#sendmerequests

(They did us really dirty...So I tried to fix it a little. Oh and...In my world, Omar never cheated on Ander). 

ps- i’ll be taking one shot omander requests in my ask box. Xx

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Ander sits on the edge of his bed in the darkness. It’s the middle of the night, but slumber does not find him. The boy gently brushes his left hand against his newly shaved skull. The sensation feels weird against the tip of his trembling fingers. He keeps staring at the bandage in the crook of his arm, reminding him the severity of the situation he is dived deep into. He already misses his curls, even though he knows it’s a superficial way of seeing things. He’s not stupid, he knows it’s just hair, but it makes everything so much more real. As he waits for Omar who is still in the bathroom, probably trying to think of ways of running away from this relationship, Ander pushes himself further into his bed. He can’t ignore how rough the satin sheets feel against him sensitive skin. Squeezing his eyes shut, he brings his legs to his chest, hugging them with the remaining strength in his thin arms. He lets his head fall against his knees as he tries so chase away the thoughts of the well-deserved nightmare that is now consuming his life and sucking every remaining ounce of energy out of his body.

Meanwhile, Omar makes sure to throw away every single strand of brown hair resting against the bathroom tiles. The light hurts his eyes, probably because he’s been crying for the past five minutes. Never in a thousand years, Omar would have thought Ander would be diagnosed with Leukemia. He’s terrified and even though he knows how strong Ander is, he knows he’s scared too. He takes a few moments to get himself together, resting onto the edge of the bath. He rubs his face between his hands, trying to shake his fears away. He wants to be strong for the boy he loves. Once he feels like he won’t burst into tears, Omar convinces himself to get on his feet, walking back into the bedroom. His eyes then meet with Ander’s shaking frame. Shaking his head gently, trying to keep his tears to himself, Omar walks closer to the bed. He allows himself to sit right new to him, letting their thighs brush against each other. He presses a hand between Ander’s shoulder blades, feeling the other boy get stiff against his touch. He takes a deep breath, picking his next words very carefully. The last thing he wanted was to startle Ander.  

"Shh...You’re alright. It’s just you and me." Omar whispers as he gently rubs circles up and down his boyfriends back.

Ander takes a long stuttering breath before speaking. He knows very well that he can no longer play pretend.

"Nothing about this is alright Omar." Ander whimpers, slowly lifting his head only to stare into his lovers’ eyes.

Omar stares at him very calmly, noticing that ever since Ander has received his diagnosis, this is the first time he looks on the verge of breaking down. Wanting to make the moment as intimate as possible, Omar lets both his hands rest against of Ander’s knee’s, pulling his legs onto his lap.

"Honey, it’s just hair. Plus, the buzzcut gives you mad bad boy vibes. It turns me on." Omar snorts, trying to make the situation less tense.

Ander knows Omar is trying to lighten the mood, but he’s tired of keeping a smile on his face. He can’t find the courage to fake it anymore. Ander is fucking scared of dying. He blinks a few times before shaking his head, trying to leave Omar’s embrace. As Omar feels him getting further, he reinforces their connection, pulling him further down against his chest. Ander sighs because he knows this is a battle he won’t win. Therefore, he lets his body weight completely drop against Omar’s side. When Omar feels Ander’s body give up, he grows more worried, pressing a gentle kiss against the top of his skull.

"I’m not playing charades with you Ander. You need to tell me what’s wrong." Omar can hear himself almost begging.

"I’m not upset about my hair Omar…I’m in hostage and I’m keeping you on lockdown with me. It’s not fair. You should be having fun with your friends. You’ve had to sacrifice so much to be free and now that you are…I’m holding you back. I don’t want you being miserable because of me. You should have left when I told you the truth about Polo. You could find so much bett…"

‘’Shut up.’’ Omar shook his head, taking a grip of Ander’s freezing hands and giving them a firm squeeze. He lifts them near his mouth and blows on them gently in attempt to warm them up. ‘’I won’t allow you to finish that sentence. I love you. Just you. All of you. I don’t care about this shit. I don’t care about staying at home every night to cuddle on the couch. I don’t care about rubbing your back while you get sick or staying up at night when you don’t feel good.’’ Omar slowly let’s go of his boyfriends’ hand, only to cup his cheeks softly, forcing their spheres to meet. ‘’Look at me. This is not a prison to me, because there is no place I would rather be right now. I didn’t pick you for your pretty curls, party animal vibes or sexy abs. I picked you because you are caring, because you are an amazing listener and because you make me feel like a king. Nothing of that has changed because of cancer Ander.’’ Omar insists, eyes getting moist.

Ander bites onto his quivering bottom lip and gives him a gentle nod. He feels like his heart is about to burst out of his chest. How could he have gotten so lucky?

"It’s okay not to be okay. I won’t let go of you because this shit disease decided to attack the most amazing person I know."

Those words are enough to make Ander breakdown completely. His body starts to tremble with small whimpers that quickly escalate to sobs when Omar wraps his arms around his body, gripping him into a tight hug. While he loses himself, Omar simply rocks him back and forth against his chest. He whispers sweet nothings into his ear as his presses gentle kisses to the top of his skull, occasionally taking in the sent of his boyfriend, never wanted to forget his warmth.

"Please Omar…Don’t…Don’t leave me." Ander hiccupped through his sobs.