need to be changed to even remain at the same weight through this hiatus. I know Im gonna come off sounding like a complete baby here.... but I just dont freakin wanna. I finally find the perfect recipe for weight loss and now....blammo, monkey wrench. It's hard not to be a little irritated.