dear Sen,
dear sen.
though it wasnât you that i sang to that day in the middle of the fucking night. i guess we ended up bonding pretty well. and i donât mind your messy place as long as you donât bring the mess to mine. really, itâs not even that messy. it reflects you perfectly to be honest. the paint everywhere, the unfinished paintings, the scrambled up papers and the splatter. i can see you in everything. because within that mess, beyond what you first see, thereâs also beauty - art. art which comes from hard work and many times of failure, splatter and messes. iâm not trying to justify your mess ( i still hate that a little bit ) but iâm saying itâs kind of cool. and despite this i can find you being a good friend in times where i donât even know how to use my messy brain. though youâve told me what to do a thousand times ( just! do! it! ) and i know that youâre right, sometimes i just canât do the right thing. but you must know that already, that i canât do anything right anymore. thatâs already proven - i am the outcome of a row of bad decisions and you, you are a part of a puzzle i canât figure out. i treasure you and the moments we have together already, i keep them in my mind like precious memories. youâre beautiful, smart, creativeâ and donât get me wrong, i am saying this in the most loving way ever; youâre such a mess.








