#senuiiryi

Happy birthday Set!

Set is the god that stepped forward as my first Beloved. The god that disguised himself as Anubis to meet me because I was so scared of him. The god that threw my life into upheaval and tore everything down so that I could rebuild it better. I have always had a special relationship with Set once I got over my initial fear of him. I love him so much, I feel so close to him.

Set's offerings are tacos (with extra hot sauce), chips and salsa, and frankincense incense.

Di Wep Ronpet Nofret!

New year rituals have been completed, now to indulge in offerings!

My gods requested pancakes and sausage, I also offered coffee and my Father's (and my) favorite orange incense.

I have really been neglecting my spiritual practice. The Epag days and upcoming Wep Ronpet have me feeling renewed, refreshed.

Happy birthday Nebthet!

I wanted to offer her cheesecake, but they didn't have any at the store. Instead I bought her an apple pie. I also offered coffee and incense. I spent the day cleaning the house and then doing my nails. Nebthet has always been super quiet to me, I haven't heard her say much, but she's a god I feel comfortable sitting in silence with.

Happy birthday Heru-wer!

Offerings of veggie "chicken" with gravy, sautéed broccoli, baked potato and orange incense.

The orange incense is my favorite, it smells so good. I have always associated him with oranges so I like to offer it to him.

Happy birthday Aset!

Today was not good. The accumulation of overtime from the past two weeks caught up to me and I am just mentally and physically exhausted. I wanted to go to the store and get some fruit and bread for her but didn't have the energy. I cried making dinner because all I wanted to do was just sit down/relax for the first time in 16 hours.

I still made a bowl of pasta for her with a side of broccoli. I also lit lotus incense. Not pictured is the coffee I offered her after I ate.

In the past I did not get along with Aset, but since starting Sau I've been able to make a connection with her. I wouldn't say we are close, but I can talk to her now and feel we can understand one another.

3 weeks ago I woke up with an awful pain in my left side, right under the bra line. I thought I pulled a muscle and waited for it to get better. After 3 days it still hurt when I breathed deeply so I went to an urgent care to find out why it still hurt. They did an xray and I had a rib fracture. I have had no trauma, no long term steroid use, absolutely no reason at all for my rib to crack like that.

I know that one of the top reason for unexplained fractures is tumors, so I was worried. I scheduled a visit with my primary care doc who scheduled a CT scan for me. She told me it's a high probability it could be cancer, since nothing else made sense. We did lab work which was normal, but a lot of cancers don't show up in routine lab work. She told me she'd rather me hear that now and have time to digest that rather than hearing it if something showed up on the scan. She said that way if it isn't cancer, you'll be relieved but if it is you'll be prepared. I am grateful for that because she's right, I would have freaked out.

I spent the next week contemplating my mortality as I waited for my CT scan. I was kinder to others, tried not to be so judgemental because it didn't seem to matter anymore. All the little things that pissed me off so much didn't bother me at all, they seemed insignificant in the face of looming death. In between bouts of anxiety filled crying fits, I tried to enjoy as much as I could. I savored and was grateful for the hugs from my husband, the cuddles from my pup, the talks with my mom and brother, sunrises, my food, my job, nature, everything. I made up my mind that no matter the results of my scan, I would continue to live this way.

I got my scan today and was worried but at peace, I was prepared no matter the result. Thank the gods they found no lesions or abnormalities in my chest. It's not cancer. My time isn't cut short yet. I was walking in a used bookstore when I got the notification of the report. I cried from relief. I'm still in tears of happiness.

This cancer scare has changed my life. I have vowed to the Netjeru to live my life fully. To be kind, to be present, to be grateful. You truly don't know when it's your time, so make the most of what time you have. I will enjoy every moment and see each day as a gift, no matter if I wake up happy or in tears of sadness.

Every breath is a blessing.